Page 41 of Immoral (Park Avenue Kings #3)

BENOIT

“ W HAT EXACTLY AM I looking at here?” Archer, my best friend since college and a member of the Libertines—though he hadn’t chosen to be one of the Kings—stared down at the open trunk in my parlor as I sipped on my fourth glass of wine.

“Don’t pretend you haven’t seen four million dollars before,” I said, stretching my long legs out on the leather ottoman in front of me. Thank God the alcohol was finally kicking in, giving my brain a reprieve from the constant overthinking and pining of the last few days.

More specifically, since I’d seen the look on Dimitri’s face as he stood outside his house watching me climb into King’s helicopter. I’d never get over it. It was so full of want and need and regret—but also, strangely, hope, like for a moment he thought I’d turn around and come back.

But staying wasn’t part of the deal. And neither of us was the type to have a relationship, especially not with our respective jobs.

Still…

I drained the rest of my glass and held it out toward Archer for another.

He arched a brow and came over to take it. “You’ve polished off a bottle since I arrived. You sure opening another is a good idea?”

“It’s a fan-fucking-tastic idea,” I said, waving him in the direction of my wine rack nearby. “Make it a good one, please, Archer dear. The older the better.”

When he returned, he carried an extra glass with mine and a vintage bottle, maybe the oldest in my collection.

I gave him a lazy grin. “That’s perfect. Merci , darling.”

Archer shook his head as he peeled off the top wrapping and began to unscrew the cork. He started to pour it into the decanter, but I reached for the fancy crystal and set it out of his reach.

“The glass, please.”

He made a face as if to say, Really? but poured us both a glass anyway and handed me one. “Care to explain why you have four million dollars sitting in front of your fireplace like you’re about to toss it in?”

“I’m not so far gone I’d burn money.” I brought my glass to my lips and paused. “I don’t think.”

“This have anything to do with disappearing for a month?”

“Kings business.”

“You don’t ever come back from Kings business so depressed. Actually”—he took a seat in the leather chair across from me—“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you depressed. At least not since…”

I was grateful he didn’t continue that thought. Archer had been there for all the family and relationship drama in college, and it wasn’t something we ever spoke of out loud. There was no need. I was fine. Absolutely fabulous.

And now I had a nice buzz to go along with all my fabulousness.

“Okaaay,” he said when silence filled the air between us. “You called me over, I’m assuming to chat. Vent. Drink all your wine with you.”

“Mmm, yes. Drinking sounds good.”

“What did you have to do for that money, Benny?”

I swirled my glass and stared into its rich red depths. “Nothing I didn’t want to.”

Archer took a sip of his drink, his stare louder than any words as he watched me over the rim of his glass.

“Or should I say no one.”

“Ah.” The smug bastard grinned. “Now we’re getting somewhere.”

“No, we’re not.” I pouted. “Because I’m not talking about it. Not now, not ever.”

“Because you can’t?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

“That’s obvious, since you literally asked me to come over here for a chat.”

“ Oui , but I didn’t say about what.” I rolled my eyes. “Maybe I wanted to see how life is going with your pretty young thing.”

“He said with such obvious interest.”

“You know, you’re not usually this obnoxious. Maybe I called the wrong friend.”

Archer chuckled and reached over to pluck the wine glass from my fingers. “I don’t think that’s it at all. You look miserable. And there’s only two reasons I’ve ever seen you look that way—the first when you had to miss Fleet Week, and the second when he-who-won’t-be-named broke your heart.”

This was the problem in inviting over the one person who knew you almost as well as you knew yourself to commiserate with.

“And since Fleet Week isn’t for another five months, I’m thinking?—”

“Well, stop that.”

“—you’ve had your heart broken. The real question is: by whom?”

I waved him off and turned back to face the crackling fire, and an image of me and Dimitri tangled in front of his fireplace flashed before my eyes.

Ugh, anytime these memories wanted to exit my brain would be great.

“Benny?”

“Huh?”

“Who is he? Or can you not say?”

I gave him a droll look. Archer knew better than that. He was my vault and I was his. That was why he’d trusted me with his little—okay, enormous—scandal when he fell for his daughter’s boyfriend.

So the least I could do was return the favor and let him know I’d fallen for one of the most dangerous men in the world.It was kind of the same, right? Both relationships had the potential to blow up in our faces—mine just might include real explosives.

“His name is…Dimitri.”

Archer grinned. “Greek?”

“ Oui .” I let out a sigh and closed my eyes, picturing Dimitri’s dark hair, intense eyes, and sculpted jawline. “A Greek god.”

A low chuckle had me opening my eyes and turning to my so-called friend. I was seriously thinking about revoking that title.

“You’ve got it bad.”

“I’ve got nothing.”

“Not true.” Archer gestured to the trunk my feet were still propped up on. “You’ve got four million dollars. So, um, want to tell me why a man you’re pickling your liver over while crying sent you said dollars?”

“I’m not crying.” Although I might’ve been last night. Those eye patches I spend way too much money on clearly don’t do shit for puffiness.

“What happened? And don’t say nothing. Not when you’re usually telling me you have a man in every port.”

“I usually do have a man in every port. It just so happens that this time it was the same man in every port.”

“This Dimitri guy.”

“Right.”

“And where is he now?”

“Not here.” I held my hand up with a flourish. “He’ll never be here…”

I thought of the steely resolve that had crossed his features as the helicopter finally flew away. If there’d been any chance of seeing him again, an iota of hope that maybe one day our paths would cross again, I had destroyed it in that moment.

“But you want him to be?”

I couldn’t blame Archer for the question. This kind of behavior wasn’t normal for me. I didn’t lose my mind over men, and I certainly never cried into thousand-dollar bottles of wine over them.

Not until Dimitri.

“I don’t know what I want.”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Archer handed me back my glass. “I think you know exactly what you want. In fact, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that you, my friend, are in love.”

I started to laugh…hysterically. Because of course I was in love. I’d gone and fallen for the one man I couldn’t have. A man I’d been sent to spy on. A man who had paid for my body and stolen my heart.

“Is he dead?”

I whipped my head in Archer’s direction, and he shrugged.

“Well, is he?”

“ Non… ” At least, he wasn’t when I last saw him. Please, God, don’t let him be now.

“Then why can’t he be here?”

“Because…he could be anywhere.” Even as those words tumbled off my tongue, I knew how ridiculous they sounded. But Archer didn’t understand the complexities here. Dimitri and I had completely separate lives, heavy demands placed on the both of us. It would never work.

Or maybe that was just what I told myself to stop the ache in my chest every time I thought about the fact that we could but chose not to. We had the means to travel. I could be on his doorstep in a few hours. He could be on mine.

I took a long sip of wine and shook those thoughts out of my head.“It could never work.”

“Sounds like the same thing I told you about Preston.”

“And look at you now. Living with your pretty young thing in unwedded bliss.”

“For now.” He shot me a wink, and even in my inebriated state, I read between those lines.

“ Mon Dieu. Does that mean…? Are you thinking about?—”

He smiled broadly. “Soon. You’ve got great taste, so I’ll need your help finding the perfect ring.”

My jaw continued to hold court on the floor as I stared at my friend. Even with the weight sitting on my chest, I couldn’t help but return his grin. It was contagious.

“I’m so happy for you, my friend. Truly.”

“Thank you. It feels right.”

“I can’t imagine a hot twenty-something who wouldn’t.” When Archer rolled his eyes, I added, “I’m kidding, of course. I like him. And I like him for you. I also feel responsible for encouraging this pairing, so I’ll take all the credit when you get engaged.”

“But of course.” He smirked and held my gaze, but the longer he watched me, the more serious the set to his lips became. “What can I do to help?”

“You’re already here and drinking my best wine.”

“You want this guy? Dimitri?”

“I can’t have him.”

“Has that ever stopped you before?”

I couldn’t argue with that. A challenge only made me put in more effort.

So why did this feel different? Was it the fear deep down that maybe after all this, Dimitri would reject me?

“I’ll tell you how you can help me,” I said, and nodded at the trunk. “Call your boyfriend and tell him you’re staying with me tonight to make sure I don’t burn four million dollars.”

“If you want it out of your sight, I’ll gladly take it off your hands. Or you could donate it. It might make you feel better about your…deal.”

Those were tempting ideas, but getting rid of the money, no matter how little I needed it, would be like getting rid of the last of Dimitri, and selfishly, I wanted to keep him close just a little longer.

It wasn’t the healthiest decision, but neither was refilling my glass for a fifth time. Or sixth. I’d already lost count.

Without any prompting, Archer topped off my wine, and I held my glass out toward his.

“Why don’t we toast to something happy? To your impending engagement and my return to bachelorhood.”

I forced a smile as Archer’s glass clinked against mine, but as I swallowed down the cabernet, all I could think about was where in the world Dimitri was laying his head tonight.

And if he was thinking about me.