Page 30 of Goldrage (The Chrysophilist Trilogy #3)

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

AURELIA

Every instinct screams this is a trap. That Valentine has sold me out again, that guards are waiting to ambush me. But the need to see Adrian, to touch him and know he’s real, overrides all sense.

The journey to his room feels like it takes forever, but it’s only a few minutes. Each doorway could hide disaster. Each shadow might conceal betrayal. My heart hammers so loud I’m certain the entire estate can hear it.

When I round the corner to his room, I hold my breath.

As promised, the guards who usually stand outside Adrian’s wing are gone.

The absence of their hulking forms makes the hallway feel wrong, like a mouth missing teeth.

I send silent gratitude to Valentine as I approach Adrian’s door, my hand trembling as it reaches for the handle .

The metal is cold against my palm. One turn, one push, and I’ll see him. Or I’ll find guards waiting inside, Lady Harrow’s smile sharp as broken glass as she catches me in her web.

I slip inside before my courage abandons me.

Adrian sits in the wingback chair by his window, still and composed as a marble saint.

Moonlight paints him in silver and shadow, highlighting the sharp angles of his face, the careful way he holds his torso.

He’s not chained but invisible bonds still hold him.

When he turns at the soft click of the door, his eyes widen with shock that quickly dissolves into moisture that rims his lids.

“Valentine,” is all I manage, and understanding floods his features.

For a heartbeat that stretches into eternity, we simply stare at each other across the room.

I’m afraid to move, afraid that reaching for him will ruin this impossible moment.

My eyes devour him—the hollows beneath his cheekbones, the way his shirt hangs looser than before, the careful stillness that shows he’s still healing. But he’s alive. Breathing. Real.

Here.

“I wasn’t sure…” I clear my throat, trying not to cry. “I didn’t know if you still… if your feelings had changed…”

Adrian doesn’t speak, but he rises slowly from the chair. Then he opens his arms.

The invitation destroys my last shred of control. I sprint across the room and crash into his chest, feeling his arms close around me. He’s solid and warm and here, and I can finally breathe again.

A sigh escapes him that seems to come from the depths of his soul, his face buried in my hair like he’s trying to memorize my scent.

“I thought I’d lost you,” he whispers against my ear.

The words are broken with emotion I’ve never heard from him before.

“When Lady Harrow said you were dead, I thought… God, Aurelia, I thought I’d lost everything.

But then… in my grief… I just knew. I could feel you in my soul and knew you were out there somewhere, alive. All I needed was to get back to you.”

The dam breaks. Tears spill down my cheeks in rivers as I press closer, my fingers clutching his shirt. Weeks of terror and rage and desperate hope pour out of me in silent sobs that shake my entire body. His hands stroke my back, my hair, holding me together as I fall apart.

But the clock ticks in my head, each second precious. I want to stay in his arms like this and just cry everything out, but I can’t.

I force myself to pull back, swiping at my face with hands that won’t stop shaking. “We, um… We only have about twelve minutes now before the cameras come back on.” I try to gather the scattered pieces of my composure. “I need to tell you some things.”

Adrian nods, his hands rising to frame my face with gentleness. His thumbs brush away the last of my tears as those piercing blue eyes search mine. “Tell me.”

The words spill out. “Lorenzo and Eleanora… they’ve been working on plans. Getting us out. But this place is a fortress. We can’t find a way. And we need to get out as soon as possible.”

He strokes my hair. “We have time. At least until the baby is born. My strength is slowly coming back, but in a few months?—”

“No. No, we have to get out before then.” I can see the confusion on his face but I can’t tell him the truth. So I look away and try to come up with a reason that makes sense.

Forgive me for lying about the baby, my love.

“I’m scared for the baby,” I say. “Lady Harrow has made passive threats, like she wants me to have a miscarriage. And I fear that Julian will go to extremes and trap me in a room again. I want to get out soon. Before the doctor comes back for another blood draw.”

He thinks over my words as his gaze drops to my stomach. “The baby… are you feeling alright? Any complications?”

The guilt tastes bitter, but I swallow it down with all the other necessary sins. “I’m fine. We’re fine.”

“And you don’t know…”

“If it’s yours or Julian’s? No. The timeline… it could be either.” Each syllable of deception burns, ash coating my tongue, but I force my voice to be steady. “I’m sorry.”

He nods and I see the sadness in his eyes. “Whatever happens, I’ll protect you both. The baby won’t suffer for the circumstances of its conception.”

The nobility in his words twists the knife of my lie deeper. Here he stands, ready to claim a child that doesn’t exist, to shield us. And I’m feeding him poison disguised as truth.

“I want to get out of this place,” I whisper.

“I understand. ”

“Your plan to dismantle the Consortium… Are you still… do you still want to do this?”

“I do.” No hesitation, no doubt. His voice carries the weight of absolute certainty. “More than ever. It has to end.”

“Then… if we can’t sneak out of this place, I was thinking that we could move forward with your plan while we’re here. Lorenzo could help. If you could instruct him, he could look at your files?—”

“That’s a wonderful idea.”

My voice trembles. “But, I want to do it now. As soon as we can. Before the doctor comes. I’m scared of…

of something happening to the baby.” He cups my cheeks, but I’m starting to shake from weeks of worry and separation spilling out.

“I’ve been so confused,” I confess. “About us, about everything. You never said you loved me back when I mouthed it to you, and I thought maybe… maybe you’d realized this was all a mistake. ”

He pressed his forehead to mine, his calm words soothing me.

“Aurelia, you’re the reason I breathe. Of course I love you.

” His jaw tightens, a muscle jumping beneath the skin.

“But Bianca… She’s more unpredictable than Lady Harrow or Julian right now.

If she suspects how I really feel about you, she might do something that puts you and the baby in danger.

You’re right. The baby is too much at risk from all sides.

We need to get out as soon as we can. I’ll work on setting the plan in motion. ”

I sag into him. Of course . He’s been careful because of Bianca. She seems naive enough to me but he knows her better. And the ones who looks the most innocent are often the most dangerous .

He’s been protecting our love, playing a role just like I am.

I nod. “So we have to be careful.”

“For now.” His thumb traces the curve of my cheekbone. “Just until we can get out of here. Then I can start divorce proceedings and she’ll be out of our lives for good. Can you do that? Can you pretend I mean nothing to you?”

The thought makes my heart ache, but I nod again. “If it keeps us safe, I can do anything.”

My gaze catches on the digital clock beside his bed. “Eight more minutes,” I whisper. “I should go.”

I turn toward the door, each step away from him requiring so much effort. But before I can take more than two steps, his hand shoots out, fingers encircling my wrist and stopping me. The world tilts as he spins me back, and then his mouth crashes against mine with the force of a man drowning.

The kiss obliterates all thought and reduces me to pure sensation. His lips are demanding, his tongue claiming, his hands tangling in my hair. Every nerve ending ignites, and I’m fifteen again, feeling his lips for the first time.

I still remember the night he asked me out. Well, he didn’t really ask , he’d only said, “We’re going to a movie. Be ready by eight.”

When I’d asked why, he had only blinked at me like it was obvious.

“You’re my girlfriend now.”

He’d left me in the kitchen, stunned. But my heart was also fluttering .

“Adrian,” I gasp when he finally releases me, my lips swollen, my breath coming in shaky pulls. “We just agreed to maintain distance?—”

His smile blooms slow and dangerous. “That agreement doesn’t start until you leave this room.

” His hands frame my face possessively as he backs me against the wall.

The cool surface presses against my spine, trapping me between unyielding plaster and the heat of his body.

“And we still have a few minutes before the cameras come back online, correct?”

“But someone might—” My protest dies as his thumb traces my bottom lip, the touch electric.

“Then you better hurry.” His voice drops to that dark range that liquifies my bones. His breath is hot against my ear. “I need this. I need you falling apart for me or I’ll surely go insane. Just a taste to get me through the next few weeks.”

His mouth finds that spot just below my ear, the one he discovered years ago that short-circuits my brain. His teeth graze my sensitive skin, and my protests dissolve into a whimper.

“Adrian,” his name escapes, my head falling back to give him better access. “We can’t… if someone…”

“A few minutes.” The words vibrate against my throat as his hands skim down my breasts. “Give me these few precious minutes. I’m begging you. Let me taste.”

I want to give in so badly it hurts. But even in the haze of need, I’m hyper-aware of every sound outside the door, each tick of the clock, the way Adrian is still healing.

He shouldn’t be doing this. I don’t want him straining himself, but the look in his eyes is more of a command than a plea.

If he’s going to drown, he wants to do it with me on his tongue.