Page 59 of Good Girl’s Guide to Love (Guide to Love #4)

ainsley

Mia

You okay? Though in this article’s defense, I don’t know the answer, and I thought I did.

Ainsley

Yes. And you and me both…

I’m working until 8 tonight. Want me to come over?

Thanks. I’m good. Linc’s finishing up practice then coming over.

Good. Text me if you need anything.

Will do

Linc warned me this could happen. Heck, it did happen at the beginning of all of this, when I was the new shiny toy of Nashville and sports gossip blogs.

But then it was just a few pictures, mostly of Linc and I, and a few headlines about “Linc Kincaid’s new woman.

” Yes, my name was dropped. Apparently that wasn’t hard to find.

Neither were my age or occupation. And that didn’t bother me.

But today’s blog offering hit a different nerve.

Who is Ainsley Banks and why she’s the perfect fake girlfriend for Fury star Linc Kincaid

I read it for the twenty-eighth time, though with every pass it doesn’t get better.

When it comes to me, there were the normal things that have been written before. But whatever “source” this gossip blog found really wanted to make sure that they painted me in the worst light possible.

Or if anything, the most embarrassing.

The article called me a stick in the mud. Someone who wasn’t fun, and how could I date a professional football player when I’d never ridden a roller coaster before?

One, I don’t know how they knew that and two, those things are terrifying. The conspiracy theory I’ll die on is that big amusement parks pay off OSHA to say that those speed traps of death are safe.

The article painted me out to be the scaredy-cat, meek girlfriend that I probably am.

Oh, and they of course went after my appearance.

That I’m average looking. Hips a little too big.

Why would Linc be dating a “basic woman” when he’s in a city flooded with country stars and influencers are far as the eye can see?

That’s the one that hurt the worst.

Then, of course, the real point of the article was questioning the validity of our relationship. How we were nothing and then everywhere. And, what guts me the most, how because of Linc’s “dark past” that he’s using a “do-gooder nurse” to fix his image.

They make it sound like he’s the devil. He’s not. He still hasn’t told me everything that’s happened to him. But I know in my bones it’s more than people write about.

The problem is that everything is true. And you can’t sue for libel when it’s true.

My phone buzzes to notify me that Linc’s here, and while part of me is relieved to see him, I’m also not ready to.

Anything could happen when he walks in here.

He could say that we need to ignore it and keep going about our business.

He could also say that if one article saying this has come out, more are likely to come. And with that, our time is over.

And I’m not ready for that. Not in the least.

I take a few deep breaths as I walk to my door.

I try to calm my brain that’s already in overdrive thinking of every possibility that could come the second Linc walks in.

But as I turn the handle and open the door, my brain is immediately quieted when Linc pulls me in, his hands cupping my face as he kisses me like he hasn’t seen me in days.

Like he needed to feel me to make sure I’m still here.

I’m here, Linc…as long as you want me to be.

He pulls away, a little too quick for my liking, but his hands don’t leave my face.

“Are you okay?”

I nod. “I should be asking you that.”

He doesn’t say anything as he steps inside my apartment, kicking the door closed behind him. “Oh, no. This one isn’t about me today. I’m used to this shit. Today went after you, and that’s not fucking okay.”

I hold his hand as I walk him into my living room. I let go so I can sit on one side, giving him room to sit as well. Except that apparently today we’re not going to be sitting apart, as Linc grabs my hand and pulls me to his lap.

“You know this couch is big enough for both of us,” I tease, trying to break the tension.

He shakes his head. “Not today, Ainsley Mae. Not today.”

We don’t say anything for a minute as Linc holds me.

My head is resting on his shoulder as my hand lightly rubs small circles over his chest. I’ve now seen the tattoos across his chest. Each time I do, I want to trace them, try to memorize them for when this moment is gone.

I try to remember each one, but I can’t.

I’m too focused on the speed of his beating heart.

Though, the longer we sit like this, I feel it start to slow.

It’s then I realize that sure, he wants to comfort me. He wants to make sure I’m okay, because today is the first day that headlines were aimed directly at me in a negative way. But maybe he needs this too.

No. Don’t think like that, Ainsley. Nothing has changed.

I take in a few deep breaths, because now I need to recalibrate my heart. Because I swear to heaven and Dolly Parton, this man makes it harder and harder every day to not fall in love with.

“I’m okay,” I say. “It wasn’t that bad. Embarrassing? Yes. Made me feel exposed? Also yes. But it’s not like it said I killed puppies. If that happened, I’d be calling my brother to get me a lawyer. Because I’d never kill puppies.”

It wasn’t a real joke, but I don’t even get a hint of laughter from Linc.

“Talk to me,” I say, adjusting myself so that I’m now straddling him, because I want to look him in the eye for this conversation.

I usually don’t push him. I know he’s pretty closed off, and I want to respect those boundaries.

But if he’s here to really check on me, then I need to know what’s going through his mind.

Because I won’t be okay either until I know he is.

“I just want to know who the hell is doing this,” he says. “While I have ninety-nine percent confidence that whoever is leaking these stories is out to get me, I have to ask: Is there anyone who would want to hurt you? Another ex I don’t know about that is worse than Dipshit?”

“None that I can think of,” I say. “There was only one other person I seriously dated, and that was back in college. We haven’t spoken in years. Last I heard he lives in Cleveland with his husband and their two kids.”

It takes Linc a second to process what I just said. But what he says after shocks me a little more. “You’re meaning to tell me, that you’ve only had two serious relationships in your life? How?”

My eyes leave his, but he quickly brings them back up with a lift of my chin. “I didn’t mean that against you. In no way is that a fault of yours. I just want to know how many men over the years saw you, could be with you, and chose not to? That’s fucking insanity to me.”

“Not as many as you think,” I say. “I was focused on my studies. And I’ve always wanted forever.

I never saw the appeal of dating just to date.

If I was going to be with someone, I had to know it was for the long haul.

For both, at the time, they were forever.

Just so happens one was gay and the other was a putz. ”

My choice of words makes Linc laugh. “In my opinion, they’re all putzes.”

We take in the moment of levity, before it’s my turn to ask him the hard question.

“Do you think someone is leaking these stories? That someone is out to get you?”

Katie’s the first name that comes to my mind, but I also know that sounds ridiculous, so I don’t offer it as a suggestion. I’m still convinced something isn’t right about her, but it’s also her job to keep his name out of the press. No way would she sabotage her career to ruin him.

“Believe me, I’ve been trying to figure out all of this.

Who, why. The timing. Everything,” he says.

“For weeks, there’s nothing. Hell, months, aside from a few random articles because of a few random pictures.

That column at the beginning of the week, why was it written now?

Most of that shit was written last year when I started making my name known.

So why bring it back up? Why feel the need to drag you, and therefore, try to drag me too? Nothing about this makes sense.”

“I wish I knew,” I say, even though I know he was talking in rhetoricals.

“I mean, Brad Rockwell fucking hates me,” Linc continues.

“He’s getting cleared after the bye week, and I know he’s going to make my life a living hell.

That’s if he doesn’t get traded. But assuming he doesn’t, I wouldn’t put it past him to try to fuck my world up.

Try to distract me so I’m off my game and coach gives him his starting spot back. ”

“Have you talked to Coach McAvoy about this?”

He shakes his head. “I might hate Rockwell, but until I have proof, I can’t go around throwing out an accusation like that. Once something like that hits the locker room, it would be chaos.”

“Well, maybe I can?”

Linc leans me back, a very confused look on his face. “Not that I want you to, because I’m going to say this now, I don’t, but how do you think you’re going to get a hold of my coach and tell him that the other tight end is being mean to me?”

I giggle, because when he puts it like that…

“Well, I have a few ways,” I begin. “His sister, Whitley, lives in my hometown. I go there once a week to see my family, so I could conveniently run into her and maybe drop it in her ear to maybe drop it in her brother’s?”

“You know Coach McAvoy’s sister?”

“I do. Such a sweet girl,” I say. “Or, I can have my sister Maeve call him. Or maybe his wife? Which one do you think would work best?”

I’ve never dropped a man’s jaw before. But right now Linc’s is on the ground.

“And before you ask, my sister worked with Hunter to design and decorate his wife’s new office. She’s the reporter, right? Could we call her? Maybe she can investigate around?”

Linc shakes his head as he snaps out of his daze. “She is. But you won’t. Is there any other line of communication you have with my coach that I don’t know about?”

I think about it for a second. “Besides Wes? I don’t think so.

But I could use him. He was always my favorite of Simon’s friends.

Or! My family has a way of making things happen.

I can call my sister Stella, and she could do two Google searches and figure out who’s behind this.

Then Quinn would key their cars. Simon would actually sue them.

And Maeve? Well, she’s coordinate the chaos.

We’re pretty versatile in vigilante justice. ”

For the first time since he’s walked into my apartment, Linc gives me a genuine smile. “While I appreciate it, your family doesn’t have to come to my defense.”

“They don’t have to. They’ll want to.”

My directness seems to take him by surprise. “But they don’t know me, Ainsley. Why would they want to come to my defense?”

“Because I care about you, Linc. And if I say that it’s time to rally the troops, the troops get rallied. That’s how our family works. No question about it.”

Not that I’ve ever had to say those words before.

Until I met Linc Kincaid, the worst thing that I’d need my family for is to help get my car out of a ditch because driving and I have never really gotten along.

But I know in my heart of hearts that if I said that one last Banks family shenanigan had to happen, and in the name of Linc, they wouldn’t bat an eyelash.

“I don’t want to do that to you,” Linc says, though I can feel my stomach dropping as he looks at me, sadness running through his beautiful green eyes. “I never thought that any headlines would go after you the way they did today. They shouldn’t be prying into your personal life like that.”

“I knew it could happen,” I say, trying to put on a brave face.

“We both knew, but it doesn’t make it right. I’m guessing this is going to get worse before it gets better. So yes, if you need to take legal means to clear your name, I wouldn’t blame you. Hell, I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted this to end tonight.”

My stomach drops at his words. Fake or not, I’m not ready for this to be over. “What are you saying, Linc?”

First it was sadness. Now it’s just pain in his emerald gaze. My heart hurts for him right now. Hurts for me. For us. This can’t be how it ends. I won’t let it.

“This isn’t what you signed up for,” he continues. “This was supposed to help clear my name and give me a good story. But instead, someone is now using us to take me down. Using you. I won’t put you through that. If I’m going down, I’m not taking you with me.”

There. He said it. This is over.

Except no. It’s not over. Because I’m not that easily scared. At least, not anymore.

“The hell you’re not.”

I cover my mouth.

I just swore out loud.

Judging by Linc’s wide eyes, he’s just as surprised as I am.

I haven’t sworn out loud since I was seven. It was the f-word. I heard Simon say it, so I thought it was okay. It wasn’t. I was grounded for three days, and that was the last swear word I ever said.

But this warrants it.

And it’s about to warrant it again. Because that one word just opened the Ainsley Banks flood gates.

“Did you just cuss at me?”

I nod, suddenly feeling much bolder than I did a minute ago. “I did. And I’ll do it again if your stubborn ass thinks you’re getting rid of me that easily.”