Page 72 of Inked & Bloodbound
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I should never have pushed you. If anything happened to you…”
“Something did happen to me,” she whispers, and it stops me dead in my tracks.
She’s right. She wasn’t killed, but she was harmed. The purple welts forming around the wounds on her neck are proof of that.
“I don’t blame you for it,” she continues, eyes still closed. “But you should have listened to me. I’m a big girl. You couldn’t have known that would happen, but please don’t do that to me again. When I tell you something, you’ve got to trust me. I’ve been on my own a long time. I know what’s best for me.”
I stroke her eyebrow with my thumb, and she pushes against my palm like an impatient cat trying to get more pets. Her eyelids flutter open, and I see the light gradually returning to them.
“You know what’s best for you,” I repeat.
I watch as awareness creeps back in. First, recognition of where she is. Then, memory of what happened. I see the exact moment it all comes flooding back. Her fingers instinctively move to her throat, assessing the damage.
“He could have killed me,” she whispers, and the words sting like a slap on burnt skin.
“But he didn’t. I wouldn’t let that happen.”
She studies my face in the cold bathroom light. “You were going to kill him, weren’t you? If I hadn’t stopped you.”
I can’t lie to her. “Yes.”
My fingers move to her neck, tracing the marks left by that piece of shit back at the bar. She winces, and a blazing rage ignites inside me.
That cannot happen tomorrow. Lily cannot be hurt again. I will burn this city to the ground before I let anyone else touch her.
Except the weaker I get, the harder it is to protect her. The creeping blackness in my veins is growing by the day. And when I notice it’s climbed yet higher, I shove my sleeve down to cover it.
I have to finish this tomorrow. No matter what it takes.
Lily’s quiet for a long time, processing the events of the last few hours. Now this is real. She’s finally seen what I’m capable of, even if I’m half the vampire I once was. The water cools around her, but she doesn’t seem to notice.
“I’ve seen some traumatic shit, but never seen anything like that,” she says finally. “The way your eyes burned red like that. The sound his bones made when you…” She trails off, shaking her head.
I have to ask, even though I’m terrified of the answer. “Are you afraid of me now?”
She considers this seriously. “I guess I should be. Any sane person would be. But all I kept thinking was how safe I felt when you showed up.” Her eyes meet mine. “Does that make me crazy?”
“It makes you mine,” I say before I can stop myself. “And I have to protect what’s mine.”
There’s too much heat on her now. Without her by my side, I’ll be at a disadvantage against enemies who grow stronger while my power shrinks.
Unless…
No. I couldn’t do it. Hurt her again when she’s at her most vulnerable. Push my fangs into the spot where that parasite was just tearing into her flesh and drink her blood like the lowly bloodsucker I am. Take advantage of her weakness and pray I’d be able to stop myself.
But a treacherous part of me knows the truth—her gift could be the advantage I need to get Megan to safety and end this pact. If I don’t, I’m dead. And if I’m dead, Lily dies with me. Every day, my ability to protect her slips further away.
I have to drink from her. Even if it destroys us both. Even if I can’t admit to myself how desperately I crave it.
A little pain now, so she can be safer later. That’s what I tell myself.
She blinks up at me from the bath, curiosity burning in her eyes. Her water-wrinkled fingers reach up to trace my jaw.
“You want to drink from me,” she says quietly.
Shit. I haven’t been guarding my thoughts around her lately, but her abilities are returning after the psychic battering at the Jackalope. I think about lying, but there’s no point.
“Yes.” The word is bitter. “Some of your abilities transferred to me last time, and we need every advantage tomorrow. Nocturne will be ten times worse than tonight. More vampires, older ones, more dangerous. I’m sorry, but I can’t let you walk into that, not after what happened. But I need to be able to hear their thoughts.”