Page 31 of Hollow Valley

Stella

To break the monotony, we sang as we walked.It also helped to distract Fae from crying, as she had been doing since she realized that we left the cabin without her friend Juniper.I had tried to explain that Juniper and her family were going somewhere else, but I don’t know how much she could understand except that someone she loved wasn’t there anymore.

Leandro started first, singing something low and mournful.I didn’t know it, but Ryder, Edie, and Boden joined in, explaining that it was a song by Tracy Chapman.Boden crooned Stone Temple Pilots, and Edie belted out a Cher song.But Alphie sang one that none of the rest of us knew.A melodic folk song about living with the dead, and while she hadn’t exactly needed to explain it, she said she’d learned it from the Revvers.

We hiked longer than we usually would without a break.Part of it was that we didn’t need to slow to accommodate Juniper’s tiny legs, but the other part of it, I think, was because we wanted to put what had happened in the cabin behind us.So we sang, and we walked.

It had been less than a week since we left the Barbarabelle, and we’d already lost three people, including a child.

And it happened because of me.

By midday, the forest opened up to a patch of sun-warmed clearing, and we stopped for a break.As I took a seat on a fallen log, my mind spun with guilt and questions.When Boden left to fill the canteens with water, I jumped at the chance to talk with him alone.

“Can I tag along and lend a hand?”I asked.

“Sure,” he said, sounding a little taken aback by my eagerness.

I looked over at where Fergus was helping Fae chase a yellow Canadian Tiger Swallowtail (Papilio canadensis).“Can you keep an eye on Fae for me?I’ll be right back.”

“Sure, no bother at all,” Fergus said with an easy grin.

When we were far enough away from the others that no one could hear us, Boden asked, “Is there something you wanted to talk about?”

“It was my fault,” I blurted out.

“You mean because you weren’t at the cabin to still the zombies?”he asked.

“No.”I stopped and looked up at him.“I was dreaming of Max, and I didn’t realize it, but I did it again.Like back at the shed next to the mine.”I glanced around, in case others were nearby, and tears stung my eyes.“Isummonedthem.With my stupid pheromones.I didn’t mean to, but I did, and it’s all my fault what happened to Oakley and Juniper and Sienna.”

“Oh, no, kiddo.”He pulled me into his arms and hugged me to him, letting me cry into his chest.“It’s not your fault.It’s chaos and it’s the virus, and none of it is your fault.”

“No, but it is,” I insisted through my tears.“I’m a danger to everyone here every time I fall asleep!I can’t control it.”

Boden held me a moment longer.“You’re not alone with this,” he murmured.“We’ll figure it out.Maybe we adjust things to keep you safe, keepeveryonesafe.”

“Adjust what?”I asked after he released me.

“The only time you can’t control what you communicate to the zombies is when you’re sleeping, so let’s change that up,” he elaborated.“We’ll have you sleep earlier in the day, when it’s light and everyone else is awake, so you’re never alone with your dreams.We’ll all be able to watch out for anything, and I can wake you up right away.And at night, someone will always be awake with you, keeping watch, too.”

“What if that doesn’t work?”I asked.“What if the zombies come again and someone gets hurt?”

“I’m not saying it’s fair, but that is generally the risk of being alive right now,” Boden reasoned, and he put a strong hand on my shoulder.“Zombies will always be a threat, no matter what you do or don’t do.”

“Was that meant to be comforting?”I asked.

He gave me a sad smile.“Yeah, it was.”He put an arm around my shoulders, and we started walking to the creek to refill our canteens.“Come on.We should get the water, so you can get to bed early tonight.”

Once we’d collected the water, we headed back, Boden walking a half-step ahead.When we broke through the trees, the others were scattered about resting and murmuring in small knots of conversation.

“Are we about ready then?”Boden asked as we arrived.

Fergus was crouched down in the grass, with Fae attempting to climb him like a tree, and he motioned behind him toward the thicket.“Dougal is out making a donation to the undergrowth,” he said, speaking euphemistically of his brother’s stomach issues.

“I could use a few more minutes,” Ryder said.He was lying on his back in the grass, his fingers laced behind his head, and his jaw was working as if he were chewing on hard jerky.

“We can take all the time you need,” Boden said.“I know it’s been a long day for all of us.”

“Honestly, I think that Fae could use the time to stretch her little limbs,” Edie remarked with a laugh as she watched my daughter scramble all over Fergus.