Page 24 of Griffin (Stone Brothers #5)

TWENTY-TWO

SHAY

I nibbled the grapes I brought along with my lunch.

I never got to finish my sandwich, and I was still hungry.

Colt had put on his tool belt to join the team since they were now down three men.

I was glad to have the office to myself.

I'd embarrassed myself with the minor meltdown earlier, but having two angry men literally wrestling at my feet during lunch break made me snap.

I'd been in a stunned state, a mix of sorrow and rage, all morning after hearing Annie's story.

Tate had had nothing to do with her terrible tragedy, but somehow, the whole thing made me hate my husband even more.

He was part of that group of monstrous people who intimidated and bullied and hurt others.

He was part of that group of people who had no remorse about being a horrible human.

He was part of that group of people who really had no right to walk the planet with the rest of us.

Annie's story and warnings had made me more determined than ever to get away from Tate.

I'd spent my coffee break researching local divorce lawyers, and I glanced around at rental listings in the area to see if there was any way I could afford a place on my own.

There were a few options with reasonable rents, but it meant living with a roommate.

I would never bring a stranger into my life.

At least not until I was sure Tate was gone for good.

I came with too much baggage, and it wouldn't be fair to a roommate.

Just like it wasn't fair to Griffin. Today, he'd learned that underneath the layers, I was a fucking emotional mess.

It was so easy to smile and enjoy life when Tate was gone, but the reality was his menacing presence was always there, waiting to wipe away all smiles and joy.

My phone buzzed with a news flash. I pulled out a few more grapes and nibbled them as I picked up the phone.

It was breaking news about Roxi Carhill, the influencer.

Her body had been found in shrubs just off the highway.

Police were focusing on her ex-boyfriend, Toby Barron.

I put down the phone. It was shocking to read and, at the same time, not the least bit surprising.

Toby had basically piggy-backed onto Roxi's fame.

She'd started out on her own, and their romance became a hot topic and earned them more followers.

And now, he'd been cast aside. He obviously couldn't handle the blow to his male ego, so he killed her.

It was a textbook case really, and I was sure it wouldn't be long before they arrested him.

For the rest of the day, I managed to dig into my work enough to push aside some of the emotional turmoil of the morning.

I wrote up purchase orders, paid vendors and made delivery scheduling calls.

I was proud at how quickly I'd learned the ropes of my new job.

That newfound confidence, that feeling that I was ready to meet my problems head-on and find my way out of my bottomless hole was starting to show in everything I did.

I'd even signed up for ballet classes with Jules' old teacher, Miss Pearl.

My determination to make my fulfilling and independent half-life a full-time life was growing each day.

As I stacked on new thoughts of how I'd accomplish this dream, one niggling thing kept poking at me.

I needed to talk to Griffin. I needed some space.

It'd be hard and heartbreaking, but for now, I needed to find my way to freedom alone.

I couldn't rely on someone else. It wasn't fair to him, and it wasn't the full win I dreamt of.

* * *

Colt and I were in the office finishing up paperwork as the men started heading toward the lockers.

"Shay, I just want to say you're doing a great job.

" He put down the papers he was holding and looked at me.

It was easy to see where Griffin got his incredible looks.

Colt was just as spectacular but with a little more wear and tear and some nice wisps of gray.

"I'll be honest, I know about you and Griffin and I'm—" He paused to find words but I filled them in for him.

"Griffin mentioned that the family didn't keep secrets from each other, so I figured you'd know.

By the way, I met your daughter, Jules, and all the cousins on Saturday night, and I'm so envious.

What a great group of people, and as far as this thing with Griffin and me—I'm not going to lie.

He is amazing and sweet and kind and all the things a woman could dream of.

" I decided to leave out the mind-blowing sex part and the protectiveness that had already melted my heart multiple times.

"I'm going to talk with Griffin today. I have some things in my personal life that need to be changed, drastically, and I don't want to pull Griffin through that sticky tar with me. "

Colt nodded. "I understand, and I'm sure Fin will, too. But anything we can do to help."

"Thanks. I think I'm going to try to handle it on my own, but it's nice knowing I've got a couple of Stones behind me if I need them."

"You sure do."

I finished up at my desk and gathered my things. "See you tomorrow, Colt."

"See you tomorrow, and sorry about that fight at lunch. Those guys are gone now."

I nodded and headed out the door. Griffin was just coming out of the locker trailer.

He was wearing the grit and sweat of the day on his face, and I marveled at how fucking good it made him look.

I wanted nothing more than to run to him, jump into his arms and beg him to take me home to his bed.

I could still feel his hands and mouth on me.

Giving that intimacy up was going to be really hard, but it was for the best. I needed my head clear for these next steps in my life.

I'd hoped to get to my car and drive off the site before seeing him.

I wasn't quite ready to talk to him, but seeing him now, looking so breathtaking and already so familiar, I knew I had to get "the talk" over with.

I was sure I'd regret it big time, but this head-spinning relationship was too much for me right now.

I needed feet firmly on the ground and my wits about me, so I could come out of this unscathed.

I hoped Griffin would stick around for me to come out the other side, but I wouldn't blame him if he didn't. It seemed, in a convoluted way, Tate had managed to wreck my life yet again.

"I'll walk you to your car," he said.

I smiled and we both walked silently to my car. I set my stuff on the passenger seat and turned toward him.

His eyes were like green jewels in the late afternoon sun. "Uh-oh, I see something coming my way, something that I'm not going to like."

"How the hell do you read me so well?" I asked.

"I have a big task in front of me. I need to cleave off a very disagreeable husband.

It will be hard and nerve-wracking, but it has to be done, for my sanity, for my safety and, mostly, for my happiness.

Being with you has shown me just how much I've been missing. "

"But having me in your life right now is the last thing you need." The hurt in his expression pushed against my chest.

I reached for his hand. To have such an incredible man take an interest in me was hard for me to believe.

"I just need to do this. I need to break free first, then I hope you'll be there to catch me, to hold me.

But I'll understand completely if you aren't. You're the first bright spot I've had in my life in years.

You and this job. But I need to erase all the dark smudges first. You've helped me see that I can't go on like this, just waiting for those days when Tate is out on the road.

I want a hundred percent life, a life where I'm not always waiting and worrying that soon my horrid husband will be home and everything will be turned upside down again. "

Griffin held my hand and tugged me a little closer, but he didn't take me into his arms. It was for the best because being in his arms always turned me into a hot, dizzy mess. "Hey, ballerina, I've already decided I need you in my life. I hope, someday, you'll need me in yours too."

His words made my chest ache. I nodded and fought back tears. "Thanks for making this easy, Fin. I've been fretting over it, but now, I remember that this time I've picked a reasonable, sane man."

"I'd kiss you goodbye, but you know how we get when our mouths come together. Next thing we know, clothes are flying in every direction, and well, you know, you were there for the last few incidents."

I laughed and pressed my hand against the side of his face.

He reached up and held my palm there for a few moments.

I turned to climb in my car. He stood there and watched me drive off, and as hard as I tried to convince myself to look away, I glanced up in my rearview a few times and he was still watching me.