Page 21 of For Puck’s Sake (Seattle Vipers #2)

TWENTY

RIDLEY

I t’s scrimmage day. The final day of camp and the kids are buzzing. The excited energy in the arena is as electric as game day. Not going to lie, I’ve been looking forward to today. Tor and Alexis arrived this morning as Brea and I parted ways, and I’m so happy to see my bestie in the flesh. I’m even more excited to have him suited up on the ice with us today. The teams will be a mixture of camp counselors and older teens between the ages of sixteen and eighteen. A friendly end of camp game to show off how much they’ve learned and an opportunity to play with professional hockey players.

I mean, if I was given a chance like this as a kid I would have lost my shit. We’ve been working with these kids all summer and I feel a sense of pride at how far some of them have come. Tor even invited a few college scouts to check out three of the older campers who have the potential to do great things if given the opportunity. Derrick has stepped in as goalie for team A, while Bast is taking team B. I promised the kids a shootout all summer and after the game, the two of them will go head-to- head. Someone has to put the budding rookie in the hot seat and a promise is a promise.

When I teased Bast about it when we first arrived, he didn’t seem fazed, all I got for my taunting was a grunt from the big guy. But why am I not surprised? It’s Bast, the goalie with the most shutouts in the NHL. If one of these kids gets one past him, I will never let him live it down. Derrick on the other hand, well, if the video reels of his saves have anything to say about his ability, then he’s going to give Bast a run for his money once the season starts.

I can’t fucking wait and I’m giddy with excitement. Training camp and then preseason can’t get here fast enough. We have a title to reclaim, and as my dad used to tell me, “You’re only as good as your last game, Ridley. If you’re riding the high of a win, then make sure you keep soaring.” I take his words to heart with every game we play. Making it to the finals and going on to win the Stanley Cup last season meant everything—one of the greatest moments of my career—now we are facing a clean slate, and coach Lennox will expect the same level of commitment and outcome from us.

“Damn, it feels good to have my pads on,” I say as I skate in slow circles around Bast’s net. He is in the middle of scraping up the ice in front of him, lost in his own thoughts, but I expect nothing less from Bast. We are all creatures of habit. Scrimmage or not, a routine is a routine, and it must be followed religiously for some hockey players. Well, I guess you can say the same for most athletes. Leaving him to his ritual, I make my way across the ice, stopping beside the blue line to peer into the crowd of younger campers and their parents who came to watch today. I spot Alexis sitting alone in the stands away from the crowd, book in hand, hair in a curly ponytail on top of her head, with a blinding diamond on her left hand. I guess Tor wants the astronauts to see her wedding ring from space. I mean, really Tor?

As if she can sense my eyes on her, Alexis looks up, smiles, and waves at me. She looks at the empty seat next to her, raising her brows in question and shrugs. I shrug back, because I’m trying not to worry about the reasons why my girl is not here yet. When we parted this morning, I knew she was going to town to grab coffee from Charlie’s and then she was coming here for class. She should have been done by now. Glancing up, I check the time on the countdown clock and wonder if she got caught up talking to her students. It was their last day after all, and I know they were all sad to see her go.

“Is Brea coming? Or are you gazing longingly at my wife?” Tor asks as he skates up next to me, giving me a playful nudge with his stick that sends me gliding a few inches away from him.

I close the short distance between us and shove him back, giving the crowd a show, laughing at his surprise. I guess he didn’t expect me to retaliate. “Oh, come on, Tor, your wife is wearing a t-shirt with Mrs. Bailey on the front. I wouldn’t dare. We all know she belongs to you, you possessive jerk.” I point up to Alexis and roll my eyes. But of course, he’s no longer paying attention to me, he’s too busy blowing kisses and bowing like a lovesick fool at Alexis. Geez, is it going to be like this when the season starts?

Turning away from the PDA I keep talking, knowing Tor he’s got his captain ears on, so I’m sure he can hear me. “She’s supposed to be here by now. But she’s been teaching the music class this summer and it’s their last day too. She’ll be here,” I reply, turning my attention to the main double doors, willing her to step through them. I don’t know why I feel so anxious about her arrival, but something feels off.

“Nothing I say right now will ease your mind, until you lay eyes on her, so I won’t say anything. Alexis is fangirling hard, so if she is not here soon, she might turn bloodhound and go sniff her out,” he says with a pat to my back, pulling me out of my thoughts. I chuckle with the mental image of Alexis seeking out Brea through the building and it lifts my spirits if only for a minute.

“Oh, just so you know, my wife made the shirt herself. She’s the real possessive one in this marriage.” He chuckles, and I shake my head, because of course she is. The buzzer sounds on the clock and Tor claps his hands and yells at everyone skating on the ice, “Alright, let’s play some hockey!”

Taking one last look at the doors, I put all thoughts of Brea aside and follow Tor to the center of the ice where Devan is waiting.

“Alright, kiddos, I want a nice clean game of hockey. Let’s not break anyone’s child today.” Devan looks to me and then Tor with a serious expression on his face. He opted out of playing today and chose to referee, and it seems he is taking his job seriously. I fight back a smile and give him a stiff nod. Tor gives him a ‘do you know who you talking to?’ deadpan look, then nods as well.

Devan looks to his left toward Bast, then right toward Derrick, checking in with them both. I get into position and wait, watching the puck as he squats with it between his fingers. Tor shuffles on his skates, stick poised and ready. I can feel the anticipation of the teens at my back, their eagerness to prove themselves today thick in the air as they move nervously around us.

Devan drops the puck and it’s game on as Tor and I fight for it. The younger campers in the stands are yelling with excitement as they cheer on the older ones playing alongside us. Tor wins the puck, turning on a dime and passing it off to one of the younger players on the ice today. Franklin is only sixteen, but the kid is already a beast as he drives the puck down the ice toward Bast. He’s the one a lot of the scouts have come to check out today, and I hope they get a show.

My team gives chase, one of the defensemen tries to intercept Franklin, but he spins gracefully like a ballet dancer, shaking off the check and aims for Bast. I’m so impressed by the maneuver; I find myself watching instead of playing. I think I even hear Devan shouting encouragement. Franklin slows down as he approaches Bast and I watch in awe as this kid shows no fear, handling the puck like a seasoned professional, getting right in front of the crease, he shoots. Bast drops low to catch the puck on his pads, but the puck slides underneath by a mere inch to hit the back of the net. Holy shit . The arena goes berserk. Hell, I’m even cheering. Bast looks impressed as he gets to his feet, stick under his arm and applauds Franklin for getting one by him. Tor skates up to Franklin and pats his helmet and the game is officially on. I guess there’s no need to hold back with these kids, they came to play.

The rest of the game goes by fast, Tor’s team take the win. But every kid on the ice today got a chance to show off their skills throughout. All in all, the game was a success. I feel like a proud dad, I can’t stop smiling as all the kids take to the ice piling on top of each other. I instinctively turn toward the stands, my eyes finding Alexis easily as she claps and cheers with the rest of the crowd, but my smile falls when I see the seat next to her is still empty. I try to stay focused throughout the scrimmage, but my eyes keep wandering back to where Brea is supposed to be. I look toward the entrance but there is no one standing there but a few parents as they watch their kids celebrate.

Frowning, I skate past Tor, Bast and Devan, they all look my way with various concerned expressions, but no one speaks to me. They know me well enough to know intervening before I’m ready is a bad idea. I just need to figure out what happened between this morning and now to prevent Brea from being here. Jumping over the boards, I drop down next to my phone and sit. Sliding my gloves and helmet off, I place them beside me. I immediately swipe my screen and tense at the number of notifications on my phone. I’ve missed ten calls from Hazel and five from Lia, but I ignored them to open up messages from Brea.

Luna: I’m on my way.

Luna: Ridley, I’m not going to make it to the community center. I’m sorry. I’m not going to make the scrimmage, baby. I will see you later this evening at the Summer Festival.

Luna: I just saw the post. Ridley, I believe you. It’s a lot to process. This will not make me run, I promise.

Luna: I love you.

My frown deepens. I’m confused for just second before it all falls into place. Missed calls by Hazel and Lia, Brea mentioning a post.

“Fuck!” I shout, then I remember where I am, hoping no one heard me amongst all the noise in the arena. Pulling up my social media notifications I’m stunned by the sheer amount. Opening Instagram, I tap on the post I’ve been tagged in and freeze. My stomach churns, my heart rate spikes, and I can already feel the headache starting behind my eyes. My hands shake as I bring the phone closer to get a better look.

A black and white sonogram. The image of a baby clear and defined with a heart emoji on the top of the baby’s head. I swallow past the lump in my throat as I read the simple message.

Baby Masters.

I don’t know how long I stared at the image on the screen and the message below. Grief washes over me and I’m fighting to breathe. I drop my head and squeeze my eyes shut, no longer caring where the hell I am. My vision blurs as tears fall. I don’t wipe them away.

I’m angry at whoever this woman is, for her trying to exploit me for personal gain. I’m overcome with so much sorrow. What a cruel joke this is. But no one knows about the baby we lost. No one knows this post is a blow to mine and Brea’s mental stability. So, I let myself mourn, not for the baby on the sonogram, but the child I lost. For the life that wasn’t meant to be. There’s no way this baby is mine, I know it. I can only imagine what Brea is thinking, but she said she believed me, that this wouldn’t make her run. I’m going to hold her to that promise. We’ve come so far in such a short period of time since we decided to start again. Her willingness to stick with me despite this, it means the world to me.

I don’t know how this image got past Hazel and my PR Team but I’m going to tell her to leave it. There is no hiding this. From all the comments and shares, this has probably already made it to all the major news channels. Well, fuck it, I’ll fix this myself. The only person I’m worried about this affecting is the woman I love. Maybe I should take a leaf from Alexis’s book, face the world and reveal the truth about everything. Give the public what they want, then maybe, finally, I won’t be the flavor of the month anymore. Regardless, I just want my life to quiet down.

I don’t need to lift my head to know my friends have approached. I can feel their eyes on me, but no one says a word. I raise my hand and turn the phone toward the three of them and watch their reactions.

Devan sucks in a sharp breath, covering his mouth with his hand. “What the fuck. This shit has gotten out of hand.” His eyes widen in horror. “These bunnies are shameless.”

“Hazel will fix it. Do you want me to get Parker in on this?” Tor asks as he pulls his phone out of his back pocket. Forever the fixer my best friend, and I love him even more for the gesture. But I shake my head no. No, I’m going to let this play out. This woman, whoever she is, will be called to the carpet publicly so others will think twice about doing this again. If there was a nugget of truth to her story in any way, this situation would be different, but I know it is a lie.

Bast rubs the back on his neck with his hand. No gloves, no pads. I hadn’t even realized that they were all out of their gear. How long have I been sitting here in a daze over all of this? “We are here for you. Whatever you need. But you need to jump ahead of this before things get out of hand. You know how fast the sheep start to spin their own stories. They will try to paint you in a negative light, and there’s not a negative bone in your body, Rid. I’m angry for you, with you and for this entire situation.” I hear the anger in his voice, and I wonder if his emotions are coming from his own personal experience. Bast never told us why Winnipeg traded him to the Vipers. There are rumors that he wanted to leave. Something happened between him and another teammate, but I’m not sure what. It was all very hush hush. But I guess we all have secrets and things we’d rather keep to ourselves. He will tell us when he’s ready and I will be right beside him lending him my support.

I blow out a breath. “I’m going to tell you three something. Something I’ve held on to for a while now. I know now it was one of the reasons Brea left me. We’ve both kept this close to our hearts. At the time, it was too painful. I was too raw, especially after she left,” I say running a hand down my face.

Tor leans over the boards and pats my knee in a show of support. “Hey, you don’t have to tell us. But I always wondered if there was something I was missing when it came to the way you two ended.”

Devan raises his hand, making my lips tip up in a small smile. “I thought so too. I was waiting on you to tell us eventually.”

Bast sighs. “Same. Your reaction to the breakup, the pain in your eyes, and the way you wanted to walk away from this”—he circles the arena with his hand—“I kind of figured there was more.”

I look at the three of them. My family. Tor and Devan have always been there for me. When Bast came along, he easily fit into our little circle of trust. I loved them all. They’ve seen me at my best and worst. I should have let them in completely. Maybe I wouldn’t have reacted the way I did after the breakup. Maybe I would have found healthier ways of dealing with the loss of my world.

“You suspected right, there was so much more,” I say as I begin to tell them of everything that happened between Brea and me. The night we lost the baby, the ectopic pregnancy, and the possibility of her never conceiving again. I explained why we kept it to ourselves in an attempt to keep something so personal out of the media. I let my tears fall freely again when I told them about the night she left, how I begged her to stay, that I could fix what was broken.

“But it wasn’t enough,” I say as I look up again to find that Alexis has joined us. She stands between Tor and Devan. Tor has her clutched to his side as she wipes away tears. “She left with a note and didn’t look back.”

“I get it,” Alexis says, her voice strained. “Brea was drowning.”

I nod my head in agreement. “She was. I didn’t know. I was away all the time. Hockey got me through it because I could just focus on the game. She would tell me she was okay and I believed her.”

“Trauma affects us all in different ways, we all react to it differently, running is one of them.” Alexis looks at Tor with a brief frown on her face. I can only assume she’s thinking about what she and Tor went through. “But at the same time, when you’re in it, you believe it’s for the best.”

“In the past few weeks it dawned on me Brea had no support. Neither did I—I don’t mean you guys.” I hold up my hand to stop the protest I know is coming and continue, “Brea’s parents are practically nonexistent in her life. My parents are gone. Lia doesn’t handle loss well after everything we went through, so I couldn’t lean on her. I guess what I’m trying to say is, I understand. I acknowledge where it all went wrong. And now, you guys, my family, the people that I care about the most, know,” I say as I look at Devan, who is frowning, and I smile because I know what he’s thinking.

“I will tell her when I get home. She’s going to be pissed, but I can handle the little runts wrath,” I say as I imagine steam bellowing from Lia’s head as she curses me for keeping all of this from her.

Devan rubs his beard wearily. “Oh good, because Spitfire is vicious, and I didn’t want to be the one to relay all of this to her.”

Alexis laughs. “Spitfire, huh?” she asks, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

Tor, Bast, and I turn our gazes to Devan who is actually blushing.

I want to laugh but I keep my face neutral when Devan looks at me sheepishly, his hands held up surrender. “It’s a nickname, that’s all.”

I raise a brow. “Are you sure?” I tease. I know there’s something going on between him and Lia, and I guess like Bast, I’m just going to have to wait and let their stories play out.

Devan sputters, “Well, huh.” He looks to Alexis who throws her head back and laughs. I don’t think he’s going to get any help from her anytime soon.

Tor clears his throat. “Thank you for telling us, Rid. Like Bast said before, we are here for you. Whatever you need.”

I look at them all gratefully and another crack in my heart mends.

“What I need is funnel cake,” I say to lighten the mood. What I don’t say is that I need Brea, my home, my moon, my true north, and all will be right in my world.