Page 22

CHAPTER 22

ANNA

T he next morning, lying in bed, I replay the movie in my mind, which was the night before. It all seems surreal, like it never happened. I’m ready to put this behind me, all of it. As much as I can.

The smell of coffee hits my senses, telling me my dad is awake. And I get to race downstairs and tell him the good news. A quick time check tells me I’ve slept in a lot later than I normally do, which is about right. I didn’t get home until close to eleven, but made it to bed at midnight. However, sleep didn’t come until close to two.

While I wasn’t fibbing one hundred percent, I did bend things slightly so I could slip away. My dad texted me saying he didn’t feel well, but he only wanted me to know in case he stayed in bed in the morning. Sometimes if he’s not feeling great or hasn’t slept well, he’ll tell me so I know that he needs the house to be extra quiet in the morning so he can get a few hours extra shut eye.

But when his text came last night, I saw it as a sign from the Universe to go. In truth, I’m exhausted. Depleted. I had nothing left to give. I wanted to curl up in Ollie’s arms and have him tell me it was all okay, which he did. More than that, he and Ben got the whole team to agree to give their stolen money to my father.

When I realized what he’d done, I was thrilled. Excited. I felt like I was the “pick me!” girl, the chosen one, finally. The one that her man was moving heaven and earth to make sure that I was okay and safe, and so were those around me.

I realized last night that Ollie makes me feel more than special. He makes me feel seen. And heard. And respected.

And that I am so in love with him that it makes me shake inside and WOW. This. Is. Intense.

Sitting up, I stretch my arms overhead and think about the course of the morning. I’ll jump in the shower, then go downstairs to tell my dad about all the good things that are happening, then I’ll…

What, Anna? What’s next?

I can’t see any farther ahead than “call Ollie” or “go by Ollie’s.” Closing my eyes, I tug at my hair. It’s funny to think that Molly telling me about that other woman should have spun me out, but in reality, it didn’t. I’m not even worried about who it was because I know him. I know my man, my Ollie, and he’s not like that.

I also knew something inside had clicked in a forever kind of way for me because for the first time, ever, I did not trip out. I’ve had the glorious opportunity to date some amazing men in the past who, if I was told they were seen out somewhere with another woman, I knew instinctively that I was being played.

But not with Ollie. Our connection is different. It’s… more . There have been times in the past when being with someone, in a relationship, felt like death by a thousand tiny papercuts. Add in being sprayed by lemon water on top of it, and you get my drift. But not with Ollie. He’s like home-baked cookies beside a cozy fire on a blustery day. He’s a glass of lemonade, chock full of ice, that you sip on during a hot summer evening. He’s what I think I’ve always needed and I could not see it––until now.

And it scares me.

I put my feet on the floor, the coolness of the hardwood waking me up as I grab some clothes. Once I’m dressed, I pull a brush through my hair and head to the kitchen. I can’t wait to tell my father the good news.

I’m a few steps away when I hear his laugh, then his voice as it floats on the air and down the hall to greet me.

“Do you want milk with that?” he asks.

I can hear someone murmur a reply. Who’s here visiting with my dad now? He never talks to anyone but me before ten.

As I round the corner and walk into the kitchen my heart stops, a huge grin taking over my face so my cheeks hurt.

“Good morning,” Ollie says, sliding a pink bakery bag my way. “I stopped at Shelly’s Southern Sweets and got you an apple fritter.”

“Thank you,” I say, my eyes sliding over to my dad before I pull them back to Ollie. “Shouldn’t you be doing your lucky game-day routine?”

“We were just talking about that,” Ollie says, tilting his head toward my dad. “How sometimes we need to shake routines up so we don’t get stagnant.”

“He was also filling me in on last night’s shenanigans, young lady.” My dad hands me a cup of coffee. “I already added your cream.”

“Thanks,” I manage before taking a sip. I pull out a chair beside Ollie and settle into it. “What exactly was he telling you about?”

“All of it,” Ollie announces.

“Way to take the wind from my sails,” I tease. “I was going to come down here and tell him about the money myself.”

My dad perks up. “The money?”

Ollie laughs, looking my way. “I only told him about Jimmy trying to inflate the team’s value—not that we aren’t valuable, but you know,” he says with a wink. “I hadn’t gotten to the other part. I figured you’d want those honors.”

I bite back a grin and the urge to leap across the table and kiss him. Instead, I tell my dad the part that’s my favorite. The part where he finds out how much he’s valued by the team and the people he sees every day. The part where there’s going to be enough money in his account in a few days’ time that he’ll be able to truly relax and start again.

When I’m done, my father turns away to gather himself. When he spins around to face us, his eyes are filled with unshed tears. I love it when a man tries to fight his emotions, but I really love that I’m getting to see his smile through those tears, too.

“You. Did. All of this,” he says, waving a hand in the air at nothing in particular. “For your dad?”

“And I would do it again,” I say, lifting my mug in the air.

“Same,” Ollie chimes in, his hand sneaking under the table to squeeze my knee.

“I don’t know what to say.” He leans against the counter, looking at both of us with astonishment reflected in his eyes.

“Nothing,” Ollie says, pushing his chair back and walking around to my dad. “You deserve this and more. When I talked to the guys, they all agreed that we are truly all for one and one for all. We’re more than a team, Danny. We’re a family.”

Ollie looks back across the table at me, those blue-gray eyes of his shimmering with delight. “All of us.”

As my heart starts freaking out, Dad wipes the wet from his cheeks. “I need to wrap my head around this.” He chuckles. “I’m gonna take a walk to let it all sink in.”

He starts to leave the room, stopping to kiss the top of my head. “Also, you’re grounded.”

I stretch my arms up high from where I sit so I can snake my arms around his neck and give him a hug. “I love you.”

As the front door slams closed, Ollie walks over and pulls out a chair, pulling it close to mine.

“You took off,” he says. “Your dad told me it wasn’t really anything that required you to race home, so I can only guess it’s because of what Molly told you?”

I cock my head to the side and narrow my eyes. “How did you…Molly.” Of course. “She told you what she saw?”

Ollie nods. “It was my sister. Mia, the one you haven’t met.”

He watches me with his shoulders hiked up so they are level with his ears, a sure sign he’s worried.

“Okay,” I say.

“Okay?” He cocks his head to the side and studies me.

“Yes. Okay,” I say with a laugh. “It’s fine. I mean, obviously it is. It’s your sister.”

“But you left last night,” he points out.

“I did, because it was a lot.” I sit back in my chair. “The last few weeks have been fun but chaotic, and yesterday was insane. I started this whole drama in motion to help my dad, and for you. I needed to come home and take a minute to think about myself and what I want.”

Ollie scoots his chair closer to mine, taking my hand. I watch as he runs his fingertips across the back of my hand, tracing invisible lines. “And?”

“And…” I take my other hand and cover his, pulling him to me. “I know that the one thing that I’m happiest about is sitting here, right now, with me.”

“Really?”

“Yes, but,” I say as I swallow the lump in my throat, “I need time, Ollie. I need to take a step back from everything, and everyone, to look at what I want.”

“You want time?” Ollie’s forehead furrows with worry. “Like a long time or space to breathe time?”

“Space. I sat up last night thinking for a long time about what I need. For the past few weeks, I’ve put aside thoughts about myself to look for a way to help my dad and”—I lean in to rake my fingers through his hair and kiss the tip of his nose—“my best friend. And I wanted to do it. I started the whole thing in motion with my butting in, so please know that I’m well aware of the irony of my request. But like I said, it’s been intense. I hate even doing this, but there’s part of me that feels like we’d be crazy to not take a hot second to look around us and at what happened, make sure we’re still good before we do anything else.”

Ollie sits quietly, nodding his head as I talk. His body language shifted halfway through what I was saying, with his shoulders beginning to rise with tension.

“It has been a whirlwind,” he finally says after a minute of brooding silence. “And, I cannot lie, this is giving me whiplash, but I wouldn’t have wanted to have gone through it with anyone else but you.”

“Same––and I’m not going away, I am merely taking a moment to pause things.”

Ollie sits back in his chair, chewing on the side of his cheek as he fiddles with his hands nervously. He finally drags his eyes, blue-gray brilliance and all, to meet mine.

“Did what we have, well…is it what we did that scared you?” He asks the question so sweetly and so simply, my heart skips ten beats and goes into a palpitation overdrive.

“Yes, and no,” I manage to say as I put a hand on his thigh. I could be imagining things, but I swear he flexes it on purpose. “Look, my world was rocked from the moment you kissed me, and once we crossed a certain line, I knew that for me and my heart, I was never going back. Could never go back.” As Ollie grins at me, I squeeze his thigh again. “But, I—we were thrown together under such extraordinary?—”

“Circumstances,” he finishes with a whisper, nodding as if he now understands my hesitation. “So you want to step away and make sure it’s not some kind of Meisner acting method where you’ve fallen for me but you realize down the road it should never have happened?”

“Kind of,” I say with a chuckle as I stand up and pour myself a glass of water. My mouth is dry from my own nerves kicking in. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but I also didn’t think it would be this tough.

“So what do you need?” Ollie asks, spreading his hands out in front of him on the tabletop. “How much time?”

“I don’t know.” My answer is honest.

“Oh.”

“I’m sorry I can’t give you a timeline,” I say, walking back over to the table to sit beside him. “A few days, maybe longer. Time to be alone and to take care of some of my own computer tabs that are open in my mind.”

I look at him pointedly when I say that last part and am rewarded with a tiny grin.

“So some time away, huh?” He reaches out and takes my hand, pressing it to his lips. “I hate this. I hate that what we did has made you feel this way.”

“It’s not about us, though. At least not fully,” I say with a sigh. “It’s more. It’s about me being seen as Danny’s daughter. Or Ben’s assistant. And Ollie’s girlfriend. All titles, and I know it sounds so petty, but I don’t want to be someone’s descriptor. I want to be just ‘Anna whatever I am,’ you know?” I shake my head, horrified at my atrocious way of getting these words out. But at least they’re coming.

“Anna…” Ollie’s voice is low, apologetic.

“Don’t feel bad for me,” I say, wagging a finger his way. “It’s not about that, either. This is me, taking a minute to put myself first. I know I’m responsible for how I feel, so I’m gonna make sure how I feel is in line with who I want to be and what I want in the future.”

Ollie takes a giant breath of air and holds it in before letting it out in a giant whoosh.

“Okay, Anna,” he says, his voice dripping with sadness, which kills me. “I’ll go. I guess I’ll wait to hear from you?”

If I’m honest, I hadn’t thought that far ahead, and now I’m freaking out. But I have to do this for myself. So I nod and follow him, mimicking his movements as he rises from the table and heads to the front door.

The whole scene is playing out in slow motion. Horror movie slow motion, really, but again we stay the course. When Ollie gets to the front door, he stops and turns around, bending over to pick something up.

“I forgot,” he says, holding out a flat, square wrapped gift that looks suspiciously like an album. “It’s the record I picked up for you when we were gone.” He hands it to me. “It’s how I feel about you, how I always have, and I want you to have it no matter what comes out of your taking space. I know this was all to help me and Danny, but Anna, you have changed me for the better. I want you to know that your faith in me bled onto the ice, and I know the extra bounce I have in my step now is because of you. It’s our time we’ve spent together.”

My heart pounds in my chest. A flush creeps across my cheeks, but I keep my eyes trained on the album in my hands. I’m afraid if I look at him, I’ll cry.

“Thank you.”

Ollie leans down and kisses my cheek sweetly. He lets his lips linger for a moment before he pulls away and opens the door.

“Please understand I’m not going away.” My voice is barely audible. “I just need a little time.”

He nods, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Talk soon?”

I swallow another lump that’s threatening to form in the back of my throat as I nod. “Yeah. We’ll talk soon.”

I watch as he walks down the sidewalk to his car, staying put like he always does for me until I see him get inside and pull away.

And then I close the front door behind me and bang my body against it.

I hope I’m doing the right thing.