Page 90 of Frankie and the Fed

On the way out, the mirror calls me to stop. I can’t go out like this. My hair is messy and wild, and my clothes are wrinkled. Dark circles show my lack of sleep. Why would she want me when I look like this?

I take a quick shower and dress in clean clothes, shave and run my hand over my smooth face. I can’t remember the last time I had a clean, shaved face. This is strange. But girls love it.

There is nothing to be done about the red eyes. I take the ring out of my pocket and look at it. Now is not the time to propose to her. And my idea to do it in the privacy of our home is no longer an option. After everything that’s happened, I need something big. Huge. I need to knock her off her feet. I push the ring deep into the closet. There it will stay until I decide what to do.

But where am I even going? I have no idea where she is.

I check my phone and realize it’s still turned off. Fucking hell. I forgot to charge it at the office. I plug it into the charger and wait a minute for it to turn on.

“Answer… Answer… Answer…” I mumble at the ringing sound.

“Hey.” Her voice is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.

“Ayala...” My voice cracks.

“Ethan? Are you okay? Did something happen to you?” She sounds worried. Even now, after a strange woman told Ayala I fucked her and got her pregnant.

“Yes. I...” My voice trails off. What can I say? That I have nightmares when she’s not with me? That I want her back? She knows that. It won’t convince her of anything.

“Can we meet and talk? Please.”

“Yes. Should we meet at my place, where you slept last night?” Her tone is sarcastic.

“You know,” I state as a fact.

“I wanted to talk to you, so I went there to look for you.”

I clench my teeth. “Let me explain. It’s not what you think.”

“What else did you lie to me about, Ethan? I can’t believe anything you say anymore.”

“No, I didn’t lie to you. Please, just let me explain. You can’t get me out of your life without at least letting me explain,” I beg.

“Okay,” she says after a long silence.

I sigh in relief.

“I’m at Olive’s.”

So Olive knows too. Brilliant. “I’m on my way.”

* * *

Olive opens the door for me. She’s dressed in pajamas and has an angry look on her face.

“Not now, Olive,” I mutter. I need to concentrate, not start a fight with her too. But it seems she has other plans,, and has no intention of letting me get away easily.

“Yes, now.” She blocks my entrance. “How could you be so stupid, Ethan? You are my best friend, and I always thought you were exceptionally smart, and in the simplest things, that’s where you fall? I don’t get it.”

I rub my temples. “Please, let me talk to her. I have to explain to her what happened.”

“You should have me on your side, too. It could help you.”

“I know. But first, I must see her.”

Olive clears the way for me at last, and I go inside. Ayala is sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket and looking thoughtful. She knows I’m here, but she doesn’t turn to me. Olive disappears from view, giving us privacy.

“What do you want, Ethan?” she says, still not looking at me.