Page 24 of Inked Desires

ANDREW

The sterile scent of disinfectant fills the air, cold and impersonal. The steady beeps of the heart monitor are the only proof that life hasn’t abandoned him yet.

His hand rests in mine. The roughness of his knuckles contrasts with the unsettling paleness of his face. He always had that hard, untamable look. But here, lying under the hospital’s pale light, he seems so fragile it makes me nauseous.

I’m exhausted. My eyelids burn, my body protests, but sleep is out of the question. I have to watch over him. Be here when he wakes up.

A voice pulls me from my stupor.

“How is he?”

I don’t turn my head. I already know who’s standing beside me. And without him, I wouldn’t even be allowed here.

Ares and I aren’t married. No official tie binds me to him. Yet, we have endured more than a lifetime of suffering together. And a great part of that pain, I inflicted on him myself.

Because of me, he’s here.

His heart stopped. The love of my life died in my arms. Just for a moment. Just long enough to break me.

I would have taken it all for him. Every blow, every humiliation, every punishment from Jace. But Ares chose to protect me. He threw himself at him without hesitation.

I stayed frozen. Not out of fear. Not out of panic. Just the brutal shock of a veil tearing apart.

Suddenly, everything was there. The seven lost years, the erased memories, every moment with him. It wasn’t a fleeting image anymore. Not a simple flash.

It was right there.

If I hadn’t frozen, if I hadn’t wasted those precious seconds trying to understand… maybe he wouldn’t be fighting to survive now. Maybe he wouldn’t be covered in stitches and needles, connected to these machines keeping him alive.

Maybe I wouldn’t have to pray for him to open his eyes.

“Nothing new,” I reply to Robert’s question.

“The local police closed the case,” he informs me. “You have nothing to fear anymore, it’s over.”

I blink, barely sure I heard right.

“They actually investigated?”

My voice is almost a whisper.

“You stabbed him twenty-seven times. That might raise some suspicion.”

I hear the smile in his voice. What’s supposed to be funny? I killed a man. Not in self-defense. In a fit of rage. I broke down, plain and simple.

Recovering my memories was a blessing, but also a poisoned gift. The truth hit me like a freight train—too late to turn back. Jace had already stolen my child. I refused to let him take Ares too.

Robert sighs softly.

“You should go home and get some sleep.”

As if sleep could fix anything.

It’s been four days since Ares has been here. And four days that Robert has come by daily, trying to start a conversation. But I don’t want to talk to anyone.

In a way, I’m grateful to him. Without Robert, I might not even be allowed to stay by Ares’s side. But that doesn’t mean I appreciate the company. Least of all his.

“I’m fine,” I grunt.

I hear his exasperated sigh, which makes me roll my eyes.

His hand appears in my field of vision. He places a bag on the bedside table.

“Eat something,” he murmurs before his footsteps echo away and the door closes behind him.

Immediate relief washes over me. Finally alone.

Exhausted, I lean forward, resting my forehead on the corner of the mattress. A faint scent reaches me, but it’s not his. A shiver runs through me. I miss him. I miss his scent.

Ares was my refuge. My home. And it’s been ages since I last felt at home.

I close my eyes and sigh. How much longer? When will he finally open them? I need to see them. Need to be sure he’s okay. That the resuscitation wasn’t in vain.

I just want my grumpy man back.

A faint groan breaks the silence. My breath catches instantly, my muscles freeze. Did I dream it? Or is it real?

I hold my breath, straining to listen, but nothing else comes. Maybe my mind is playing tricks. Yet, an odd trembling seizes me. Slowly, I raise my head.

And there he is.

His eyes are open. He’s looking at me, still a bit lost, but awake.

“You’re awake!” I exclaim, my voice trembling with emotion.

Ares immediately grimaces. Even I find my own enthusiasm too loud.

“Obviously… Fuck, everything hurts. I survived?”

I almost laugh if only a part of me wasn’t still clutching the fear of another tragedy. Misfortune seems to chase me, and I’m still waiting for the next disaster.

“I would never have let you die,” I whisper, squeezing his hand gently.

Ares turns his palm and intertwines our fingers—a simple gesture, but incredibly reassuring.

“You look like hell,” he says after studying me for a moment.

I roll my eyes.

“You’re adorable, really. Always so delicate.”

A weak smile pulls at his lips.

“When was the last time you went home? Wait… how long have I been here?”

“Don’t you want me to call a doctor first? You’re barely awake, babe.”

“‘Babe’?” he repeats, raising an eyebrow.

“Does that bother you?”

His smile widens slightly. He shakes his head slowly.

“No… I like it. But no doctor. Not yet. Tell me what happened.”

So I tell him everything. The resuscitation, the police breaking in through the window, thinking I’d killed both men. My arrest. The endless interrogation. The night at the station pacing like a lion in a cage until Robert showed up to get me out. No one wanted to believe me. And Ares… Ares wasn’t there anymore to confirm my story. I didn’t even know if he was still breathing.

“I was terrified for you,” I confess, my throat tight. “I didn’t know where you were or if you were alive. I didn’t care if they locked me up. All I wanted was for them to tell me if you had survived. But they said nothing…”

I leave out that Jace had been watching us for some time already. That the FBI had found his camp in Maple Creek. That my ex-husband was just waiting for the right moment to kill me. Ares was just collateral damage in his eyes.

His hand tightens around mine, as if to pull me back to the present, to remind me that he’s here, truly here. He’s the one trying to reassure me, when it should be the other way around.

“I’m here now,” he murmurs.

I lift my eyes to him. His dark irises shine with an intensity I’ve never seen before. A shiver runs through me. It took me a long time to understand what he meant to me, but now, it’s clear as day.

Ares is my anchor. He is what I’ve been searching for all my life.

“Please… don’t ever stand in front of a gun for me again,” I whisper.

The smile fades from his face. His gaze grows serious, piercing.

“I don’t think you realize how much I love you, Andrew,” he replies softly. “I will always throw myself in front of you, little rabbit.”

I know he means it. And I also know that here, in this hospital room, I can’t convince him otherwise. Because I, too, without hesitation, would always stand between him and a weapon.

No doubt about that.

We are anything but perfect. We’re battered, scarred by the past, made of wounds and mistakes. But in my eyes, he’s perfect.

Ares is alive. Against all odds, against the fate that seemed bent on tearing us apart, he’s here. And I will never leave him again.

Even if that damn ex-husband of his reappears. Even if other obstacles rise in our path. It doesn’t matter. He’s mine, and I’m his.

I’m ready to do anything to give him the happiness he deserves. To prove to him that, despite our flaws and shadows, we deserve this light.