Page 35 of Healer’s Reckoning (The Healer’s #3)

Chapt er 35

Ava

“Don’t worry about me. Remember all those guys with guns?”

She doesn’t look any less worried. “How’s your brother?”

Guilt descends over me immediately. “He’s okay.” It’s silent for a moment, and then I feel Rose’s hand squeeze mine.

“It’s not your fault that they’re gone.” She says the words so softly, but I hear them loud and clear. She squeezes my hand once again. “It’s not.” She pulls her hand back. “But you obviously feel like it is.”

I don’t bother arguing with her. “My brother is alive. Cade and Amber aren’t.” My words are a whisper. “Paige doesn’t have a mom and dad, but my brother is alive. How do I make sense of that? How do I feel happy he’s alive when it cost so much? It cost Paige everything.” I didn’t mean to say that much; the words just sort of tumble out.

“Is it fair that Cade and Amber are gone? No, it’s not.” Her words are like a dagger to my heart. “But it’s also not fair that you lost your brother two years ago and didn’t even know he was alive all this time. It’s not fair what they did to him. Cade and Amber are gone, but that doesn’t mean we can’t rejoice that your brother is back. He’s alive, Ava. That’s so good.”

Tears prick my eyes. “It doesn’t feel good; I don’t feel like I should be happy.”

“Oh, Ava. There are such awful things in this world. We all testified to that today, but if you dwell on the bad, there’s no hope for the future. Ask me; I know. I used to live that way. We have to choose to celebrate the good. Ava, your brother is alive. Celebrate it. You can be sad that Amber and Cade are gone and still be happy that you have your brother back. They’re not mutually exclusive.” She smiles softly. “Besides, I want to meet him someday. I mean this is the brother you used to follow right?”

I smile for the first time in what feels like ages. I remember the night Rose and I snuck out and followed Maverick. I remember telling her that night that I was used to sneaking around at night, following my brother. “Yes.”

“Is he anything like you?” she asks.

My smile slips. “Well, he didn’t use to be. I don’t know anymore.”

“What was he like before?” she asks quietly.

I take a breath. “He was the life of any party. He had a huge smile, and everybody loved him. He was never serious and was always goofing around and was a party animal.”

“Hence the following him,” she says.

I nod. “Yeah. He was a good kid, but he loved partying way more than he loved doing school.”

“Sounds like a typical boy.”

I nod again. “Yeah.”

“And he was a huge tease. He made fun of me all the time.” I smile at the memories.

Rose squeezes my hand. “I can’t wait to meet him.”

I consider her. “I don’t know if he’ll ever be normal, Rose. He’s...dangerous right now.”

She shrugs. “Then I’ll wait until he’s not.”

I swallow hard. “Thank you.”

Maverick comes over to her then and hands her Paige. “She’s hungry. I’ll grab a plate.” Rose takes Paige and situates her on her lap.

“What are you hungry for Paigey?”

She deals with Paige for a few minutes, and I take the opportunity to scan the room discreetly. I don’t see Bryce, and I wonder where he’s disappeared to. We didn’t talk about after the funeral. I was so focused on getting here, I never asked about how long we were staying or what the plan was. “He’s behind you,” Rose says without breaking up her conversation with Paige. I turn all the way around in my chair, and there he is...staring right at me. His eyes are intense, and he doesn’t smile.

“I’ll be right back,” I tell Rose. I push in my chair and walk over to him. He scans the room multiple times before his eyes land on me.

“You need to eat,” he says when I get close.

“I will,” I assure him. “Have you eaten yet?”

“I’m good.” He scans the room again and then looks back at me.

“What’s the plan?” I ask, remembering why it was I came over here in the first place. “Are we going back tonight, or...” I let my sentence hang.

He glances around the room again before his eyes land back on me. “Whatever you want to do. If you want to go back tonight, we’ll go. If you want to spend a few days here with Rose, we can do that too.”

“If I stay, will all your men stay?” I ask. He nods, and I frown. “I’m not going to keep them all away from their families.”

“Don’t worry about my men.” His words are almost harsh. “They do whatever I tell them to do.” My eyebrows rise, but I don’t say anything. He’s so intense, it’s a little terrifying. “Your friends are here.” I turn around and see the Northwoods Pack making their way into the dining area. Garrett and Emma lead the way, followed by Liam and Talya, Paul and Sage, Kyle and Madison, and Max and Raechel. They’re all pretty subdued, for them anyway. The girls migrate over to Rose, and I give them time to give her their love. Raechel looks over at me and waves me over. I wander over to them and am given warm hugs from all of them. Thankfully, nobody asks about what happened with the attack. They either don’t know or are being gracious in not bringing it up right now, for which I’m grateful. I want them to focus on Rose, not me.

“Hey, Stranger,” I hear a familiar voice behind me say.

I turn around and smile. Samantha and Wyatt are here. “Hey.”

She gives me a warm hug. “How are you?”

“Good,” I say and then step back so she can talk to Rose. I end up backing away from the table and end up next to Wyatt. “Hey, Wyatt.”

He gives me an easy smile. “Hey, Ava.”

“Can I ask you a question?” I ask suddenly.

He frowns just the slightest bit. “Will it cause the alpha over in the corner glaring at me to get upset?”

“Um, no. I don’t think so.”

“Then go ahead. Ask away.”

"I don’t know how to ask this exactly, but it’s about Bryce.” I’m hoping that with enough people around, he can’t hear our conversation. “He’s like really,” I pause. “Wound tight. I don’t know what to do with him. Sometimes, he’s good and he smiles and everything feels like...okay. But then there’s a lot of time where he doesn’t really smile, and he’s like—”

“Ready to kill everybody around him?” he asks.

“Yeah. I guess that. You’re an alpha too, and you’re the least scary one. So, I thought I'd ask you.” I wasn’t going to ask Maverick; that was for sure. And Garrett was terrifying too.

“Wow, thanks for the compliment.”

My eyes shoot to his. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

“It’s fine,” he says, cutting me off with a smile. “I’m just messing with you. You have to remember that you were taken from him,” he says gently. “Any male wolf losing his mate, knowing she’s in danger,” he blows out a breath. “That makes him incredibly dangerous and unhinged.”

“Yeah, but I’m back now,” I argue.

“Is the threat gone?” he asks.

I sigh. “No. You probably heard that there was an attack.”

He nods. “I did.”

“Still,” I push on. “There’s something going on with him. I just—I don’t know how to help him.”

He studies my face a moment. “How about this? Why don’t you give me some time to observe him. Interact with him as much as you can and let me see if I notice anything, okay?”

I breathe a sigh of relief that he’s taking me seriously. “Thank you.” I reach out to pat his arm, but he moves quickly away with the grace of a shifter.

“I’d rather not die tonight. Thanks, though.” Without another look in my direction, he strides over to Samantha and puts his hand on her back and whispers in her ear. I turn around and see Bryce’s gaze on Wyatt. I start towards him, but Raechel stops me.

“I heard you had an eventful past few days.”

“If you can call being in bed for the past four days eventful, sure,” I respond.

She smiles slowly. “Man, I've missed your snark. Nobody gives it to me like you do, Ava.”

“That’s because they’re all afraid of you,” I respond. She laughs and punches me lightly in the arm.

“So, speaking of being in bed, have you and the alpha done the deed yet?” she asks, eyebrows wiggling.

I shake my head. “You are such a mess.”

“I take that as a no.” She looks over my shoulder, staring boldly at who I’m sure is Bryce. “Yeah, he’s too uptight. It didn’t happen yet.”

I shake my head. “When it does, I’m sure you’ll be the first person we tell.” I say the words deadpan, but she still beams.

“Aw, thank you.”

“Is everything okay between you and him?” She meets my eyes. “In all seriousness.”

My stomach tightens. “Why do you ask?”

She must catch something in my voice, because she studies my face. “What’s going on?”

“I don’t know.”

“You can tell me,” she pushes.

“No, I really don’t know. I, uh, actually talked to Wyatt about it.”

Her eyes show her surprise. “Okay. What did he say?”

“He said he’d watch him and see if he noticed anything.”

She looks over at Bryce again. “All I know is that he just looks scary and like he wants to kill me. What did I do?”

“It’s not you; it’s his new look,” I say, feeling exhausted suddenly.

Max joins us, and I clam up. He is so intimidating. I’m hoping he’ll take Raechel and move on. Raechel, however, has other plans. “Babe, why is Bryce acting so weird?” He doesn’t even blink at Raechel’s question.

“I wouldn’t know.” His words are deep and low and without a hint of emotion.

“He’s been acting really weird around Ava, and we want to know why,” Raechel persists.

“It’s fine,” I insert as I feel my face heat up.

“Want me to go give him a hug and ask him about his feelings?”

Max’s words delivered in that deadpan voice make me laugh, and Raechel grins. “Yes, please. I for one would love to see that.”

He scowls, but then he surprises me by turning to me. “What’s he doing?”

“He’s just so intense. Hunter said he’s not eating, not sleeping. And he’s...I don’t know...not as easy-going, I guess as he used to be.”

“How long’s he known you?” Max asks.

I think a moment. “Over a year.”

“Long time to know your mate and not be mated.” Max’s words sink in. “Add to that you being taken from him.” His eyes meet mine. “More than once. He’s probably fighting for control.”

“Oh.”

“You ever push him away?” Max asks suddenly.

My eyes shoot to his. “What?”

“He ever touch you, and you push him away?”

I flinch. “No, I haven’t done that. I wouldn’t—” But even as I say the words, I think about the few times he’s touched me and I’ve reacted. I look at the two of them. “I mean, sometimes it startles me, or like I jerk...maybe. I don’t mean to.” I feel terrible.

“Probably thinks you’re rejecting him and his wolf.”

“I’m not!” I whisper in shock. He stares down at me but doesn’t say anything else. I look at Raechel, who has sympathy in her eyes. “I didn’t mean to.”

“I know, Girl. I get it; really, I do. Just talk to him. That’s all. Just clear the air between you.” She squeezes my hand. “It’s going to be okay; it will all work out. I promise.”

“Thanks, Guys,” I whisper. “I’m going to run to the bathroom.” Raechel looks like she wants to object, but I turn and walk away. I don’t look at Bryce as I walk out of the room.