Page 40 of Inhuman Nature

“Wait, isTwilightlike a meme for vampires?”

“Pretty sure it’s a meme for humans too,” Shaun said, avoiding the actual question.

“You’ve seen the movies, though?”

Shaun moved his head in a manner that left DJ unsure whether the action had been meant as a nod or a shake.

“Shaun…” he said, drawing his name out. “Were you, like,intoTwilight?” The guilty expression on Shaun’s face told him he’d stumbled upon the motherlode. “You weren’t just into Twilight…you were a full-on Twihard, weren’t you?”

Shaun buried his face in his hands.

Rake coughed to get DJ’s attention. “What’s a Twihard?”

“Die-hardTwilightfan, obviously,” DJ said, having no patience at that moment for Rake’s lack of knowledge aboutanything outside of his own niche interests.

“Obviously,” Rake echoed with a sigh.

DJ went over to where Shaun stood, placing a hand on his nape and rubbing gentle circles into his exposed skin. “I’m not judging, by the way. The movies were fun, and the mum and dad vampires were hot.”

Shaun mumbled something into his hands.

“What was that?” DJ asked, trying desperately to stop himself from laughing. He didn’t quite succeed.

“I was obsessed with Edward,” Shaun said, removing his hands from his face. “It was… Well, it was how I ended up getting recreated as a vampire.”

“You manifested it?”

“Kinda? I was active on Twilight fanfiction sites and I got talking to Lawrence on a related forum.”

“Oh. Oh, god.” DJ wasn’t laughing anymore.

“Yeah,” Shaun said with a shake of his head. “Be careful what you wish for, kids. That creepy dude you met online who claims he’s a vampire who wants to take your virginity and make you his immortal slave? He might actually be a vampire who wants to take your virginity and make you his immortal slave.”

Rake’s muttered, “Fuck,” rather eloquently summed up DJ’s own sentiment.

“The worst part, though?” Shaun said. “After seeing New Moon, I became Team Jacob.”

Rake looked blankly at Shaun, but DJ let out a giggle that edged on manic. Shaun’s ability to have even the slightest levity surprised him.

“It’s so cringe,” Shaun complained.

“At least you don’t sparkle in the sun.” DJ paused. “Wait, you don’t sparkle in the sun, do you?”

“Nope. The sun will, however, turn me into a pile of ashes. You can imagine how disappointed I was to discover I was still going to have to buy body glitter any time I wanted to shine.” Shaun punctuated his point by throwing some half-hearted jazz hands.

DJ snorted. This version of Shaun differed from the one they’d been meeting at the club. He hadn’t expected the snark. Part of him suspected Shaun was masking his true feelings with humour, however. He seemed far too bright for someone who’d suffered so much.

“I have no idea what either of you are talking about,” Rake said, running his hands through his hair. The static he generated had so much of it standing on end that DJ went to flatten it down for him.

“You don’t need to know, babe. Just that Lawrence is an asshole who preys on—” DJ broke off, looking at Shaun in horror. “Teenagers, right? What age were you when he...?” His stomach roiled. He’d thought Shaun looked too young to be at the club.

Shaun gave him a flat-lipped smile. “I was eighteen. Just. He recreated me on my birthday. Worst. Present. Ever,” he added in a monotone.

“Christ.” DJ could barely get his head around it.

“Wait, so what age are you now?” Rake asked.

“My early thirties.”