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Chapter Thirty-One

HARPER

I hate this. It’s only been a few days since I saw Marcus and the girls, but I miss them. I miss them more than I ever thought possible.

It’s the worst feeling. Some freak accident and his mother found out about us. She kept screaming that I left.

If I wasn’t missing all of them so much, I might dig deeper into what she meant. But I don’t care right now.

All I want is to be in Marcus’s arms, watching Bluey and listening to the girls giggle about their days.

I shouldn’t have fallen for them this hard. I should have protected my heart.

How could I possibly do that when Marcus has had it all this time?

It’s an endless loop my head is stuck in. With taking a few days off school to recuperate, I don’t even have the distraction of teaching to get through.

Just me and my misery.

He’s called and texted, but the last thing I want to do is get my hopes up that everything will be okay when he really can’t lose any more family .

I don’t want to ignore him, but I can’t talk to him.

I hate it.

A knock at my front door has me leaping off the couch. My heart falls at seeing Rina standing on the other side.

“Wow. Don’t look so happy to see me.”

“Sorry.” I open the door wider for her to come inside. “I was hoping you’d be someone else.”

“Someone named Marcus?” She quirks a brow at me and sets the paper bag in her arms down on the table.

“Wishful thinking, I know.”

Rina slips out of her jacket and hangs it on the hook by my front door. “Have you talked to him since the accident?”

I shake my head. “No. He has the girls to worry about.”

Rina winces.

“What?” I ask, emptying out the bag to take out containers of Mexican. “What’s that face for?”

“I hate to tell you this…”

“Tell me anyway.”

I cross my arms and lean my hip against the counter.

“Sam and Sadie are miserable.”

“What? Why?” I ask. Anxiety swoops low in my belly. Did something else happen I don’t know about?

“Because they miss you. They keep looking into your class to see if you’re there.”

“I hate this.” I bury my face in my hands, trying to stop the emotion that’s overcoming me.

Anger. Heartbreak. Tension.

Rina grabs my uninjured wrist and pulls my attention back on her. “Why haven’t you called him?”

I worry my bottom lip between my teeth. “I’m scared.”

“Why? This is Marcus. ”

Grabbing the white bag, marked with grease stains from the chips, I open it and stuff one into my mouth.

“I’m scared, okay? His mom kept yelling that I left and that she didn’t want me anywhere near her grandchildren. Those girls are his life. Why would he choose me over them?”

“Marcus loves you,” Rina points out. “There’s no choosing. He wants you and the girls. It’s not even an option.”

My lip quivers and I bite down harder, trying not to let my emotions get the best of me. “But his mom?—”

“Honey. Let Marcus deal with his mother. I don’t know what’s going on there, but based on everything you said, I don’t think that’s the end of it.”

I huff out a laugh. “I wish, but I don’t want him to lose any more of his family.”

That’s what it boils down to.

His sister and brother-in-law.

His father.

Sam and Sadie have known too much loss in their short lives. They adore their grandma. I don’t want to be the reason they don’t see each other.

Except I don’t know how I can live without Marcus. Ever since he came back into my life, I remembered what it was like to love him. To be so swept up in him, that he was the most important thing and I felt like I could take on the world.

“When did love become so hard?” I rest my head on Rina’s shoulder.

“It’s always been this way. You just have to decide if what you and Marcus have is worth fighting for.”

I busy myself with getting plates down to start dishing up our dinner and think about what Rina said. Am I ready to fight for Marcus, or am I willing to lose the person that means more to me than anyone else in the world?

I lost Marcus once.

I don’t think I could survive losing him again.