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Chapter Sixteen

T he elevator doors closed, and that was good, because it stopped him from seeing the hurt in Lexi’s eyes.

He stepped back into the hotel room, closed the door and a quake moved up through his body.

His fist hit the table so hard the plates jumped from the surface, and pain flashed through the wound in his shoulder.

He tipped his head backward and battled the acidic burn behind his eyes.

He swore at the top of his lungs, berating the ceiling and the walls.

And the reason he was punching inanimate objects and swearing a blue streak was because the only alternative would have been to sink to the floor and cry.

He’d known it would be hard. He hadn’t realized just how hard, though. He hadn’t realized that seeing hurt shimmering in her eyes would make him hate himself. He hadn’t expected her to tell him she was falling in love with him.

Was being the operative phrase. He’d ruined it.

But … it would be different, once she realized he was only sending her away for her own safety.

Maybe if he survived this, he could find her again, explain to her that he hadn’t meant the things he’d said.

That he’d hurt her because it was the only way he could be sure she’d go with Darren. Maybe she’d forgive him and understand.

Do you have any idea what you’re throwing away?

Romano closed his eyes and sank slowly into a chair as her words came back to him in that smoky voice, made huskier by pain.

Who the hell was he kidding? He knew it wouldn’t matter if he explained himself.

Lexi knew it, too. She was right. He’d made a choice tonight.

He could have handed that formula over to Darren, taken Lexi and left, like she said.

They could have gone away together. Started over.

But no. He’d chosen to stay here and await his longtime enemy. He’d chosen a man he hated over a woman he …

What?

He didn’t know. Maybe now he’d never find out.

He showered, dressed, re-bandaged his shoulder, and cleaned and loaded his weapons while he waited. He knew the drill. By now Lexi was someplace safe, far from here. By now, this hotel had twenty of the Bureau’s finest in strategic locations to back him up.

But Connor would get a shot at the man who’d taken his family before this night was over.

He tried to picture White’s cold eyes in his mind, but instead he saw Lexi’s. Wide and brown and hurt. Those eyes that healed a man just by looking at him. Those beautiful, sexy, mesmerizing eyes.

He laid the gun down on the dresser, closed his eyes, tried to erase the longing for her that grew stronger with every breath, every second. Was this what the rest of his life would be like? Was killing White worth this?

No.

The answer came to him as clearly and precisely as if it had been spoken aloud. No. It was that simple. White would be apprehended if he showed up tonight. It wouldn’t matter if Connor was in the room or not. What mattered, what really mattered, was Lexi.

He’d made a choice tonight. The wrong choice.

God, he’d thrown away his last chance at redemption. He’d thrown away a woman unlike any other he’d ever known. Or ever would. Lexi had been falling in love with him. And he’d chased her away.

Was he insane?

But it wasn’t over yet. It couldn’t be over. Maybe there was still time to make things right.

He tucked his favorite gun into his waistband before pulling on his jacket. It smelled faintly like Lexi’s hair. The longing stabbed deeper. He quickened his pace, almost ran through the hall to the elevator and then rode it down to the lobby.

The agents sent to back him up were doing an excellent job of concealing their presence. He didn’t see a single face he recognized, nor did anyone look conspicuous.

He headed outside to hail a cab. They backup guys would see him leaving. They’d get the idea. They were skilled enough to be able to handle White on their own. Darren would’ve sent plenty of firepower. He knew what was at stake. One less agent wouldn’t make a difference.

As the hotel faded in the distance behind him, Connor felt lighter, and he couldn’t wipe off his stupid grin. He’d made the right decision. Late, but still…

Tension knotted his stomach as he wondered whether Lexi would forgive him for not making it sooner.

The taxi dropped him off outside the government building he’d worked out of for most of his career. He paid the driver and headed inside, only to run smack into Monroe Stryker, who was hurrying out.

“Damn, why don’t you watch where you’re—” Stryker met Connor’s eyes and stopped in mid-sentence. “Romano. What the hell are you doing here?”

“I know I’m supposed to be at the hotel waiting for White, but I’ve got to see Lexi.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Darren didn’t tell you?” At Stryker’s blank stare, he went on. “I assumed he’d have brought you in on things now that he has the formula.”

Every drop of color left Stryker’s face. “Tell me you’re not talking about the Stoltz case.”

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about. Look, I know you still hold me responsible for Wendy’s death.

I don’t blame you. Hell, I wouldn’t have done this for Darren at all, if the chance to get White hadn’t been a part of it.

But it’s over. I got the damned formula and turned it in.

I did my part. Now I’ve changed my mind about the protective custody for Lexi. I want her back.”

“Protective custody? For Lexia Stoltz? ”

Connor nodded. “I think I finally understand why you hate my guts so much. If you felt a tenth for Wendy what I feel for Lexi … it’s a wonder you didn’t put a bullet between my eyes a long time ago.”

Stryker gaped, then drew a breath. “I did worse than that to you.”

“What?”

He shook his head. “Not now. Look, Romano, you’re telling me you went after Stoltz’s formula at Darren Wade’s request. You turned it over to him, and then you let him take the Dr. Lexia Stoltz into custody?”

“Yeah. For her own protection. I was planning …” Connor swallowed hard. “I was planning to take White out tonight.”

Stryker lowered his head into his hands and swore.

A lead ball formed in Connor’s stomach. “What the hell is going on?”

“Darren Wade doesn’t work for us anymore. For more than a year now, I’ve suspected him of selling information. I’ve been watching him but haven’t been able to get anything solid on him. Not yet anyway.”

“Selling information … to whom?”

“To White.”

The word hit Connor like a blow to the solar plexus.

“I thought you were working with him, Romano. Dammit, you two were best friends. Darren’s the one who recruited you.

So when it looked like he was involved in the bombing that killed Wendy, I assumed you were in on it, too.

Especially since the device was so well made …

and so much like White’s work. Only you knew his methods that well.

And only you had the skill to duplicate them. ”

Connor swore, but Stryker kept talking.

“I figured Wendy knew something, stumbled onto some information she shouldn’t have …” He trailed off, shaking his head.

But Connor wasn’t hearing him anymore. He was replaying that last conversation he’d had with his wife. It caught like a scratched LP, skipping back to the same phrase over and over again. Saw your boss today. Saw your boss today. Saw your boss today.

“No.”

He closed his eyes, gave it a mental kick to make it play out and die away. And then he heard the rest. He was talking to the oddest looking—oh, hey, Justin’s hanging upside down from the monkey bars and hollering at me to come out and see. Gotta go. See you when you get here.

Only she hadn’t. Instead, she’d been killed right before his eyes. Killed because White had planted one of his trademark devices in the house. When he shouldn’t even have known where the house was. When he shouldn’t have known anything about Connor’s family.

So how had he known?

He was talking to the oddest looking …

“It was Darren,” Connor muttered. “Good God, it was Darren all along. Wendy saw him that day, she and the kids ran into him. They said he was with someone odd looking. Had to be White. He and Darren both knew all it would take was one mention of what that stranger looked like for me to put it together …” His head fell until his chin touched his chest. “Those bastards killed my little boys.” He snapped his head up. “Those bastards have Lexi!”

“They also have a virus capable of wiping out entire nations, Romano. We’ll get them.” Stryker was already pulling out his phone, tapping keys.

Connor was reeling, his mind spinning out of control. “I made her go with him. Dammit, she didn’t want to.”

“We’ll have every resource at our disposal on this within ten minutes,” Stryker said. “We’ll get the formula, and we’ll get Lexia Stoltz.” He headed through the doors that led to the street, Connor on his heels. “Park yourself somewhere, Romano. I’ll get in touch as soon as we know anything.”

“The hell I will. I want in on this. And after what you believed, you owe me that much.”

Stryker lowered his gaze, conceding too easily “I owe you a hell of a lot more than that, Romano.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’d like to be alive to close this case,” he said.

“So I’ll explain later. For what it’s worth, Romano, I’m sorry.

” He clapped Connor’s shoulder. “Come on. I’ve got a friend in the CIA who’s been tailing Darren for days.

Had to keep it out of the house, if you get my drift.

And also, you should know your friend Dr. Stoltz has a very worried family trying real hard to track her down. ”

“She doesn’t have any family,” he said as they hurried to Stryker’s car.

“Yeah, she does. Just doesn’t know it yet. You remember Mike Waters?”

“DEA?”

“That’s the one. He’s her brother-in-law. I’ll explain on the way. Come on.”