Page 11 of Hitched at Randy’s (Diner Days)
Eleven
Cam
“ W e should go out tonight,” Evan tells me.
“Really? What did you have in mind?” I was thinking we’d just hang out in my apartment, eat dinner, maybe stream a movie.
“We should hit a club. I feel like dancing and drinking. Just want to let loose for a night and not think.”
“That a good idea? Last time we got drunk, we, uh …” I hold up my left hand with his class ring still on it, and Evan laughs. I don’t know why I’m still wearing the ring, but he also hasn’t asked for it back.
“I think it’s a great idea. Come on, Cam. We’ll take it easy on the drinks, but I just want to blow off some steam.”
“Fine, yeah. I know a place. Just gimme a few minutes to get ready.” I stand up from the couch, and Evan grabs his bag, going through his options as I head for my closet. I pull out a pair of snug dark wash jeans and a silky short sleeve button-down black shirt. I strip off the shorts I was wearing and step into the jeans. By the time I’m dressed and fix my hair, Evan is ready and sitting on the couch tapping his foot as he waits. He stands up, and I get a better look at his outfit. Evan is wearing jeans like me and while his aren’t quite as tight, they still hug his hips in just the right way. He left the buttons undone on the polo shirt he’s wearing, showing just a bit of his chest. My heart beats faster, and I do my best to ignore it. We’re going out to dance and have a night off from thinking. Not as a date or something. Evan just got out of a long-term relationship with a girl. “Ready?” I ask.
“Yup,” Evan follows me out to the car, taking his seat on the passenger side. I take a deep breath, inhaling Evan’s cologne in the process. Smelling the mixture of cloves, cinnamon, and something woodsy. Instead of easing my tension, it only makes me worse. Somehow I’ll get through the night without doing something stupid, like trying to kiss him. Luckily, I don’t have to drive far before I’m pulling into the parking lot for my favorite club. It’s not specifically a queer club, but there tends to be a decent mix of people here most nights.
“Bar first,” Evan says when we get inside. He waves down the bartender and screams over the noise. “Two shots of tequila.” He pays for both and shoves one in my direction. “Cheers,” Evan says, clinking his shot glass to mine, and we both shoot it back. The alcohol burns down my throat, and I shake my head, trying to get back my sense of taste.
“Are we dancing now?” I ask.
Evan looks me over before he turns to look at the crowd. I follow his gaze, looking over the dance floor. The place isn’t packed this early, but there’s a decent amount of people dancing to the fast-paced music. I grab Evan’s wrist and pull him out to an empty spot. The music sweeps over us, and I move my hips to the beat, dancing along as I throw my arms around Evan’s neck. He’s looking at me as he follows my movements, trying to keep up.
I spin around with my ass to Evan’s crotch and find myself face to face with a man. He looks roughly our age, but his muscles are popping out of the tight tank top he has on. He meets my eyes with an up-nod, silently asking if I want to dance. He’s not my usual type, and I’m not ready to leave Evan. I hold up my hand and his eyes zero in on the ring on my finger. “Oh,” his lips form the word, but I can’t hear him over the music. He turns and heads to a different part of the club, and that’s when I feel Evan’s hands on my hips.
He pulls me closer, whispering in my ear. “What was that?”
“Nothing, just a guy looking for a dance. Doubt I’ll get many offers with this ring on my finger,” I say.
Evan pushes my hips, turning me around. “Then dance with me.” His eyes meet mine, and I almost think there’s more to his offer. I’m leaning closer before I can overthink it.
“Evan,” my words are cut off as he presses his lips to mine. His tongue is quick to follow, licking at my lips and asking for entrance. I’ve barely processed what’s happened when I remember to pull back. “Wait, I thought you were straight.”
Evan laughs. “Cam, I’m bi. I’ve known I’m bi since college.” That’s all I need to hear. I wrap my arms around Evan’s neck, pulling him in for another kiss. His tongue chases mine for a moment before he pulls back. “We probably shouldn’t,” he says. “I just got out of a relationship.”
I’m staring into his blue-gray eyes, trying to hold myself back. “It doesn’t have to mean something.” I don't think I even believe that.
“We’re married,” Evan grabs my hand, holding it up to show off the ring. I know he’s right, but I also don’t want to listen to reason. I’d rather be kissing Evan, no matter how much of a bad idea it is.
“Fine,” I yell over the music. “Dance with me?” Maybe kissing is off the table, but that doesn’t mean I can’t tease both of us with some grinding. I move my hips along with the rhythm, rubbing my ass into Evan’s crotch. His hands go to my hips again, but his touch seems unsure, looser than it was before.
“I need another drink,” he tells me. I wave him on, staying on the dance floor as he walks to the bar. As the driver, I don’t want to get too messed up tonight. We need to get home safely. Not to mention it’ll be better if one of us is sober enough to remember why it’s a bad idea for us to kiss. Even mostly sober, it’s a hard concept to grasp. That couple of moments when his mouth was on mine was more of a tease than a relief from the sexual tension between us.
Evan returns with a beer in his hand and tilts the bottle up to take a drink. We dance, but this time our bodies don’t touch. We’re dancing near each other, keeping our distance to a respectful space. Evan sips on his beer and slowly the space between us gets smaller and smaller, until his hands go on my hips again, pulling me to him and pressing his crotch to mine. “Evan,” I say his name.
He licks his lips as he looks me over. “Cam.”
“We should call it a night. It’s getting late,” I try a different approach.
“Fine,” he agrees. Evan follows me through the club, and we weave our way to the exit. The one drink I had is out of my system, but the couple of beers Evan had are apparent as he flops down in the passenger seat.
“You okay?” I ask. “Not feeling like puking or anything, right?”
“I’m fine,” he slurs. His head wobbles slightly, but we don’t talk on the way back.
“Cam, what am I gonna do?” Evan asks.
“Come on, let’s get you to bed,” I say when I put the car in park.
“No, not tonight. Vi wants me to move out. I’m gonna have to find a new place to live.”
“Don’t think about that right now,” I tell him. It’s better than offering for him to move in here. There’s only so long the two of us can keep sharing my bed. Fuck. My bed. How am I supposed to think clearly after that kiss when we’re pressed up against each other and half awake? “Maybe I should take the couch.”
“No,” Evan says, grabbing my wrist. “Stay with me. Please?” He looks at me with those puppy dog eyes, and I know I can’t refuse.
“Okay, you get in bed, and I’ll be right in after I use the bathroom.” I lead Evan to my room, and he kicks off his shoes, not bothering to further undress as he flops down on the bed. I head for the restroom, steadying my hands on the edge of the sink and letting the coldness of it reassure me. One deep breath. Evan is drunk. Tipsy at the very best. As the sober one, it’s up to me to be the responsible person and remember just why it’d be a bad idea to kiss him again. Nothing can come of it. We’re getting divorced, and sex would only complicate things.
When I walk into the bedroom again, Evan is already asleep, his head resting on the pillow as he softly snores. I let out a soft sigh. “Goodnight, Evan,” I say as I turn off the light and strip down to my boxers. Crawling into bed next to him, I think again about what Evan said earlier. He’s going to have to find a new place to live, and maybe it’s not right for me to offer he stay here, but would it be terrible to hope he moves back to Boston? I know we can’t stay married, but it’d still be nice to be closer to my best friend again. With Viola out of the picture, what other reason does he have to stay in California? All of these questions are probably better left for never.
I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts and focus on falling asleep. Nothing is going to change tonight. Even if kissing Evan felt special. Like maybe something could’ve come of it. But how did I not know until now that Evan is bi? He’s never said anything about being with a guy. The only person I remember him telling me about in college was Viola, but maybe there’s a reason he didn’t tell me. I had a lot on my plate back then with transitioning and getting through my own classes with passing grades. I guess it doesn’t change anything now, but it’s still good to know that Evan truly sees me as a guy and doesn’t have an issue with being with a guy. He just has an issue with kissing me because it’s complicated, and I get that, but it doesn’t make things any easier.