Page 43 of Follow the Rhythm (Fairview City Omegaverse #2)

I couldn’t relax after seeing Jess and Kieran. We got back to the flat, and I didn’t stop pacing for hours.

“You said she was jealous ?” I asked Charlie for at least the tenth time.

“Yeah, it seemed like it.” He was sitting on the couch, his elbows on his knees, watching me make laps across the living room with the long-suffering patience of a monk.

“Jealous of who, though?”

He laughed. “That’s a great question. Why don’t you sit down?”

I shook my head as if his suggestion were an annoying fly. “I couldn’t possibly sit, darling. There’s too much to worry about.”

What I really wanted was a drink to smooth the ragged edges of my anxiety, soften them into something more manageable. But then I looked at Charlie, and I didn’t want to let him down. Maybe one day I wouldn’t want to let myself down, but I’d settle for making him proud for now.

Charlie stood and grabbed my shoulders, gently herding me to the couch. “Sit,” he said, planting me firmly on the couch. He sat on the ground in front of me, his back against my shins, so I couldn’t escape.

I sighed and ran my fingers through the thick waves of his dark blonde hair. “Why do I have to sit?”

“Because you need to sleep at some point tonight, and I don’t think pacing around is going to help.” He leaned into my touch with his trademark enthusiasm and my heart contracted. He really was so lovely.

Playing with his hair was strangely soothing. I let the strands fall through my hands, my eyes unfocused.

“You know it’s going to be okay, right?” Charlie asked.

I scoffed. “And how do you know that?”

“Because you have friends that will be there for you,” he said simply. “Kieran, Jess, me.”

“Is that what we are? Friends?” I asked a bit archly.

He huffed a laugh. “Well, I think we’ve progressed past that stage of our relationship.”

“And you truly think she was jealous?” The afternoon had been like emotional whiplash, but Jess’s reaction had given me a glimmer of hope.

“Oh, super jealous. I told you not to give up.” He leaned his head back to smile at me. “Come on, you’re going to lie down even if I have to strap you to the bed.”

I smiled. “Don’t make empty promises, darling.”

The next day was interminable. My nerves weren’t any better after a surprisingly decent night’s sleep. Something about sleeping next to Charlie put me out like a light.

I distracted myself by messing about with my guitar, playing with chords, and plucking out melodies. Charlie was on his laptop, working on finding his next tour contract even though I’d told him I was perfectly happy to be his sugar daddy, and I watched him absentmindedly.

“First Day of My Life” by Bright Eyes popped into my head. I’d learned it in high school, with the idea that I’d play it for Jess someday.

As I played and sang under my breath, Charlie tapped the beat with his fingertips.

The song morphed into something else, a new melody that matched the ease I felt with Charlie, the hope I now had for the future.

For the first time in a year, I hit that flow state, the one where the music seemed to come from somewhere else rather than myself.

The song was gentle, softer and smaller than anything I’d written with Michael. Maybe that was okay.

The words would come later, but I scrambled to get my phone and record the melody while it was still fresh.

“Don’t worry, I got it,” Charlie said, smiling, and gestured with his phone. He’d recorded me playing. “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. You’re just very hot when you’re inspired.”

I laughed, delighted. “You’re quite the muse, darling,” I said, and pulled him from the chair over to the couch to show just how inspiring I found him.

Claire and Deb looked older than I remembered, diminished by grief like the rest of us. They stood as I entered Kieran’s apartment, Charlie next to me, and my heart ached thinking about the last time I’d seen them, just after Michael’s funeral.

Claire came to meet me and gave me a warm hug. Her scent was comforting and familiar.

“Hello, dear,” she said. “Don’t worry, Kieran’s told us you weren’t the one who leaked the album. I already knew, of course, but now we can skip that part.”

“I’m so sorry we didn’t tell you about the songs,” I said, looking down at her.

“Well, it’s water under the bridge now,” Deb said, appearing by my side.

“I have something else to tell you,” I said, but Kieran cut me off.

“Ellis, help me make everyone a cup of tea,” he said loudly.

“But -” I gestured to Claire and Deb.

“Now.” He jerked his head towards the kitchen. I followed him.

“You don’t need to tell them,” Kieran said under his breath when we got to the hob. “It’s not going to help anything. It’ll just bring up more pain.”

I gripped the countertop. “That feels like a cop out.”

“Do you think it’ll make them feel better?” Kieran said, his voice a rumble. “Knowing he manipulated you?”

“He didn’t,” I protested.

Kieran sighed. “He did, though, Ellis. And if I wasn’t already so pissed at him for leaving us, I’d be even angrier that he left you with this guilt.”

I wasn’t sure I agreed with his perspective, but I did agree that dredging everything up wasn’t productive. “You’re sure?”

“Jess and I agreed,” Kieran said, as if that made it final. I looked at Jess, talking to Claire and Charlie in the living room, and she met my eyes for a second, the expression full of meaning. And that was enough for me.

We brought mugs of tea out to everyone.

“Lovely, thank you, boys,” Claire said. “Now, what is it you had to tell us, Ellis?”

I froze.

“Does it by any chance have something to do with this handsome man you’ve brought with you?” Claire said with a sly smile.

I latched onto the lifeline and smiled. “I see Charlie’s already charmed you. He’s quite good at that.”

“That he is,” she said. “Jess also tells me you knew each other from school.”

“No embarrassing stories.” I pointed at Jess sternly. “I have a persona to maintain.”

Jess grinned. “Do you want to know about the time Ellis used Wite-out to paint his nails, and all his fingers swelled up like sausages? Or the time he tried to give himself a piercing on his -”

“Jesus Christ, Jess, not that one,” I shouted.

Charlie burst out laughing. “You’ll have to tell me about that later,” he said.

It felt strangely joyous, everyone together and sharing. But at some point, the conversation wound back around to Michael.

“What do you want us to do?” Kieran asked seriously. “We can ignore the speculation, but Charlie thinks that’ll just keep the conversation going.”

“I don’t mind saying I have no idea what to do,” Deb said slowly, her arm wrapped around Claire. “But it feels wrong to say nothing.”

Claire nodded, her eyes wet.

“I didn’t know Michael. But his music was really important to me, in the darkest parts of my life,” Jess said quietly. She was tucked into Kieran’s side. “Is there a chance that being open could help people feel a little less alone?”

All I wanted to do at that moment was hold her. Because the pain in her voice broke my heart.

Claire and Deb were on board after that. Through many revisions and tea breaks, we had a statement:

Dear Michael,

It’s been over a year, and it still doesn’t quite feel real that you aren’t here with us. We’ve tried to do our best to honor your memory, but we’ve certainly failed a lot along the way.

Your songs mean so much to so many. While the grief feels immediate to those who knew and loved you, all the people you touched with your music feel it, too.

We’ll never understand why you chose to leave us here without you. We wish you were still here. And we still love you dearly.

If any good can come from losing you, we hope it can be helping those who feel alone or lost get the help they need.

We will be officially releasing Reward , with all proceeds going to support suicide prevention.

We miss you, mate.

Understandably, Claire and Deb needed a breather after we finalized it and left for their hotel. Charlie had contacts in music media that he’d send the statement to rather than involving Johnny at all. And he’d already started making arrangements to release Reward on his dad’s label.

I carried the collection of tea mugs to the kitchen and dumped them in the sink.

I took a moment there, hunched over the countertop, to catch my breath.

Part of me still felt like a liar for not telling them about my involvement in Michael’s death, but another part of me was shamefully relieved that I hadn’t.

Jess cleared her throat behind me, and I turned to face her. She was wearing a simple black tank top and dark jeans, her hair up in a ponytail, but she made my breath catch all the same.

She didn’t ask me if I was alright, or try to tell me I’d done the right thing. She just slid into my arms. I breathed in her scent, which sent waves of calm through me.

After a few moments, she pulled back and framed my face with her hands.

Her eyes were intent on mine. She leaned forward on her tiptoes and brushed her cheek against mine, first one, then the other.

Something unspoken passed between us, a call from her Omega to my Alpha.

A purr built in my chest in response. And without thinking, or considering the consequences, I finally, finally pressed my lips to hers.