Page 14 of In a Rake’s Embrace (Sins & Sensibilities #3)

CHAPTER 14

I t was illogical, but Agatha found herself craving a kind of revenge. She couldn’t comprehend how her own body had yielded to such excruciating pleasure—pleasure that left her trembling, vulnerable, and still aching for fulfillment after a night of restless sleep. What stung even more was the knowledge that the earl had maintained his control while she had been utterly undone. It gnawed at her, the thought that he had reasserted command over himself while she had spiraled into sensation. She wanted to unravel him the way he had undone her.

“Let me see if we understand,” Ellen said slowly, sharing a conspiratorial glance with Bea. “You want to know how to drive Lord Radbourne to the brink, to make him suffer with pleasure?”

“Yes.”

Bea chuckled softly. “Oh, darling, after your lesson last night, do you wish to challenge the earl? He seemed to be a master at forced pleasure and of himself. No lady here has ever made him lose any sense of himself. Radbourne has never been enamored of anyone, and if a lady seemed to like him too much or became clingy, he dismissed her.”

“There’s no chance he’ll dismiss me. As my tutor and a man of honor, he’ll see his commitment through to the end.”

“You seem to know him well,” Ellen said, canting her head to study Agatha.

“I know only what he shows me,” she said.

“Have you considered that might turn the tables on you again for another lesson? Not only the fourth floor will hear your pleas for mercy.”

Agatha’s cheeks flushed, but she held her ground. “Perhaps.”

“There are so many ways to torment a man using only your mouth.” Bea leaned in, her gaze gleaming with mischievous delight. “You must learn to draw out the anticipation, tease him until he is desperate for more.”

“How?”

Ellen’s smile widened, her voice dropping to a sultry whisper. “Start slowly ... kiss him in places he does not expect, perhaps the hollow of his throat, just beneath the ear. Men are sensitive there, more than they care to admit. Light, feathery touches with your lips, never rushing.”

Bea frowned thoughtfully. “The earl has bedded neither Ellen nor me. However, he has been with Hettie ... and she mentioned though he is a giving lover he is also ... cold and indifferent to her touches. She never made him lose control, and whenever she tried, he merely smiled with that mocking humor in his eyes. Lady Susanna then took up the challenge and failed miserably.”

Oh! “Bloody hell,” Agatha whispered.

Ellen smiled—a sly, almost dangerous curve of her lips. “I think you should still try.”

“I agree,” Bea added, her eyes dancing with devilish amusement. “Tell him you want to see and understand the male body. You want to ... touch and be familiar so you are not scared.”

“I like that,” Agatha said, smiling.

“Take this chance to touch him all over, all for education purposes, of course,” Ellen said. “Trace his skin with your tongue, the curve of his jaw, the hollow of his collarbone. Let your breath be warm against his skin, but never too much contact. Make him want it—make him beg for more.”

Agatha’s pulse quickened as the image formed in her mind, the tantalizing power of turning the tables, making him lose that iron-clad control he seemed to wield so easily.

“And when you finally reach his cock,” Ellen continued, “take him into your mouth, slowly, agonizingly slowly. Do not rush to please him. Every flick of your tongue should be deliberate, as if you are tasting him, learning him. Let him know you are in control.”

Bea leaned closer, her voice a velvet caress. “Make him feel every single stroke of your lips, every gentle scrape of your teeth. Vary your pressure—sometimes soft, sometimes firm—but never too much at once. And when he thinks he cannot stand it anymore ... slow down. That is the real torment.”

Agatha felt a rush of heat surge through her at their words, thrill and anticipation swelling in her chest. There was a wicked satisfaction in imagining herself in that role—teasing, tormenting, making him come undone.

Even if she failed, she would feel better for trying.

“And when you know he is close,” Bea added, her lips curving into a sly smile, “pull away. Make him ask for it. Make him beg. That is where the power lies, darling.”

Ellen nodded in agreement, her eyes glittering with amusement. “The moment you have him at the edge, that is when you will see just how easily control slips away.”

The thought of driving Thomas to that brink, of seeing him struggle to hold onto his composure, made her pulse race.

“I will make him beg,” she whispered.

Yet there was another part of her that simply wanted to give him pleasure. Agatha shied away from that awareness.

Both women grinned, their eyes gleaming with approval.

“We can teach you all the ways a woman can use her mouth to tease, torment, and unravel a man like him. Believe me, it’s an art,” Ellen murmured. “But we cannot promise it will work.”

“I will—” Agatha began, determination blossoming through her when a sharp knock interrupted.

The door swung open to reveal Madam Rebecca standing with a composed smile. “Lord Radbourne is here for you, Agatha.”

Astonished, she shot to her feet, glancing at the clock on the mantel. “It is only noon.”

Curiosity glinted in Rebecca’s gaze. “It is most unusual, indeed. The earl has never entered these premises before ten at night.”

With a hurried farewell to Bea and Ellen, Agatha made her way to Thomas’s private quarters, warmth and another unknown emotion flickering in her chest. She knocked gently and then opened the door. As she stepped inside, their gazes met. It was impossible not to remember the overwhelming intimate details of their encounter and impossible not to blush. The low throb in her belly deepened. Her face turned scarlet. Thomas’s expression, however, remained carefully composed, revealing nothing of the savage desire she had seen last night.

“I did not expect you,” she said softly. “Is everything well?”

“I have a request,” Thomas said, his voice measured, though his eyes were unreadable. “It is unusual, and you are free to decline.”

Her pulse quickened. “What is it?”

“I have arranged to take my brother up in an air balloon this evening.”

“An air balloon?”

“Yes.” Thomas continued, his gaze softening slightly as he spoke of his brother. “Ronald has wanted to experience itfor the last three years. He has always said he would one day find the courage to soar closer to the stars, but until now, he kept putting it off. While we were in Bath, he told me he was finally ready. The balloon ride is arranged for today at seven in the evening. He has been talking about it nonstop.”

She smiled. “It sounds as if itwould be a thrilling experience.”

Thomas’s expression grew more guarded, as if bracing himself for what he was about to say. “The thing is, Ronald ... he specifically asked for you to join us.”

Agatha jolted. “ Me? ”

Thomas nodded, running a hand through his hair. “He made the request this morning. I tried to discourage him, but he was adamant. He insisted I ask you to come along. At first, I thought to pretend I had asked, but I have never lied to my brother, and I will not start now. If you are unable to join, I will convey your regrets.”

Her heart gave a small flutter. “Do you want me to be there?”

His expression tightened further. “It does not matter what I want. This is about my brother.”

The thought of soaring above the earth in a balloon was thrilling. But still, curiosity burned in her. “Why does he want me there? We barely spoke.”

A flicker of humor gleamed in Thomas’s eyes. “He said a handsome man and a beautiful woman should share an adventure like this. It seems my brother has taken quite a liking to you.”

Agatha smiled, warmth filling her chest. “I would be honored to join you both.”

“Thank you,” he said. “But I will warn you, Ronald is ... different. He is far more than most people give him credit for, but should you treat him in any way that hurts him, you will regret it. So, perhaps you should consider carefully if you are certain about joining.”

Though softly spoken, the wordslanded with the weight of a sharp warning. A spark of indignation flared in Agatha’s chest.

“I would never treat anyone in a way that would make them feel less,” she said, her chin jutting out defiantly. “Why would you even suggest such a thing?”

“I do not know you,” he said, his tone chilling.

“You know enough.”

“Do I?”

“Yes. Surely, you have formed an impression of my character as I have formed of yours. Certainly, I am not more discerning than you are, my lord!”

He prowled toward her, something dangerous flashing in his eyes. “Do you think because I have tasted your sweet pussy and made you gush on my fingers and tongue, I know the kind of woman you are?”

A shocking wave of arousal rushed through her at his words, but a sharp surge of anger matched it.

“Even if you do not know me, do not judge me based on those who have disappointed you! I am my own person, my lord. Like or hate me, but do so because of what I show you and nothing else.”

Her breath came in ragged gasps as she realized how close he had come. Agatha was pressed against the wall, his presence towering over her. He braced one hand beside her head and tipped her chin up with the other, forcing her to meet his gaze. Their gazes collided, and her heart stuttered. His breath was warm against her lips, and her nipples hardened in response.

A faint smile curved his mouth, though his eyes remained cold. “Are we having our first fight?”

“Yes.”

Her response was huskier than she intended, her belly tightening with the tension simmering between them. Irritated by how her body responded to his proximity, she glared at him. The tight, charged air between them only intensified.

He studied her, his eyes dark and contemplative. “Ronald is different. I do not want anyone to define him because of it. Do I have unrealistic expectations? Perhaps. But he is my brother, and I love him. Once, I trusted someone deeply, and she stood by while others mocked him—she even laughed while they hurt him.”

Agatha’s chest clenched with horror. “Thomas ... I am so sorry.”

“You are right,” he admitted softly. “I should not judge you based on someone else’s actions. I have enough good sense to know that not everyone is the same, and a person should be measured by their words, actions, and honor. It will not happen again, Agatha.”

Her throat tightened. “Thank you.

He lowered his head in a sharp nod.

“Did you make them apologize?”

A faint smile tugged at his mouth. “When I found three supposed friends by the lake, tossing apple cores at Ronald while he sobbed, and my fiancée laughed, my reaction was immediate, brief and vicious. Everyone left with bloodied lips, and there was a broken bone. I waded in with my fists.”

His fiancée ?

Thomas’s hand left her chin and touched the scar on his cheek. As if realizing he had revealed more than intended, his expression grew distant again, and he began to pull away. But Agatha moved with him, sliding one hand around his neck while the other lightly traced the scar on his face.

“I hope you hurt them,” she murmured. “ Badly .”

“Bloodthirsty.”

Her heart stuttered. “When necessary. I am very protective of my family … I cannot imagine them being so hurt.”

His lips twitched in amusement. “I have never spoken to anyone about that incident. Not even my closest friends, Oliver or James.”

Her eyes widened. This admission felt like a warning—an unspoken caution that she had touched something he rarely shared, and if she were not careful with what he offered, Agatha would bitterly regret it.

His fingers grazed her cheek, then traced the delicate arch of her brow. “It was a temporary madness. It will not happen again.”

“Thomas,” she said, her chest warming with a peculiar tenderness. “I would never betray your confidence.”

“We shall see.”

The cold mistrust in his gaze was painful to bear.

“My father is obsessed with gambling,” she admitted, holding his eyesand feeling a raw vulnerability she hadn’t endured when David demanded to know why they were leaving Cringleford and why she no longer wished to marry. “He owed eighty pounds and couldn’t repay it. He … he offered my younger sister in service here at Aphrodite to clear his debt.”

He went still. “Why are you telling me this?”

Agatha swallowed, her throat tight. “Because … I want to give you a part of myself, too. Something real.”

His unwavering gaze roamed her face, yet there was a tenderness there she had never seen before. She didn’t know what to make of it. Agatha wished he didn’t wear indifference like a second skin so she could read and understand him better. In the few times they met, there always lingered a distant aloofness and an austereness to his expression. Agatha … wanted to shatter it and know the gentleman beneath hiscultivated, impenetrable mask.

The awareness made her heart stutter. This man before her was untouchable for someone like her, and it was utterly foolish even to entertain the thought of being drawn closer to his allure.

Thomas is only my tutor, nothing more , she told herself firmly, almost frightened by the softening she felt inside, the growing longing to sit and laugh with him.

“How did you end up here instead?” he asked, his voice quieter now.

“My … my sister is only sixteen.”

“That blackguard,” he hissed. “How could he be so vile?”

The earl’s distaste was oddly comforting. “I couldn’t bear the thought of her coming, so I took her place. A duke settled the debt for me—without asking for anything in return. I returned home afterward, but I knew my father would gamble again. He always does.”

A searing flash of awareness burned through her as she stared at Thomas, and regret unexpectedly twisted inside her. Too many emotions quaked through her heart, and she did not want this man to know how much she had wept and feared, how much pride she had relinquished to decide to auction her virginity so her family might live in contentment. She turned away, hiding her face from his steady gaze, but he didn’t push her for more.

A long silence stretched between them, nearly unbearable. Then, in a low murmur, Thomas said, “I’ll send my carriage for you at seven.”

Surprised, Agatha looked up and found him watching her as if she were an enigma he couldn’t quite solve. She nodded, then quickly turned and hurried back to her bedchamber, wondering at the imperceptible shift between them just now.