Page 17 of Howl For A Kiss (Rebellious Mates #3)

FIFTEEN

ELENA

H e's really the Beta of the Silvercrest pack.

She sat frozen against the stone wall, her tactical gear suddenly feeling like a costume in some elaborate charade she'd been too blind to see.

The shock wasn't like Tyler's death—that had been sudden and brutal.

This was worse. This was a slow poison spreading through her veins, tainting every memory of the past three days.

Every gentle touch, every moment of vulnerability she'd shared, and every second she'd allowed herself to trust this man who'd been lying to her face the entire time.

"You're a Beta," she whispered, her voice barely audible above the crackling fire. "You're everything I've been fighting against."

Damon remained kneeling beside her, his hands stilled on the bandage around her thigh. The cloth wrapped around his waist did nothing to diminish his imposing presence and the undeniable authority that radiated from him like heat from the flames.

How had she missed it? The way he carried himself, the tactical knowledge that went far beyond any rebel fighter, and the intimate understanding of pack laws and Council structures.

Because you were a fool. Because you let yourself believe in fairy tales.

"Elena—"

"Don't." The word came out sharp. "Just... don't."

Her mind raced through every interaction and every conversation, reframing them through this devastating new lens.

His evasiveness about his past, his reluctance to share personal details, and the way he'd deflected her questions about his life at Silvercrest territory.

She'd thought it was loyalty to his rebel group, maybe some inter-territorial rivalry. She'd been so pathetically naive.

He played you like a violin.

The hurt was building now, a tidal wave of betrayal and rage that made her chest tight and her vision blur.

This wasn't just about the lies—though those cut deep enough.

This was about trust. About the fact that while she'd been breaking down her walls, exposing her fears and vulnerabilities, he'd been calculating exactly how to manipulate her.

"Three days," she said, her voice growing stronger with each word. "Three days you've been lying to my face. Watching me make a complete fool of myself. Watching me promote you to second-in-command. Watching me trust you with my life."

Damon's jaw tightened, guilt flickering across his angular features. "It wasn't like that."

"Wasn't it?" Elena's hands clenched into fists, her nails digging into her palms. "Then what was it like, Beta Gray ? Were you gathering intelligence? Reporting back about the rebel operations? Or was this all just some sick game to you?"

"Elena, listen to me?—"

"Listen to what? More lies?" The dam burst then, fury flooding through her system like molten lava.

"You knew exactly what you were doing. You knew I'd never have trusted you if I knew who you really were.

So you played the part of the mysterious rebel fighter and let me believe you were one of us. "

She thought of their passionate kiss that morning, and the way her heart had raced when he'd looked at her like she hung the moon. The way she'd fantasized about him in the shower, and imagining a future with someone who understood her cause, someone who believed in what she was fighting for.

He's the enemy. He's literally the embodiment of everything you hate.

"You're pack leadership," she continued, her voice rising with each word. "You enforce the very laws that destroyed my sister's life. You're part of the system that treats hybrids like abominations. And all this time, you've been pretending to care about our cause?"

The betrayal was so complete and so devastating that Elena felt something fundamental break inside her chest. This wasn't just professional deception—this was personal.

This was the man she'd been falling for, the man who'd seen her at her most vulnerable, who'd held her while she cried, and kissed her with enough passion to make her believe in possibilities beyond her rebellion.

All lies. Every single moment.

"You watched me break down about my father's lies," she said, her voice shaking with barely contained rage. "You comforted me about discovering I'm a hybrid. And the whole time, you were lying to me just as completely. You're no better than him."

That seemed to hit its mark. Damon flinched as if she'd struck him, his green eyes flashing with something that looked like genuine pain. But Elena was beyond caring about his feelings.

"Get away from me." The words came out low and deadly, filled with enough venom to poison the air between them.

When he didn't immediately move, something snapped inside her completely.

The first blow caught him across the cheek, her palm connecting with his angular jaw with a sharp crack that echoed through the cavern. He absorbed it without moving, his eyes closing as if he'd expected it, as if he'd been bracing for this exact moment.

"You bastard!" The words tore from Elena's throat as she struck him again, her fists pounding against his chest, his shoulders, anywhere she could reach. "You lying, manipulative bastard!"

Tears streamed down her face now, hot and bitter, carrying with them every ounce of pain and humiliation she'd ever felt. Every moment of being unwanted, unworthy, and different. Every time she'd been discarded or betrayed or made to feel less than enough.

"I trusted you!" she screamed, her voice breaking as she continued hitting him. "I let you in! I let myself believe?—"

But Damon just knelt there, taking every blow without resistance, his face a mask of guilt and self-recrimination that only made her angrier. He wasn't even fighting back, wasn't even defending himself, and somehow that made everything worse.

He knew this was coming. He's been preparing for this moment for three days.

The realization sent another wave of fury through her, and she struck him harder, her fists connecting with his muscled chest and arms with enough force to leave red marks. But physical pain wasn't enough. Nothing would ever be enough to match the devastation he'd caused.

Finally, when her arms grew tired and her sobs threatened to choke her, Elena collapsed back against the cavern wall, her whole body shaking with the force of her emotions.

Damon slowly stood, his skin marked with red welts where her fists had connected and took several steps back to give her space.

The guilt and shame written across his features was unmistakable, but Elena was too consumed by her own pain to find any satisfaction in it.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, his voice rough with emotion. "Elena, I am so fucking sorry."

But sorry wasn't enough. Sorry would never be enough to undo the damage he'd done to her heart.

Damon retreated to the opposite corner of the cavern, giving her the space she'd demanded. He didn't say another word, didn't try to defend himself or explain further. He simply settled against the stone wall with that infuriating silent intensity that made Elena want to scream all over again.

Elena tried to sleep by the small fire, wrapping herself in her tactical jacket.

She wanted nothing more than to shut down her emotions, to build her walls back up, and push this betrayal into the same dark corner where she kept all her other hurts.

It was what she'd always done—survive by feeling nothing.

But sleep wouldn't come. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw the guilt written across Damon's angular features and heard the rough sincerity in his voice when he'd said he was sorry. Her wolf prowled restlessly inside her mind, refusing to let her retreat into emotional numbness.

Fix this, her wolf demanded. Fix this now.

Elena squeezed her eyes shut tighter, trying to ignore the persistent voice. There's nothing to fix. He lied to me. He betrayed me. End of story.

You're missing something, her wolf insisted, pacing back and forth like a caged animal. Missing something important.

I don't want to think about it, Elena shot back mentally. I didn't break this. This isn't my fault. I did nothing wrong. Damon's the bad guy here, not me.

But her wolf wouldn't be silenced. The primal part of her that had recognized something essential in Damon refused to accept such a simple explanation. There were layers to this betrayal, complexities her rational mind was too hurt to examine.

Elena shifted restlessly on the hard ground, her wounded thigh throbbing in rhythm with her heartbeat.

The fire crackled softly, casting shadows on the cavern walls, but sleep remained elusive.

Her emotions were a storm inside her—rage and hurt and confusion all tangled together until she couldn't tell where one ended and another began.

Hours passed before she finally gave up the pretense of sleep. When she opened her eyes, she found Damon exactly in the same position, still awake and still watching over her with that silent vigilance that had become his trademark over the past three days.

Even after everything she'd done to him tonight, every cruel word and physical blow she'd delivered, he was still protecting her. He was still positioned between her and the mouth of the cavern and still alert for any sign of danger.

Why?

The question burned in her throat as she sat up, studying him in the firelight. Even in his crude clothing from scraps found in the cavern, he still looked every inch the powerful Beta he was. Authority radiated from him even in this reduced state.

"Why are you still watching over me?" The words escaped before she could stop them, cutting through the tense silence.

Damon's eyes met hers across the fire. "Because it's what you deserve."

"I just beat the hell out of you." Elena's voice came out hoarser than she'd intended. "I said horrible things. Why aren't you angry? Why aren't you defending yourself?"

"Because I deserved everything you did to me." His response was immediate and unwavering. "All your rage and all your pain. I'd take that beating again if I had to."

Elena stared at him, searching his face for any sign of deception. But there was only that steady sincerity that had drawn her to him from the beginning, and the unwavering strength that made her feel safe even when her world was falling apart.

"Why did you lie?" The question tore from her throat like a physical wound. "Why did you feel the need to stay here with me? You could have just walked away after that first day. Gone back to your pack and your real life."

Damon was quiet for so long she thought he wouldn't answer. When he finally spoke, his voice was thick with emotion. "Because you're my fated mate, Elena."

Elena's breath caught in her throat, her heart stuttering against her ribs. "What?"

"I couldn't walk away from you." Damon's green eyes burned with intensity in the firelight. "From the moment I touched your hand, I knew. My wolf recognized you instantly. You're mine, Elena."

"So you orchestrated this whole charade?" Elena's voice climbed higher, panic and disbelief warring in her chest. "You manipulated me into trusting you?"

"Yes." The admission was stark and unflinching. "I knew you'd never let me stay if you knew I was a Beta. But I couldn't leave you. I couldn't walk away from my mate."

Elena's rational mind reeled from this revelation, but something deeper—something primal and true—sang with recognition. Her wolf wasn't surprised by this news. If anything, she seemed relieved that the truth had finally been spoken aloud.

You knew, Elena realized with dawning horror. Deep down, you knew all along.

The memory of their first handshake came flooding back—the electric jolt that had run through her system and the way her body had responded to his presence. The inexplicable trust, and the way she'd felt safe with him despite every logical reason to be wary.

Even now, after discovering his deception, part of her still felt that bone-deep recognition. That sense of rightness when he was near, and of completion she'd never experienced before.

You may feel terrible that he lied to you, her wolf observed. But what choice did he have? What choice did you give him?

The realization hit Elena like ice water. Her wolf was right—she would have cast him out immediately if she'd known he was a Beta. Would have seen him as the enemy. She might very well be dead right now or still trapped in her compromised rebel base without his protection.

Every action he'd taken, every lie he'd told, had been motivated by one driving need. To protect her. And he could only do that by staying close enough to keep her safe.

"You had no choice but to lie," Elena whispered.

Damon's eyes widened slightly, hope flickering across his features. "Elena?—"

"You knew I'd never accept you as my mate if I knew the truth." She was talking to herself now, working through the logic that her emotions had refused to acknowledge. "So you did what you had to do to stay close to me."

The foundation of her hurt began to crack, replaced by something far more complicated and terrifying. Understanding. And beneath that, the growing awareness that despite everything—his lies, his deception, his betrayal—she didn't want him to leave.