Page 53 of Friends with Benefits
“No need to kick his ass, he hasn’t done anything wrong at all.”
“It’s like pulling teeth,” Charlie said to Layla. “C’mon now, are we your best friends or what? Why do you look like your favorite pet was just run over? Is it your mom?”
“Not at the moment. Okay, there is something, but I need to talk to Tripp about it first. I promise as soon as I do, I’ll explain.”
“Cryptic,” Layla said.
“Agreed. But if you aren’t ready to talk about it, you know we’ll be here whenever you need us. It’s not anything else about your mom, right?”
“No, I haven’t heard from her since she took the twins. DCF came by to start a report and take a tour of the apartment. They said they’ll be in touch, though.”
They really were the best friends anyone could have, and I knew they’d be there for me if and when I was ready to talk about it all. Like they had been there for me when Chris and my parents left. And again when I had called them about what my mom had done.
“I’m sure it will turn out fine,” Layla offered.
“Damn right it will,” Charlie said.
“Thanks, guys. For now, I want to forget about it for a little while, if that’s okay.”
Layla gave me a sidearm hug. “Of course, it’s okay. We’ll look at hot guys in tight pants with you any day.”
They spent the rest of the practice game huddled close to me on either side, and I felt their concern and love wrapped around me like a hug. It helped dull the panic and shock to a bearable amount—at least until the game ended, and I was faced with telling Tripp about the baby. It had been a couple of weeks since my mom had taken the girls. Enough time for them to settle back into a routine. Now there was no more putting off telling him the truth.
* * *
I could tellhe was excited about their win, but it was bittersweet for me. A pregnancy would ruin all of his plans. Those dreams to play pro ball? Up in smoke. Sure, people would say we could make it work, but I’d already been there. Not that I regretted taking care of the twins, but children change lives, and although they’re precious, it wasn’t always for the better.
They require sacrifice, and I would never want Tripp to have to sacrifice the dream he’d worked so hard to achieve. He’d already nearly lost it once. I couldn’t make him face that possibility again.
Tripp wasn’t the type to run from his problems, though. No, he was responsible, dependable. He’d want to do the right thing. Because of that, it was tempting not to tell him.
But he deserved to know, and I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t. I was used to shouldering my burdens alone, but this one was too heavy for me to carry.
We pulled to a stop in the parking garage, and Tripp got out of the car, still humming happily. Meanwhile, dread began to pool in my stomach, causing the hot dog and soda I’d had at the game to churn unpleasantly. Tripp took my hand, and that was it.
The doors to the elevator closed behind us, and the dam broke. I began to cry, silently at first, then full-out sobbing.
Tripp, who’d been in such a cheerful mood, froze, then wrapped his arms around me. The comforting scent of his cologne filled my nose, and even though everything else seemed to make me nauseous, I was thankful this didn’t.
“Hey, what the hell?” He was so bemused that it only made me cry harder. “Okay, angel, I won’t make you go to any more of my games, I promise, but you don’t have to cry.”
“That—that—that’s not it!” I wailed. Keening sounds emitted from my chest, and I tried to stifle them, which only made me cry harder.
“Okay, baby. Let’s get you inside, and then we can talk about it. We have some time before my parents are supposed to bring the twins back home.”
Oh, God. How was I supposed to support three kids? This was madness. I was barely keeping the twins and me afloat. How would we survive with another life thrown into the mix? I’d have to take off school. I wouldn’t be able to work for a while. Tripp was supposed to have his big break this year. He couldn’t do that with the weight of me and the girls around his neck. And now a baby. What in the hell had I been thinking?
Sex was never simple.
Relationships were never simple.
Life as a whole was complicated and messy and unexpected. Nothing about mine had ever gone to plan, no matter how much I tried to make it fit. I had wanted to go to college after high school but had only done my EMT certification. I had wanted to get married and have a family the normal way, but Chris had dumped all over that. I had wanted to make a good life for the girls and me, and now I’d ruined that.
I didn’t want to ruin my friendship with Tripp, too, but I wasn’t sure it would survive this.
The thought only made me cry harder. It didn’t faze him, though. Apparently, these months with us had made him immune to female tears. Poor guy. I was sure this wasn’t what he had signed up for.
Friends with benefits…that was the arrangement.