Page 10 of Flagrant Foul (Totally Pucked #3)

The two on the floor groaned and nodded.

Seth couldn’t move his head and his face was going bright red and blotchy, but he blinked hard and moved his lips to form a pained whimper.

Sev nudged one of the kids on the floor with his foot, and then the other, speaking to them in turn.

“You don’t talk to him again…and you don’t talk about him.

” He turned his attention back to Seth, getting right in his face, so close that Seth screwed his eyes shut when Sev spoke.

“And you .” Sev raised his free hand and jabbed Seth’s forehead hard with his pointer, so he was in no doubt whatsoever who he was speaking to. “You don’t even look at him.”

Sev leaned in then, lips all but touching Seth’s ear, and whispered something inaudible before releasing him and watching dispassionately as he slithered onto the floor.

“You got everything you need, Tee?” he asked me.

I released the breath I was holding and plopped down to Earth, landing in a strange version of reality. A version where homework and books and being prepared for the next day still mattered. I unlocked my locker robotically, put away the things I didn’t need to take home, and closed it again.

Sev put an arm around me as we walked down the hall. That’s when I began to tremble .

He took me to the vending machine near the gym and bought me a Pepsi. I dropped my bag to the floor and sat down heavily, knees bent, back pressed against the wall. Sev cracked open my can for me and sat next to me as he handed me my drink.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

He was normal Sev again. Not the warrior. Not the wolf. Not even a fighter. He was a nice boy with obsidian eyes and a kind smile.

Seeing normal Sev’s normal smile made me start crying.

“I-it’s true,” I sobbed. “It’s true. The things they were saying about me. They’re all true.”

His expression didn’t change at all. Not even a flicker. There was no hint of surprise or disappointment. “You think that changes anything? It doesn’t.”

He put his can down next to him and turned his body toward me. He took my face in one hand and held my jaw, forcing me to look at him when I tried to look down. He drew a semi-circle under my eyes, wiping my tears away with a gentleness I didn’t know he possessed. It made me cry harder.

“Hey, don’t cry, Tee. This doesn’t change a thing. You’re the same person you’ve always been.” He wiped away a fresh sheet of tears caused by his words. His fingers were warm on my skin. His face was so close to mine I could feel his breath on my lips. “You’re my Bear. My Teddy Bear.”

“Am I still?”

“Of course you are,” he said without breaking eye contact. “Nothing could ever change that.”

When he said it, I believed him, and for the first time in months, I felt different. Light and free. Like I could breathe and exist without something bad happening. Safe. For the first time in months, I felt safe.

We talked for a while and sipped our drinks, and by the time the sugary concoction hit my veins, I felt a little better.

Sev had his arm around me and my head was resting on his shoulder.

He was saying all kinds of wonderful things about me, and at one point, he said, “If anyone messes with you again, don’t go to Nate, okay?

Come to me about things like this in the future. ”

He said it firmly, almost the same way he’d spoken to Seth and the others earlier. It made me feel dizzy. He turned his head to face me and whispered into my hair. “I’ll make them stop.”

That made me feel dizzy too.

“What are you going to do?” I teased, caffeine, sucrose, and my proximity to Sev blending into a heady cocktail that altered my mood. “Fuck up everyone who doesn’t like me?”

“I mean, yeah. Sure. Why not? I’ve got the time.”

A broken laugh left me. It started soft but quickly turned into a dry cackle. “I don’t think it’s really a matter of having the time, Sev. I think there are a few more important matters to consider.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, cocking a brow and giving me a wolfish grin.

“I mean, you can’t just go around kicking the shit out of people.”

He raised his can to his lips and tilted his head back, pouring the last of his drink into his mouth.

“Yes, I can,” he murmured so quietly I couldn’t tell if he was talking to himself or making a joke for my benefit. “Besides, I can’t help it. I get real mad when people touch you.”

I laughed riotously at that. Loudly and long.

In part, I laughed from abject relief because I truly believed that after what had happened, Seth and his asshole friends wouldn’t bother me again.

And I laughed because my fourteen-year-old na?veté allowed me to think something magical was happening between us.

Something new. Something that made my spine tingle .

Sev’s body was a wall of solid muscle beside me.

It bore my weight as though it were inconsequential.

As though I were weightless and not a burden to him at all.

His face was so close to mine that I could make out the rings of coffee brown around his pupils that were usually undetectable.

His smile was unfamiliar. Sheepish and unsure.

A corner of his top lip attached to a canine and got stuck there.

Fool that I was, I thought we were dancing. I thought there was music and lights. I thought we were moving together. A subtle give and take set to a nice little melody.

I thought he could hear it too.

I was flirting, and I thought he was flirting back.

As soon as the thought arrived in my mind and became conscious, I shook it off. It was ridiculous. I’d given myself a lecture about this hundreds of times by then. Probably more. I’d probably lectured myself on the matter a thousand times. Sometimes I did it two or three times before breakfast.

It was very simple: Sev was like Nate. He liked girls.

It was sad, but it was one of those things. I knew firsthand how impossible it was to choose who you were attracted to. Or how impossible it was to change it. My infatuation with Sev was pointless, embarrassing, and doomed .

You have to stop liking Sev, I told myself in no uncertain terms. He’s Nate’s friend, and he thinks of you as nothing more than a kid brother.

He likes girls, and you need to get that through your head.

You need to start liking a boy who likes boys to distract yourself.

That’s what you need to do. Neil’s nice.

Jason is nice. Jude is really nice, but he's obsessed with Romeo. Still, just choose one of them and make yourself like him. It’s that simple.

If you like a boy who likes boys, at least there’s a fighting chance he’ll like you back.

“Tee,” Sev said quietly. “When you’re ready, you should tell Nathan you’re gay. He’ll be cool. You’ll see.”

It brought my internal ramblings to a crashing halt and doused me in a stark reality.

I was going to have to tell people. Fuck.

I’d had so much other shit going on and had spent so much time thinking about how to hide my sexuality from others that I hadn’t given a second thought to the fact that, eventually, I’d have to tell people. Voluntarily.

The realization made me start crying again.

“No, no, Tee,” Sev said, pulling me close. “Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. Nate will be fine. You’ll see.”

“I know he’ll probably be fine.” I sniffed. “But what if he’s not? What happens then?”

“He will be. ”

“You don’t know that,” I wailed. “No one knows things like that. Everyone thinks they do, but they don’t. Not really.”

“I do know it.”

The way he said it was absolute. So certain it sounded as though it were based in fact, not opinion. I was about to tell him he couldn’t predict Nate’s response, no matter how well he knew him, when something in his eyes stopped me. “I know because he was totally cool when I told him I’m bi.”