Page 39 of From Notting Hill with Love…Actually (Actually #1)

After we had eaten all of the chocolates, most of the cakes, and had drunk all of the champagne, Sean and I sat propped up against the bed on the thick soft carpet feeling a little tipsy.

Well, I was anyway; I wasn’t too sure about Sean, but he was grinning more than he usually did, so I took that as a sign of possible inebriation.

Nothing more had been said about what had happened before Francois and Tomas had shown up, and I was glad. My life was complicated enough without adding Sean as anything more than just a friend into the mix.

“So,” Sean said, tipping his empty champagne glass upside down. “What now?”

“I guess I’d better head back to my room,” I said, although I didn’t really want to.

That was the thing about Sean, he was such good company I never wanted our time together to end, wherever we were.

“We’ve got an early flight in the morning, remember?

” I knelt forward to reach for my shoes which I’d kicked off earlier when we’d flopped down on to the carpet together.

“Did you know your foot is as big as your arm from your elbow to your wrist?” Sean said, grabbing hold of my right foot. “Let’s measure yours.”

“Hey, stop it,” I said, praying he wouldn’t start tickling me.

“Why, you’re not ticklish, are you, Red?”

“No,” I said, managing to flip myself back over.

In an attempt to deflect him I decided to counteract his Julia Roberts foot quote from Pretty Woman —although I was pretty sure Sean wouldn’t realize it was used in the film—with my own from Notting Hill .

I pretended to inspect Sean’s sock-covered foot.

“Hmm, that’s an awfully big foot you’ve got there, Mr. Bond. You do know what they say about men with big feet.”

Sean raised his eyebrows at me.

“Big feet, big shoes,” I teased as I wriggled my foot away from him.

Sean laughed and moved nearer to me. “Please don’t go just yet, Scarlett. This weekend has been so much fun—well, most of it has—it seems a shame for it to end now.”

I smiled as I thought about everything that had happened since we had arrived in France together.

“What are you grinning at?” Sean asked.

“I was just remembering you in that Goofy suit—now that was class.”

Sean rolled his eyes. “Tell me about it. The things you make me do, Scarlett—no one else would have got me to do that.”

“You didn’t have much choice, if I remember rightly. It was that or walk back across the park soaking wet.”

“No, I mean you seem to uncover things about me that even I don’t know exist. ”

Sean was lying close to me on the carpet, propped up on one elbow with his head resting in the palm of his hand. He pulled himself up, so his face was level with mine.

“I’m sure that’s not always a good thing,” I said jokily, while at the same time trying to persuade my stomach that it was supposed to be resting not performing today, as it began one of the complicated routines it did when Sean was this close.

I attempted to stand up and move away from the dangerous feelings beginning to engulf me once more.

But Sean caught hold of my hand and pulled me back down. We were even closer now.

“It is a good thing, Scarlett,” he said, toying with a strand of my hair that had come loose from my ponytail. “Believe me—it is.”

Our faces were just millimeters apart now—but this time I didn’t try to get away.

As Sean’s lips gently brushed mine with the lightest of kisses, I closed my eyes, allowing all the feelings I’d wanted to experience earlier but hadn’t allowed myself to surge through my body.

Then there was a tiny pause as I felt Sean pull away.

I was about to open my eyes to see what was wrong, but then I felt his lips on mine once more.

This time, though, all his initial politeness had gone; his kisses were now more passionate, more urgent.

I felt his fingers firmly caress the nape of my neck as he tried to pull me closer. And I let him—I wanted this to happen—I’d wanted it since…

When had I started to feel this way about Sean?

A couple of weeks ago I’d thought the only reason I half liked him was because he happened to resemble a couple of my favorite movie stars, and now here we were virtually rolling about in a hotel room together.

No, forget the virtual; we now were actually rolling about, as Sean moved onto his back and pulled me down on top of him.

Our lips parted for a moment.

“Scarlett,” Sean said breathlessly as he pushed my hair, which was fast becoming extremely tousled, back off my face. “I’ve been wanting this to happen for so long.”

“Have you?” I asked in a matter-of-fact way that was not in keeping with the passion of the moment at all.

Sean didn’t appear to notice. “Of course, even before we came to Paris, before the wedding, before David, before…”

I froze when he said David’s name.

What was I doing lying here on top of Sean? Hadn’t I just said earlier that I’d been stupid to take a chance on someone else when I’d already got a man who loved me waiting at home? And now look what I was doing. This had to stop—immediately.

I jumped up, hurriedly backing away from him across the room. “I’m sorry, that shouldn’t have happened. I…I shouldn’t have let it happen.”

Desperately I tried to smooth my wayward hair back into its band. At least I could control that if nothing else.

Sean propped himself up on his elbows. “But why…” he said, looking completely bewildered. “I thought you felt the same way about me as I feel about you. Isn’t that what the whole Eiffel Tower thing was about? I don’t understand—what’s wrong?”

I paced about the room in a dramatic fashion.

“Nothing’s wrong—for you, but it is for me. I’m engaged, Sean—I’m supposed to be getting married at the beginning of April, for goodness’ sake. ”

Sean pulled himself up so he sat cross-legged on the carpet in front of me. He looked composed again now. “You must know what I think about that.”

“I can probably guess, but you don’t know the whole story.”

“Perhaps not, Scarlett, because there’s always something more going on than meets the eye where you’re concerned. But maybe you could listen to me for one moment, let me state the facts as I see them.”

I nodded. I had little choice.

“OK then.” Sean took a deep breath. “One—even before you met me, you were more than happy to leave your fiancé behind for a month and charge off to London to house-sit a stranger’s home.

Just to prove some silly notion you’ve got about movies and real life.

This, I would suggest, would seem unusual to most people. ”

I listened silently, trying to look anywhere except at Sean.

“Two—all the women I’ve ever met that are getting married never stop talking about it, especially in the run-up to the big day. You hardly ever mention your wedding or have anything to organize for it. How does that work?”

I opened my mouth to point out that was the whole point of having a wedding planner, but Sean continued with his interrogation.

“And three—for some reason I can’t understand, you appear to be marrying someone who you have absolutely nothing in common with, who doesn’t seem to excite you that much, and most importantly, doesn’t even make you that happy.

” Sean folded his arms. “There, how does that all sound to you? It hardly adds up to the romance of the century. ”

“Do I get to respond now?” I asked indignantly.

Sean nodded and leaned back against the end of the bed to await my defense.

I sat down on the chair by the desk. It didn’t feel right to go on standing while Sean remained on the floor. But I still didn’t trust myself to get down to his level again.

“First, Sean, I thought you understood why I came to London for a month and why the cinema is so important to me.”

“No, Scarlett, I don’t really understand,” Sean said with a shrug of his shoulders. “You’ve never really explained why you want to prove this to your family, only that you’re trying to do it.”

He was right, of course—as always. I’d hidden my real thoughts and feelings from the start. “If you want the full version, Sean, it’s a long story.”

“Well, I’m not going anywhere—are you?”

I still felt too high up on the chair, so I knelt down opposite Sean on the carpet. But this time, I kept a safe distance between us.

I told him all about how my life was usually.

My boring days in the office with Dad, David’s and my DIY disaster zone of a home, and how the only way I could find any romance and excitement in my life was through other people’s fictional lives at the movies.

I then explained that David’s parents were not only paying for our wedding but, with the assistance of the wedding planner, doing most of the organizing too.

Which at the time of our engagement I’d happily agreed to, so long as I got to choose my own dress for the big day.

Then I told him my feeling that there had always been something missing from my life, and how this, and the chance to do something different for a month, had made me jump at the opportunity of getting away from everything and everybody for a while.

“So?” I asked when I’d finished recounting my tale of despair. “Now do you understand why?”

Sean thought for a moment. “It ties up a few loose ends, yes.”

Loose ends? I’d just about told him my entire life story!

“But what it doesn’t explain, Scarlett, is just why you’re marrying David.”

“Because I love him, of course.”

Sean tipped his head quizzically to one side. “Oh really?”

“Yes, really,” I said defensively.

“I don’t believe you.”

“Well, it’s true,” I said, folding my arms and turning my head away like a sulky teenager. “I do love him.”

“I’ll accept you think you love him.” Sean narrowed his eyes. “But there’s something else, isn’t there?”

“No.”