Page 22

Chapter 21

Penelope – A Week Later

I lick my lips as I stare at my parents' house— well, more like mansion.

This house always felt like it was suffocating me despite its size. It has ten bedrooms, more than our family needed, but not one room gave me a safe place after I realized I was just a money maker for them.

My parents wanted me to be a certain way growing up, and at first, all I wanted to do was make them happy. I thought they knew what was best, and I agreed with them until I heard my father on the phone when I was around eight years old.

“I won’t go below $100,000 for Penelope’s hand in marriage, Andrews. She’s going to go to law school; she’s taking dance and ballet, and she's already at the top of her classes. Every socialite mother will want her as a daughter-in-law.”

His words still echo in my mind, which may be why I won’t fully give myself to Taylor.

He’s a famous hockey player, and women line up just to speak to him, wanting to hang off his arm but I don’t want to be someone’s arm candy. I want to be someone’s everything. I don’t want to feel like I have to be someone I’m not just to keep them happy. This scares me because if I’m not matching up to who he thinks I should be, I may revert into the person he wants, the person my parents wanted me to be. That is someone I tried my hardest not to become because I wasn’t happy being her.

For years, my parents pushed me. I had to wear frilly dresses and attend dinners with adults leering at me to see if I was good enough for their son. I was forced into dance classes and ballet despite having two left feet and had to attend the top schools with kids who bullied me until I hit high school and fought back.

They took my things away if I strayed from their perfect daughter, and I don’t just mean my phone or any electronics. I mean my casual clothes, left with only ones my mother deemed fit, ones I hated. I’d only have a bed in my room and couldn’t eat what I wanted. I mean, I never even had a phone until I saved up to buy an old one from the second-hand store because I wasn’t deemed worthy of technology. I didn’t ‘do as I was told’ so I couldn’t have luxuries like my sister.

They fawned over her and she relished it while I sat on the sidelines.

I chew my bottom lip as I look over the house before taking a deep breath and climbing the stairs. When I reach the large white door, I don’t knock, instead, I walk in and head to the living area. When I find it empty, I sigh and walk down the hallway towards the large white door of my dad’s office—the same door I stood behind, hearing his lovely conversation about selling me.

I know he’s home. I called the office, and his secretary said he was working from home today because mom’s decided to go to the office.

He’s never been able to work with Mom nearby and I really don’t need to know why.

I knock on the door and wait as my nerves pick up.

“Yes,” my father answers, and I take a deep breath before walking into his office.

The walls are dark green, and the furniture is dark brown. His left window covers the whole wall bringing in natural light. This is the one room in the house my mother had no say in.

“Hey, Dad,” I say when he doesn’t look up and walk further into his office.

He looks at me but doesn’t seem surprised that I’m here. In fact, he looks resolved when he notices I don’t have Hudson.

He’s with my sister at Tony’s place. I didn’t want him here for this because, honestly, I didn’t know how I was going to react.

I know I won’t shout or scream. I’m just going to open up about what is on my mind and hope he can make some sense for me because honestly I have let go of the past. Deep down I know I have, but something is still holding me back from Taylor and I think my dad can help.

Dad sighs and says, “Let’s sit on the couch." He nods to the dark brown leather couch in front of the window, and I walk over to it as he stands up and follows me.

I don’t look at him as he sits, instead, I look at my lap and twiddle my fingers.

A part of me, a big part, has forgiven my dad, and that is mainly because of how amazing he has been with Hudson. My mom, well, I was never close to her to begin with, not after Avery was born and tried to do the whole three-way matching awful outfits thing. And especially not after I overheard my dad’s conversation.

I wasn’t willing to be her doll, so she kind of just disregarded me, I guess. I love her, don’t get me wrong, and I know she loves me, but we’re just not close. Growing up, I saw myself as a daddy’s girl until I overheard his phone call, and I realized I meant nothing to him. Or rather, didn’t mean as much as I thought anyway.

“I’ve been wondering when you’d want to have this conversation,” he starts when I don’t say anything. “I’ve dreaded it,” he continues, “but I also know it’s something that is needed and not to be brushed underneath the rug.”

“Mom would never have a rug in her home,” I mutter, and he snorts, knowing it’s true.

“Your mother definitely has different tastes to mine, that is for sure,” he admits.

I smile a little as my eyes go to his bookshelf, which has several photos of my sister and me growing up, including some of my son. My mother would die if they were placed on the mantelpiece in the living area, disrupting her lovely designer scene.

I think there are three: one of her and Dad on their wedding day, one of me and my sister three days after she was born, and another of all of us. All of these pictures were taken by professionals, whereas the ones Dad has are random pictures taken by cell phones. He has over twenty, showing his love for his family, love I never got to experience growing up.

“I’ve fallen in love with him,” I admit quietly, unsure how to start our conversation.

Dad hums and replies, “I think you fell in love with him the night you met him, Pen,” and I look at him. He gives me a sad smile and admits, “Before you met Taylor, you were our normal, refusing to bend to our will Penelope while working your butt off in school,” I smile a little, “But after you met him, you changed. You were more withdrawn and lost, and it was like you were missing something. I just didn’t realize what until you said you were pregnant.”

My eyes tear up as I look at the photos again, and I whisper, “He wants me to meet his family tonight at the game.”

Dad hums again and confirms, “But you’re refusing, holding him at arm’s length.”

I nod and say, “Seeing him get hurt last week, not being able to get any answers from anyone, I felt like I was being suffocated, like bricks were weighing down on my chest. When he finally answered his phone, I broke down to the point I couldn’t breathe and not just because I heard his voice and knew he was alright but because I realized I was madly, deeply in love with him and couldn’t bring myself to fully let him in.”

“Your mother and I, we really screwed you and your sister up,” he says, and I don’t deny his words. He continues, “We put Avery in danger just so we didn’t lose this house, and we hounded you to go through with a contract marriage out of obligation because of how much the Andrews helped us at the beginning. I will never forgive myself for what I put you through, for what I put your sister through and while she’s finally gotten her divorce and married Tony yesterday, something your mother is not happy about missing by the way,” he gives me a pointed look knowing full well I knew all about their elopement and I give him my best innocent smile.

He chuckles and shakes his head, then continues, “You haven’t managed to give all of yourself to the man who took your heart, and I know that is my fault. You are independent, and most of the time, that is an amazing quality to have in any man or woman, but you use your independence as a defense mechanism.”

I lick my lips and admit, “I’m scared,” Dad nods as he grabs my hands.

“I know you are sweetheart. I know I royally fucked up with you, and I know how lucky I am that you are allowing me in your son’s life. But you need to face your fears.” My tears fall, and he wipes them away and whispers, “Give Taylor a chance Pen. Open your heart to him, lean on him, and allow him to take care of you, and I promise you, you won’t disappoint him. I promise you won’t revert into that person you seem to think he’ll want, the person your mother and I tried to shape you into being. He pisses you off, you tell him. Don’t turn into someone you think he will want because he loves you, sweetheart, for who you are, and he’s proven that since he came back into your life.”

I sniffle, knowing deep down he’s right, and finally ask, “If Hudson wasn’t part of the equation, would you still be trying to pressure me into marrying Zane-hole?”

He chuckles at my nickname for him then admits, “No, I wouldn’t be, and I’m not just saying that. I would have seen my errors on my own. It just took you to say you were pregnant for me to open my eyes sooner.”

I nod, look back at the photos, and whisper, “Do you think I should go to the game?”

He hums and states, “It would be a good start, and I know it’ll make Taylor extremely happy. Just take things at your pace but while also allowing him in a little bit more. He won’t hurt you like we did sweetheart.”

I nod and stare at the picture of me and my dad when I was roughly five. I’m looking at him like he’s my whole entire world while he’s grinning at the camera.

We’re at the beach and everything looks so normal.

“Will you ever forgive me,” he asks, and I look at him.

“I did forgive you,” I admit, “And yes, Hudson was a huge part of that, and speaking to you today, it’s kind of removed some of the weight off my shoulders. I know you understand you weren’t the best of parents, I mean, you put a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and food in my stomach. But as soon as I refused to bend to your will, it was like I didn’t exist and I resented you for so long, but I was also grateful,” I look at my dad to see his eyes wide in shock.

I give him a small smile and admit, “You shaped me into who I am, not the person you wanted for Zane but a driven and hardworking person. You forced me to work hard for everything I have, from my condo to my degree. I fought for it all, the pride I feel every day seeing what I have because I earned it is an amazing feeling, and for that, I thank you.”

I lean forward and kiss my dad’s cheek before resting my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me and mumbles, “Even so, I’ll forever feel guilty for not giving you everything you deserved, which is the world, but I just hope you can allow Taylor to give it to you instead and Penelope; I haven’t said this before, but I need you to know, I am so proud of you.” My tears fall as I close my eyes and let his words wash over me.

An hour later, I climb out of the cab, lean down, and grab the car seat with Hudson inside. Hudson grins wide at me, making me smile.

“Thank you, sir,” I say to the driver, and the guy nods with a smile as I shut the door.

My car is in for servicing, something Taylor did for me because, well, I never have had it checked, so, after Dad dropped me off at Tony’s, I called a cab, much to my sister’s dismay.

She needs time with her new husband and to enjoy the honeymoon phase, unlike with her first marriage. However, a small part of me thinks they may have rushed a little bit. I mean, I know I told her to marry him, but not straight after her divorce is finalized. She was supposed to heal.

You can't get over what she went through within a few weeks, even if she knew what she was going into and I just hope she doesn’t turn against Tony if they argue.

I look up at the high-rise building and take a deep breath before walking towards it and up the steps, hoping I’m not making a big mistake.

Taylor has thirty minutes until he needs to leave for his game, and I plan on going with him. Having Hudson as well means he’ll have to drive his SUV, but somehow, I don’t think he’ll care.

I’m beginning to realize we’re his world, and while scary, that is a nice thought. I just hope he can forgive me for taking so long to give in.

“I’m telling you right now to unlock that elevator. I need to speak to my client!” a screech echoes as I walk into the building. I raise a brow when my eyes land on the she-witch glaring at the poor receptionist.

My eyes go over her, and I frown. Is that a trench coat?

Seriously, she was going to try the whole naked under-the-coat thing on a guy who has knocked her back for God knows how long?

Rolling my eyes, I walk with purpose to the elevators, hoping to bypass her but as I get just past her, Hudson decides to coo, making me internally groan when Elena turns her head my way.

She curls her lip and snaps, “You need to leave and take that brat with you; otherwise, I’ll call the police.”

I don’t talk back to her. Instead, I raise my head high and continue my path to the elevators while pulling my keys out of my pocket. When near, I press my keys against the pad, and the doors open. Hudson coos as I walk inside before I turn and lock eyes with Elena’s.

Her mouth is parted, her eyes full of anger. I smirk as I press the close button on the doors so she can’t try to get in. I wave at her before they shut, and her screams echo, making me laugh.

Okay, I have to admit, that was fun.

A few minutes later, I swallow hard as the doors ding open, and I walk out into Taylor’s massive living area, a room I haven’t been in since I snuck out that morning.

My eyes lock on him sitting on his couch, playing with something. His eyes come our way, and they widen in shock.

“Hey,” I whisper over Hudson’s coos, “I was wondering if you had room for two more in your car?”

I hold my breath and wait for his answer, hoping and praying I haven’t pushed him away.