Page 42 of Ignited Spirits (Haunted Magic #3)

IZZY

“ I don’t need you to make it right or avenge me.

I just need you to love me—” My voice breaks, and I angrily swipe the rogue tear rolling down my cheek.

“I want you to love me, even though you know what happened. Even though you know I was too weak to stop it. Even though you know that they touched me.”

“Fuck, baby,” Bishop rasps before he whirls around and closes the gap between us in a few steps.

He pulls me into his arms, his hold almost desperate.

“You’re the only one who can break my heart with only a few words.

Of course I love you, so damn much it hurts.

I will spend the rest of my fucking life telling you that none of this was your fault if that’s what it takes to get you to believe me. ”

I’m shaking my head before he finishes. “I let it happen. I had magic that I could’ve used to stop it, and I didn’t.”

I didn’t know what they were going to do the first time until it happened. Once I realized, I was too shocked to defend myself. And every time after that, I was too scared and weak to think clearly enough to make them stop.

Even if I were able to think clearly, I probably wouldn’t have used my magic, if I’m being honest. Keeping my family safe was always the most important, even over keeping myself safe.

“No, you fucking didn’t let it happen. The Giles brothers and Whelan’s son abused the power they thought they had over you.

And using your magic would’ve put you and your family in a shit ton of danger, so it was an impossible choice.

In no universe did you make them touch you or hurt you or…

rape you.” Bishop’s blue eyes swirl with storm clouds and heartbreak as he tries to figure out what exactly happened.

“They didn’t… none of it got that far,” I whisper, hoping he understands, since I can’t bring myself to say the word.

Because nothing that happened feels serious enough to warrant that word.

I don’t even feel like any of it qualifies as sexual assault, even though I logically know it does.

That feels like a term for people who are actually hurt, unlike me, who’s making a big deal out of some touching.

He closes his eyes before leaning his forehead on mine. “I suppose that’s something, but it doesn’t mean they didn’t hurt you, sweetheart.”

“Yeah,” I breathe because I can’t really deny that.

I feel someone step up against my back. By the vanilla citrus scent, I can tell it’s Archer, or, well, Legion right now, without even having to see him.

He wraps his arms around my middle and pulls me against him.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to express to you how fucking sorry I am you went through any of this, sunshine.

You are the light of my life and a genuinely good person.

You deserved so much better from the people in this shithole town.

Say the word, and you’ll never have to see it again. ”

“Sunny boy?” I ask in surprise before whirling around to face him. My heart skips a beat when I see his teal eyes staring down at me. Unlike usual, they’re swimming with a sadness that breaks my heart.

His mouth curves in a grin. “It’s me, Izzy.

The big guy agreed to let me have a little time with you.

He really cares about you, just so you know.

You’ve got a way about you that makes people fall in love with you.

I love you more than I ever knew I could love anyone.

Nothing will ever make me not love you, especially something that’s not even remotely your fault. ”

Archer hesitantly enfolds me in a hug, like he’s worried that I’m going to freak out.

I don’t. Instead, I throw my arms around his neck and soak up his unique brand of comfort. “I love you too.”

“Can I hold her?” Luca rasps from behind Bishop.

Sighing, Archer drops a kiss on my hair before stepping back.

I turn around and come face-to-face with Bishop again. His arms loop around me and crush me against him before they fall away. He presses a kiss to my forehead and reluctantly steps back.

Before I can miss the feel of his arms around me, Luca is pressed against my front and Cain against my back.

“I’m so fucking sorry, wildcat,” he murmurs into my hair. “I wish I had the words to convey any of the devastation or fury or everything else I feel on your behalf, but I want you to know that I love you more than anything. Nothing about this changes that.”

Tears prick my eyes at his quiet words, my wolf boy somehow knowing exactly what I needed to hear.

“I love you, too, angel. There isn’t anything you could do to make me stop loving you, but you didn’t do anything wrong here.

You were wronged. Just say the word, and I’ll eliminate all traces of every single one of them.

” Cain’s soft words somehow convey an entire ocean of emotion as he presses himself as tight to me as he can.

It’s weird how my heart can simultaneously feel shredded and raw and absolutely full of love at the same time.

“I love you both, too,” I mumble into Luca’s chest, not really knowing what to say to the rest of it.

It’s not like this is exactly the place to be having these heart-to-hearts. We have a job to get done, but them taking time to support and reassure me means so much more to me than I’ll ever be able to tell them.

They hold me for a long minute before eventually stepping back. I’m surprised Rhys is the next one in front of me. His hazel eyes are pinched with worry and swimming with regret. He holds out his arms for a hug, and I step into them without hesitation.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Iz?” Rhys asks softly, sounding heartbroken. “I thought we were close.”

“We are close, Rhys.” I hate that I made him question it because my older brothers are some of my best friends.

I’m lucky to have both of them. “I didn’t tell you because I’m…

ashamed, I guess. I also didn’t tell you because I knew exactly what you’d do, and I refuse to let you get in trouble trying to protect me.

I already cause enough trouble for our family just by existing. ”

He pulls back to look at me in disbelief. “Our whole family has severely fucked up if you, even for a moment, didn’t think you could tell us what happened. We would’ve gotten you justice and ensured those fuckers never even looked in your direction again.”

“I know you would’ve. That’s the problem.” I shake my head because he’s just not getting it. “I’m not worth the trouble it would’ve caused.”

“You are, Izzy,” Rhys tells me, his expression brimming with sincerity.

“You’re mine and Aiden’s only little sister.

You’re Mom and Dad’s only daughter. You’re the heart of our family.

You bring us together and make us stronger than we could ever be without.

You teach all of us what it means to love and sacrifice and give all of yourself to those you care about.

We are better people because we know and love you, and none of us would trade you for anything. ”

This time, I can’t keep the tears from leaking out. The unconditional love and acceptance from my mates and brother break the dam that was keeping all my feelings under control.

And it feels like it heals something in me. I’ve felt so dirty and ashamed for so long about what happened to me. I expected judgment and disgust and disdain from everyone I cared about because I’ve felt responsible for everything that happened.

They all have a good idea of what happened now, and not one of them is angry at or blames me.

If none of them hate me, then maybe I shouldn’t hate myself so much for what happened.

Maybe I should listen to them when they say it isn’t my fault.

Maybe I should forgive myself for what happened and not take responsibility for other people’s actions.

I sob in Rhys’s arms for longer than I should. He lets me soak his tee with tears as I shake from the force of the emotions I’d been bottling up for years.

Eventually, I’m able to get myself together enough to stop crying. This is so not the time to have a breakdown. Rubbing my hands over my eyes, I try to make myself look like I didn’t just cry my eyes out.

Taking a deep breath, I tell the room, “I’m sorry.”

Rhys’s mouth tips up in a half smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. “Stop apologizing, Iz. You’re allowed to feel, you know? You don’t have to be superhuman all the time.”

I huff a laugh. “I know. But this still isn’t the time. Who knows when someone is going to walk in here? We really didn’t have time for this whole breakdown and heart-to-heart thing that’s going on. So, let’s get the information we need and get the fuck out of here.”

No one protests, much to my relief, because I’m at my limit of emotional stuff I can handle right now. Nothing about this has gone right, and I really, really need something to start going to plan.

“I’ll unfreeze Giles so you can ask him your questions. If he’s not cooperating, I’ll just go through his memories. Does that work for you, little raven?” Levi asks.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” I don’t particularly want to talk to Giles, so I’d rather Levi just riffle through his brain. But I should probably try normal methods before wasting Levi’s magic like that.

Levi gives me a sharp nod before using his power to fling Giles back to the desk. He slams full force into the desk and rebounds hard enough to have his head jerking like a crash test dummy.

Levi smirks at the impact. “Oops.”

I snort because there’s no way that was an accident.

Releasing his power on Giles’s conscience, Levi wakes the councilman up.

Giles’s faded blue eyes dart around the office in confusion, probably wondering where he is, how he got here, and why he can’t move. When his gaze lands on the seven of us, understanding dawns before his face transforms into a scowl.