Page 20 of Forever, Never, Always (Forever #2)
I look at Seb. “And you? What do you think?”
“Yeah, Jimmy’s right. Sofia is a mother before anything else. She’s looking for security for her and Harry. If this is what you want,” he looks me in the eye before continuing, “and you have to want it, Ric, because fucking her around isn’t an option. Show her you’re the man for them both.”
“I just need to add that I agree with Seb,” says Hugo. “You really need to be sure about this, because if you blow up her life, ruin her friendships, and then walk away, she’ll never recover.”
I nod. “I’ve never been so sure about anything in my life. I’m ready to settle down, and I couldn’t see that with Zoe. But Sofia, she was made for me.”
I sleep on it, mainly because Sofia needed the break and a chance to get her head clear. But from today, we start again. From today, I’m going to show her I’m serious. She’s mine. Her and Harry.
I go to her front door and knock. The knot in my chest is tight, pulling with each second that passes. I practised what I wanted to say in the shower, keeping it light, easy, like none of it is unravelling around us.
She opens the door with tired eyes and a cautious smile. She looks unsure and defeated. That knot pulls tighter, threatening to choke me.
“Hey,” I say, stuffing my hands in my pockets. “Thought maybe you and the little man could use a day out.”
She blinks. “Ric—”
“I know,” I cut in, stepping inside before she can object. “Things are messy, but it’s going to blow over.”
She closes the door and leans against it, tilting her head slightly. “You don’t know that.”
“No,” I admit, “but I’m manifesting.”
She studies me for a long moment, assessing me, trying to find a catch. “You don’t have to pretend everything is fine,” she says gently.
“I’m not pretending.” I offer a crooked smile. “I’m just . . . choosing hope today.”
She inhales deeply before seemingly making her mind up and heading into the kitchen. I follow and spot Harry in his highchair rubbing his hands into whatever he had for breakfast. Sofia begins to wipe him clean. “What were you thinking?” she eventually asks.
I smile, knowing I’ve won. For today, at least. “The zoo.”
She glances back over her shoulder. “The zoo?”
“Yeah, yah know, that place with tigers and lions.”
She smiles. “Okay.”
I can’t fight the huge grin. “Okay.”
The zoo was a good idea. And it’s guaranteed to be Zoe free, which means Sofia feels fully relaxed as we stroll side-by-side around the animals. Harry babbles excitedly from his pushchair, and when we get to the monkeys, I take him out and lift him so he can see them properly.
“These were my favourite animals as a kid,” I tell her.
“Did you come to the zoo often?” she asks as I hold Harry to the glass as an inquisitive monkey approaches. Harry kicks his legs excitedly, and I smile.
“Yeah. It was a treat every few years.” I laugh to myself as memories assault my brain. God, I haven’t thought about it in years. “We were a handful.”
Sofia nods, her eyes crinkling as she smiles. “I can imagine having four boys was a nightmare.”
“We’d run around like gremlins and Mum couldn’t keep up,” I confess.
“She’d be running from one to the other, while the third was getting into mischief elsewhere.
” I release a happy sigh. “One time, we were at the peacocks and the damn thing screeched so loud. It was like something out of Jurassic Park, and Seb dropped his ice cream in fright. Of course, he screamed the place down and set the entire monkey enclosure off. They were all screeching back, and we all ran off like the dinosaurs were actually descending. Hugo, the ever-responsible older brother, was yelling at us to stop running whilst Mum tried to console Seb.” I chuckle to myself.
“Pure chaos. And Dad still laughs now when Mum retells the story.” I glance to find her smiling too.
“You’ll have to ask her, she tells it way better than me. ”
“I can’t ever imagine that,” she almost whispers.
“Talking to my mum?” I ask. “The most caring and welcoming woman on this planet?”
“She is lovely,” Sofia rushes to add, “but when she finds out I’m the reason you dumped Zoe, she might not be so welcoming.”
I move Harry to my hip and run my hand through Sofia’s hair, resting it on the back of her neck. “Zoe isn’t in my mum’s good books right now. But if she were to see her on the street, she’d still stop and have a conversation about the weather or her favourite recipe of the week. She doesn’t judge.”
“I love being with your family,” she admits, peeking up at me through her lashes like she’s embarrassed. “Watching you all together makes me warm inside. You’re so lucky.”
I tug her to me, placing a kiss on her forehead. “I want you to be part of that too, Sofia. You and Harry.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to. I just . . .” She looks me in the eye. “I don’t want to be the reason Zoe’s hurting.”
“We were already coming apart, Sofia. You didn’t break me and Zoe. You just . . . made me realise what I actually wanted.”
She scoffs, running her hand over Harry’s soft hair. “A single mother with her life falling apart?”
“That’s not how I see you. You’re strong and gorgeous.
The sort of woman I want to raise my babies with.
” She inhales sharply, her eyes searching mine for the lie, but she won’t find it.
I didn’t realise how serious I was until the words left my mouth.
“I’m not letting you walk away just because things got complicated. ”
“It’s not just about complications,” she says, her eyes still searching. “It’s about trust. About loyalty . She’s my best friend.”
“I get that. I do. And if you need space, I’ll give it to you. But I’m here because I can’t shake the feeling that this,” I gesture between us, “is something real. And I’d regret it every damn day if I didn’t fight for it.”
She stays quiet, just looking at me, her expression unreadable. Her eyes flicker to Harry, who’s now looking up at me too with his little chubby hand raised. I move slightly closer so he can touch my face. “He adores you,” she whispers. “You’re so good with him.”
“Yeah, well, he’s an easy kid to love. Just like his mum.”
Her lips curve into a shy smile. “I’m scared,” she admits. “And I don’t want to lose everything at once.”
“You won’t,” I say firmly. “Not if I can help it.”
And for once, the silence between us doesn’t feel so heavy.
Zoe
The bar is too loud, too dark, and exactly what I need right now.
Music thumps in my ears like a second heartbeat, drowning out every thought I don’t want to have. I’m three cocktails deep—something sugary and dangerous with a stupid name—and I laugh out loud at the joke I didn’t even hear.
The guy beside me is tall, tattooed, and has a smile that says he thinks he’s God’s gift.
Perfect. I lean in closer, my fingers grazing the edge of his sleeve like I’m fascinated by whatever story he’s telling.
I’m not. I don’t even remember his name.
I don’t care. What I do care about is forgetting.
About scrubbing out the echo of Ric’s voice.
About pretending I hadn’t witnessed the way his eyes tracked Sofia down in a roomful of people.
How he looked at her like she hung the stars.
Most of all, I needed to numb the stupid, relentless ache in my chest.
“Another round?” tattoo guy asks, his hand brushing my thigh like we’re already shagging.
“Why not?” I reply, forcing a painful smile. “I’m celebrating.”
He raises a brow while trying to grab the barman’s attention. “Oh yeah? What’s the occasion?”
I down the last of my drink in one gulp and set the glass down a little too hard. “Freedom,” I mutter bitterly, “from men who lie and friends who unknowingly steal them.” He blinks, clearly unsure how to respond, and I laugh. “Don’t worry, I’m not about to trauma dump. Just keep the drinks coming.”
He grins, happy to oblige, but even as he leans in closer, I can feel the hollowness inside growing wider.
Louder. And then I catch my reflection in the mirrored wall behind the bar and stare at myself.
My painted lips and glassy eyes are watching me break, trying to help me hide it, but I see it. And I barely recognise myself.
I raise my next drink in a mock toast. “To best friends and the men we shouldn’t have kissed.”