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CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR

Emerson

I know that every year on this day, Liz will lay around all day mourning. I know that she will need space. I know to have the freezer stocked with ice cream and the refrigerator with wine.

I also know that Gran will be very present on this day, making soup or whatever it is she feels may be soothing and I know that she will give Liz, Kelton, and even their father a pass on this day.

She won’t hound them or sass them in any form, but she will be one hundred and ten percent supportive of whatever it is they may be feeling.

She will not question their process but accept it.

The anniversary of their mother’s death will never be an easy day.

She played such a huge role in their lives and not just because she was their mother. She was always their biggest supporter. They were her everything and in turn she was theirs.

What I didn’t know was how Kelton handled the day. I didn’t know if he preferred to be alone or if he needed a shoulder or an ear. I didn’t want to overstep but I also didn’t want to appear uncaring.

I’m at a complete loss.

When I hear a knock on the door, I hurry to let Gran in and help take some of the items weighing down her arms.

“How is she?”

“Shower,” I say, moving over and placing the bags on the counter.

“And Kelton?”

When I lift my gaze and find her watching, I feel like an ass instantly.

“He’s the exact opposite of Liz in this situation.” Granny June places her hand over mine. “He loves to talk about her. Sharing stories, it’s hard on him, it is, but he gets through it by remembering.”

“I wasn’t sure and I didn’t want to be a bother to him on a day when he’d preferred to be left alone.”

“What I can tell you is that even if that man wanted to be left alone, that would almost always exclude you. He’s told me himself how you managed to make everything feel better.”

My chest tightens at her words.

“So let me fuss with all this, and you go give him a call.” She nudges me along. “Make it a video chat.” With a wink from her I make my way to my room and close the door. Making sure I don’t look a mess I take her advice and make that call.

He answers and I can tell he is outside sitting near the pool. What kills me the most is the red rimmed eyes and two-day old stubble. I just want to reach through the phone, grab hold of him and pull him through. I want his head on my lap while I comb my fingers through his hair.

“Hey, you,” Kelton whispers, smiling though his smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “I was just thinking about you.”

“Are you okay?”

I watch as his shoulders lift, as he takes a deep breath.

“This day is never easy,” he says, as he looks off at something in the distance.

“Every year, it’s almost like I relive it all over again.

Watching her slowly fade, the last breath.

They say time heals and all that shit, and here I am still waiting for that healing to start. ”

My heart literally aches in my chest, burning from the emotions his words trigger.

“Your mother was an amazing woman.” I choke back my own tears because this isn’t about me. Today is not for me. “I could never get over just how big her heart truly was, never saw her treat anyone like they were beneath her.”

“That’s because everyone is equal, she drilled that into each of our heads since birth. Didn’t stick so well with Brigette,” he chuckles, “but I think Liz and I do alright.”

“Your mother is proud, and even though Brigette is difficult, I think she is proud of her too. You’re all good people and look at you.

” I smile when he turns his attention back to me.

“You’re doing something she loved watching you do.

The light in her eyes when you were on the field, I’ve seen it, everyone’s seen it.

She was in awe of you, and here you are now, out there living out your dreams and hers. ”

He nods, lowering his head, pinching the bridge of his nose, and I know he’s lost control of his emotions for a moment. And it’s okay, he deserves to fall apart.

“You are a good man, I’ve always known that. She knew that, and you’ve spent every single day since she’s been gone living up to the strong man she knew you’d become.”

I give him some time, and then when he lifts his head again and looks at me, any last reservations I may have had about moving to Tennessee dissolve.

I knew right then, I’d move anywhere just to be with him.

I knew I wasn’t given up who I was to chase a man, I was choosing to weave my life with his.

I understood that even if I fell, he’d be there to pick me up and reset me.

Because Kelton James wasn’t the kind of man that sat back and watched someone crumble.

He was the first person in line trying to help you rebuild the foundation to sturdy you.