Page 39 of Heart

“Not literally, figuratively.The Foolcan be interpreted several ways.”

“Maybe I’m the fool, listening to all this mumbo jumbo.”

“I’m serious, sweetie. Just be aware. Watch for things. I may have not done readings for a while, but I used to be really good when I was in college.”

“So, you were a business major... with a minor in astrology?”

“No. Poli sci. Go figure.”

The bell from the front door jingled. “Buongiorno!” Mikey said.

Here we go. He’s here, Miss Cleo’s making predictions, I’m not sure how I feel, and I need to talk to him about it... alone.

“We’re in back, Mikey.”

Mikey came through the kitchen door. “Hey, everyone. What’s cooking?”

They laughed. Mikey was unaware that it was more from residual speculation of the card reading than his innocuous attempt at kitchen humor.

“Not much... yet,” said George. “We’re prepping for the soft opening on Wednesday. It’s invitation-only, and you’re invited.”

“Oh, wow,” he said, eyes large. “I’ve never been invited to something as fancy as a restaurant opening before. I don’t know what to say.”

“That you wouldn’t miss it for the world,” May said. “And that you can’t wait to come and hang out with us.”

Mikey was flustered. “OK, yeah—all of that. But, uh, how does it work? Do I bring a date or something?”

“You can. You have a plus-one if you need it. No worries.” But even as he said it, George felt disappointed.

Wait. What? Why?

Mikey chuckled. “Of course, I don’t have one. But Tuesdays are my night out. Maybe I’ll get lucky.”

“I have no doubt you will, Mikey,” May said. “It’s just a matter of time before someone wises up to your charm.”

“Yeah, whatever,” he said, waving her off. “I quit telling myself that long ago. But if I strike out tomorrow, I’ll be calling you again, George. I may need another slap-happy, spank-the-monkey session between us guys, you know... to take the edge off.”

The room went deafeningly silent. Zac looked up, paring knife in one hand, apple in the other.

“I KNEW IT!” said May. “Iknewyou got some this weekend, Georgie Porgy. And with Mikey, no less. THAT’S AWESOME!”

George’s face went three progressive shades of scarlet.

Mikey had been smiling, oblivious, but seeing George’s discomfort, he soon realized his mistake. His face slackened. “Oh, no. Oh, man. I’m such a doof, George. Sometimes my mouth moves before my brain kicks in. I... I should have spoken with you first. God, I’m such a loser.”

“It’s OK, Mikey,” George said, returning to the parsnips. “We’re all friends here.”

“I’m so sorry. I have a habit of putting my foot in my mouth. Ma says I do it all the time. I should have known better.”

“It’s all good. Really. I was wondering how to broach the subject and... now I don’t have to. Like you said, we were just two guys helping each other out.”

Mikey removed his cap. He ran his fingers through his hair.

“So, youdidget laid,” May said, gathering the cards. “How can you deny my abilities?”

George pointed a wooden spoon at Zac. “Cover your ears.” Then to May, he said, “Mutual masturbation on the phone is not the same thing as having sex.”

“Now you sound like Bill Clinton. First denying, then redefining.”