Page 67 of Everything All at Once

“I just wanted to say hi.”

“Next time, text me.”

“Have you ever been to New Canaan?”

“No.”

“Is there a Canaan? Is there an Old Canaan?”

“I was sleeping, Lottie.”

“Do you think people are inherently good or evil?”

“Are we doing this now? Are you really trying to do this now?”

“I don’t mean that in a weird way. Like, just off the top of your head.”

“You’re killing me.”

“What do you think happens after you die?”

Abe, who had shut his eyes, now cracked one open. He looked at me in the long, hard way only a sibling is capable of looking at another sibling. Like:I love you so much, but I also kind of want to kill you.

“Lottie,” he said.

“Abe.”

“Do you want to maybe talk about this later?”

“I’m about to leave.”

“Where are you going?”

“To New Canaan. With Sam.”

“What’s in New Canaan?”

“I don’t know. I thought you might.”

Abe pulled himself up, rubbing at his eyes. “Lottie, are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Let’s play croquet again. Whenever you get back, we’ll play croquet.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

“With flamingoes?”

“If you can train them properly.”

He ducked back under the covers and pulled them over his head until I could only see his hair. I ran my fingertips over the spines of all his books. New and old. History and present. Then I let myself out of his room and went down to the car. I texted Sam:

I’m on my way.

He texted back immediately: