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PROLOGUEJude

Navajo Nation, 1998…

Jude Byrne was packed up and ready to roll. All he needed to do was load the car with his meager belongings, start the engine, and drive away, leaving the reservation, and people who hated him, in the dust. The digital alarm clock in his bedroom lit up his night table with a reddish glow as it ticked one minute closer to midnight. Jude stared at the readout, his mind strangely blank as another minute ticked by, turning today into tomorrow.

It was Jude’s birthday. He was eighteen years and several seconds old. He’d been looking desperately forward to this day from the moment he’d been brought to the reservation after the death of his father in Albuquerque five years ago. Each day had been a misery, every second filled with pain.

Born of a Navajo father and a white mother, Jude was a child of two worlds, neither of which wanted him. He was determined to find his place, somewhere with warm people who appreciated a hard day’s work and wouldn’t pay any attention to where he came from. There had to be somewhere on this lonely planet that would not only welcome him but would feel like home.

Home.

A word that was as foreign to Jude as his mother’s love. Dying in childbirth, Jude had never met Carol Byrne. All he knew of his mother was that she cursed him with her final breath. He couldn’t help but wonder if that pain would lessen over time.

Slinging his backpack over his left shoulder, Jude opened his bedroom door. He stood silently listening for any sign that his grandfather, Running Eagle, was up and about. For better or worse, Eagle had been the only person who wanted Jude after his father was murdered. There was a lot of love between them, but Eagle never understood what it had been like to be a child of two worlds. He was hated in Albuquerque for being part Navajo and hated on the reservation for being part white. The only way to be free from the disdain he felt every day in a place that was supposed to be home was to run. As far and as fast as he could.

Not seeing or hearing his grandfather, Jude grabbed his duffle bags and the heartfelt letter he’d written to Eagle and stepped into the hall. He tiptoed past Eagle’s room, avoiding the creaky spot on the floor, and moved into the kitchen, setting the letter on the table, propped up against the salt and pepper shakers. Taking one last look around the room, Jude headed for the door, unlocking it slowly and quietly. Jude moved quickly down the stairs toward his beloved Thunderbird. He stowed his bags in the trunk, shutting the hatch as quietly as possible. The T-bird was a classic American car, with a steel frame and doors that weighed a ton.

Repeating the process, Jude set his backpack on the front passenger seat and shut the door slowly, giving it a tiny nudge to engage the latch. It didn’t work. Blowing out a frustrated breath, Jude tried again. This time, it caught and held. The last thing he needed was to be tackled on the one-yard line with Eagle catching him now.

Jude had been planning this moment for months. He’d carefully crafted a list of things to bring with him in his math notebook. Eagle never checked his schoolwork and wouldn’t have thought to look through those pages for Jude’s escape plan. He was damned clever, if he did say so himself.

“So, Little Phoenix, this is goodbye,” Eagle said from the front door.

Jude yelped and jumped. He spun around to see his grandfather coming toward him. Perhaps he hadn’t been as quiet as he thought. Eagle, on the other hand, made no sound as he walked down the creaky stairs and over the gravel toward Jude. “I didn’t want…” Jude paused, not wanting to say what was really on the tip of his tongue. He didn’t want to see the disappointment in Eagle’s eyes or hear his grandfather beg him to stay in a place that had been nothing but hostile.

“I knew this day was coming and have made my own careful preparations, just as you have.”

Jude’s eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

Reaching behind him, Eagle pulled out a battered envelope and handed it over to Jude. “It’s not much but will get you started on the road toward your destiny.”

With a shaking hand, Jude took the envelope. He knew it contained cash. Money Eagle could ill afford to give up. “Eagle, I can’t take this. I’ve got money from Dad. I’ll use that to get where I’m going.”

“Jude, you are all that is left of my family. Please let me do this for you.” Eagle took a step forward, looking as if he were going to hug Jude, which he allowed.

Hearing Eagle sniffle almost broke Jude’s resolve. Maybe things hadn’t been so bad here. Maybe he could stick it out for a few more months before leaving.

“No,” Eagle said, pulling back. Tears glinted in his dark eyes. “You must follow your own path, not the one I would have laid out for you. This journey will not be easy. You will fail at times, but your stubbornness will see you through to better times. If you ever decide to come back, this will always be your home.”

Jude nodded, afraid that if he spoke, he’d burst into tears. Eagle had been the only person he’d ever known, aside from his father, who’d loved him unconditionally. Walking away meant he’d be completely on his own. There would be no warm hugs. No one to love him and keep him safe. He would truly be alone.

“Never fear, Little Phoenix. There is a place for you in this world. Be patient. You will find it when the time is right.”

Jude ran back to Eagle, throwing his arms around the older man and holding on for dear life. “I’ll call you when I can.” Summoning all the strength he possessed, Jude walked away from the only person on Earth who loved him.

Climbing into the Thunderbird, Jude turned the key and slipped the transmission into reverse. He kept his eyes on his grandfather until he faded into the darkness. Not bothering to turn on the radio, Jude drove in silence, tears falling from his eyes. He had his own destiny to fulfill, one he knew did not include the reservation. All he had to do now was reach out and grab for it with both hands. In the distance, he could see the road sign signaling that he was leaving Navajo Nation.

Crossing that border for the first time felt like he’d been thrown into a jail cell with the door locking behind him. Now, Jude had the key to free himself. He left the reservation without looking back. He rolled down the driver’s-side window and felt the warm breeze ruffle through his hair, drying the tears on his cheeks.

Jude had done it. He’d left home. He was his own man with places to go and things to do. Turning on the radio, Steppenwolf’s “Born to be Wild” blasted through the speakers. It was one of Jude’s favorites. The ultimate road trip song.

As he drove on through the dark night, Jude’s mind turned from the past to the future. He was headed for California. Months ago, Jude had researched private investigators in the Golden State. He’d gotten a copy of the test prep book and had studied until he knew the answers by heart. According to his calculations, he’d cross into California by sunup. Everything had turned out just as he’d planned.

So, why didn’t Jude feel free?