Page 28 of I Don’t Need Your Protection (Harrington Bay Academy #1)
Caleb
“Mom! Dad!”
I shoot up in bed, my heart pounding in my chest. My eyes narrow as I squint through the darkness. What was that?
“Mom!”
I turn on my bedside lamp and look to my left. Addilyn is thrashing in her bed as she moans, groans, and sounds like she’s in a lot of pain. It takes me less than a second to realize she’s having a nightmare.
“Dad!”
I leap off my bed and am by her side in an instant. Her body is drenched in sweat, her blanket and stuffed elephant kicked to the bottom of her bed, and her hands are in fists.
“Stop! No!”
“Addilyn.”
She continues to thrash around.
“Addilyn!”
Her shouts overshadow mine and it’s impossible to wake her. Reaching forward, I grab her arms to stop her from hurting herself.
Her legs kick her blanket further down as she throws her body from one end of her bed to the other.
“Addilyn!” I shake her, making sure not to harm her. “Addilyn!”
“No! No! Leave them alone!”
I gently shake her to try to wake her from the nightmare, but her crying and shouts intensify. They cause my heart to break for her. I can’t handle seeing her like this. All I want to do is take her pain away.
She slams her fist into my chest as she shouts at me to get away from her. I realize she thinks I’m a threat to her.
I slide into her bed and wrap my arms around her, not caring when her hand whacks me in the face or her leg kicks mine.
“Addilyn,” I say softly as I tighten my arms around her, trying to lock her arms in place so she won’t hurt herself. “It’s okay. You need to wake up now.”
“Mom! Dad!”
I press my cheek to hers, feeling her tears. “Addilyn, please wake up.” I hold her close, rocking slowly. “I’m here. No one is harming you. It’s just a nightmare.”
Her thrashing gradually stops. Her body goes stiff. Her eyes flutter open and she stares up at me. “Caleb?”
I push away some hair that’s matted to her sweaty forehead. “ I’m here.”
Her eyebrows furrow as she finds her body pretty much trapped in my arms. They widen, as though she has no clue how in the world she ended up like this. “What…what happened?”
I press my cheek to hers again. “It was just a nightmare. You’re safe.” I could let go. I should let go. But I don’t really want to.
“It was my parents,” she whispers. “They were…I was…” Her voice cracks.
“It’s okay, Addie,” I say softly. “You don’t have to talk about it.”
Her body trembles. She buries her face in my chest. Her skin feels warm against mine, and it causes my heart to pick up speed. But I push that aside. Now isn’t the appropriate time to be thinking about her skin pressed to my naked chest.
“They were chasing them,” she says. “I don’t know who they were, but they were chasing my mom and dad. They wanted to hurt them.”
It’s not surprising that she had a nightmare about her parents. It was a hard day for her, seeing her peers with their parents, having to deal with a fake mother and father, feeling alone in the world.
“I was chasing them, too, but I couldn’t find them,” she continues. “I couldn’t find them.”
I hold her close, murmuring soothing words in her ear—that she’s safe, that everything is okay, that I’m here for her.
She glances up at me, tears dripping down her cheeks. “I was so scared.”
“I know,” I whisper as I wipe away her tears with my thumbs. “I’m not leaving you. I’ll never leave you.”
She stares into my eyes, and for a second, I think she’ll pull out of my arms. But she doesn’t. It’s like she feels safe and protected. But I’m clutching her too tightly, and loosen my hold.
“No.” She snuggles close to me, her warmth overwhelming me, and her scent tickling my nose. “Don’t let go.”
I reach for her elephant and place it in her hands, then tighten my arms back around her. “I’m not leaving until you want me to. I’ll stay with you even when you go back to sleep.”
She shakes her head against my chest. “I’m not going back to sleep.”
“You’ll have to. You have a whole week of school ahead of you.”
She buries her face deeper in my chest. “Why do you smell so good?” she whispers.
My heart gallops in my chest and the room is getting hotter by the minute. “Addie.” I loosen my hold.
“No, please.”
“Okay, I won’t let go. But you have to go back to sleep. You can’t stay awake all night.”
“I can.”
“Addie—”
“I can’t shut my eyes. The second I do, I see…I see…no! I won’t do it.”
I press my face in her neck and whisper, “I’m here and I’ll protect you.”
She shakes her head again. “I’m not going back to sleep.”
“Okay. Do you want to watch TV?”
She pushes herself even closer to me. “I want to stay here and I want you to stay with me.”
I nod. “All right.”
She gazes into my eyes. I stare right back into hers, making sure to hold her tightly because I want her to feel safe.
“Caleb?” she whispers.
“Yes?”
“Thanks.”
“Just doing my job.”
She looks into my eyes again, then shakes her head. “No. It’s more than that. I bet you didn’t sign up to deal with my nightmares.”
No, I didn’t. But I don’t mind being here for her. I want to be here for her. Pushing some hair away from her eyes, I ask, “How long have you been having nightmares?”
“Since my parents died. It used to be worse, but it got better. Lately, it’s been more frequent.”
My eyebrows knit as I think about what happened a few days ago.
When I thought someone was acting suspiciously, but it turned out to be two students running to the dorms. Something woke her up.
I thought I was being too loud, but now I remember the terrified and pained look on her face. She had a nightmare.
“I’m sorry.” I press my lips to her temple. “What can I do for you? ”
“Hold me,” she whispers. “Please just hold me. You make me feel so much better, Caleb, and I know you’re not just doing your job. You care. You care a lot.”
Of course I care. She’s not just my charge. She’s become…well, I don’t know exactly what she’s become, but I would do anything—anything—to protect her.
We remain in each other’s arms, and I try not to think about her warm body pressed against mine. It’s selfish of me to focus on that when she just went through a terrible nightmare. But I can’t exactly help it.
Her breathing has gotten heavy, her chest rising and falling softly. She fell asleep. I gently push some hair away from her cheek, then stroke it with the back of my finger. I’m glad she felt safe enough to go back to sleep. I hope and wish she has a good dream this time.