Page 73 of Everything Is Probably Fine

“We’ve gone well past the baking badge. He’s so proud of his field notebook, he’s making notes about everything,” Seth said. He collected Bean’s empty cup as Lorna dug into the chocolate gelato Seth had purchased for her. He’d insisted, said as she’d provided the entertainment, it was only fair that he provide the ice cream.

“I don’t know,” Lorna had said. “We’re not really friends like that.”

“Nonsense,” Seth said easily. “We are friends exactly like that. And for real, Lorna, are you always so hard on everyone?”

“You know what? I think I am.”

He laughed. “Okay, well, maybe try not to be so hard on me? Just accept that we are friends. Got it?”

“Got it.” She was ridiculously pleased with this banter. It made her feel like a living, breathing woman. Not a King Kong.

When they were seated on the deck under the tree canopy, Seth said, “So Mr. Sanders was a teacher? The musical was good.”

Lorna snorted with a mouthful of ice cream and said thickly, “No, it wasn’t.”

Seth grinned. “Yeah, I can’t lie. It was subpar, and you were sort of terrible.”

“Terrible!” she agreed. “Thank you for not trying to gaslight me.”

“Oh, I don’t think I could,” Seth said. “Too many witnesses.”

She laughed. She was amazed by it, this hearty laugh coming from her chest. She’d been crying for so long—this felt good.

“I am curious, however,” Seth said. “What is this all about? I mean, really.”

For a moment, Lorna was confused and thought he meant her reluctance to join the fight to save the house. “I just think it’s really a house and not four shitty apartments.”

“Not that,” Seth said. “While I agree they are indeed four shitty apartments, I’m talking about the apology tour. I don’t get it. And honestly, I guess I’m asking about your friendship with my son.”

Lorna froze. The pleasure she’d just been feeling began to fade away. This was exactly what she’d feared, so why was she surprised he would find something wrong with her?

“Don’t get me wrong,” Seth said quickly. “I’m grateful for it. Bean misses his mother and he’s lonely. He considers you and Aggie his friends. But it’s different when you think of a grown woman hanging out with a kid she’s not related to.”

Lorna felt her soul curling into a ball. She put down her ice cream. Here is where he would tell her that it was too odd, thatshe couldn’t hang out with Bean, that it just didn’t make sense. She thought of the blue vest she’d ordered that had arrived today. Would he at least allow her to sew on the badges?

Seth’s face crinkled into a frown. “I think I’m making a mess of this. I’m curious, that’s all.”

“No, no, I get it,” Lorna said. “You’re getting an ick vibe.”

“No, that’s not—”

“But Bean is the first friend I’ve had in a very long time.” There, she said it.

“Oh.” He looked even more alarmed now.

“I didn’t mean that to sound like I’m sure it does. I just mean that Bean accepts me as I am. It’s nice.”

Seth’s gaze shifted to the playground, and to Bean, who was organizing a small army of younger children. “I don’t think there’s anything strange going on, if that’s what you think,” he said. “I know my kid is pretty remarkable.”

“He really is,” Lorna said quietly. She wished she had words to explain that no one had been able to crack open her bomb shelter for years, but Bean had managed to do it without even trying. “As to what this is?” She thought of herself in the float tank and wondered if she ought to make herself more vulnerable. She didn’t want to do anything that would cause her to lose Seth as a friend, and she didn’t think she could bear to lose Bean as one. “I had some trauma early on in my life.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“My sister was an addict. Like, aseriousaddict. You know, the kind you see on documentaries about drug use in America.”

“Wow,” Seth said, clearly startled.

“Don’t worry, she’s in Florida and therefore unable to be a poor influence on anyone around here.”