Page 24 of Enchanted with the Orc (The Kingverse Orcs #4)

Tasia

I ’ m such a coward.

The thought ran through my head as I made my way back to my daughter. It was the closest to the truth that I could get.

Especially when he acted like he was already a part of our tiny family.

After today, after watching him with my daughter, it was getting harder and harder to lie to myself about my feelings for him.

And the way she’d said that he was her daddy…

It took everything in me not to take her and run again.

I couldn’t have her loving this male. He would hurt us, just like David had.

Just like every other male I’d let into my life.

I wasn’t sure if he meant to, but he was wearing me down with his charms. He was the sweetest male I’d ever met and I wanted to jump his bones at every turn. I didn’t feel attraction like normal females. Not anymore. Not after David.

I wasn’t sure if it was related to trauma or if it was a part of my sexuality that was only just showing itself. I could find a male to be attractive externally, but it didn’t affect me. There were good-looking beings everywhere. But I hadn’t felt heat like this since… ever.

Even with David, I was certain that my initial attraction to him was more related to what he represented than who he was.

I swallowed hard, keeping focused on my daughter as I made my way over to the food tables, determined to neaten up and pack goody bags so I could distract myself from my train of thought.

When Enka made his way over, wordlessly helping me, but keeping a keen eye on Gabbi as well, I huffed out a breath.

Damn him for being hot and perfect. As if I wasn’t already confused.

Enka slid a look my way after I huffed, a mysterious smile playing on his lips and I wanted to bite him. To scratch him. To force him down to my height with his tusks so I could finally taste him. Heat flooded my cheeks at the thought, but I was too worked up to care.

“I know you said you want to be my friend,” I said in a low voice, moving closer to him so none of the children could hear. “But I need you to be honest with me. What’s your game? Why are you being this way with me? With Gabbi?”

He frowned for a long moment before shaking his head. “Being what way?” he asked, leaning in even closer so we were only inches apart .

I didn’t pull away the way I usually would. Instead, I stayed close and let his scent surround me, weakening my resolve. “I know what you’re doing,” I insisted, eyes narrowed. “I just don’t know why .”

“What am I doing?” he asked, his gaze softening into something mild, amused and understanding.

I paused for a long moment, wondering how insane I was going to sound, before deciding I didn’t care.

I was fed up holding back the real me. And whether or not she was a distrustful lunatic, he was going to get her.

“You’re trying to trick me,” I blurted, tipping my chin up in challenge. “You’re being all nice now so that you’ll get me to agree to do whatever it is you want. And then you’ll…” I swallowed hard, and wasn’t prepared for the punch of his words.

“And then I’ll change and become just like him.”

I didn’t expect the tears that pooled in my eyes, but I nodded. With a deep sigh, I was in his arms, his big palm cradling my head against his hard chest.

“I know you’re hurt,” he murmured into my hair, taking a deep breath, his huge body shuddering under my palms that were pressed to his chest—ready to push away—and I’d found myself clinging to him instead.

“But I don’t want anything from you other than to let me be here with you.

Supporting you.” His dark, intense eyes roamed over my face before they flicked to mine.

“And our Gruk-ir.” There was a long pause and his fingers clenched in my hair. It felt involuntary. “Please.”

My stupid heart was opening for him—blooming in a way that I couldn’t begin to understand.

It was my turn to study him. And I did. For a long, long time.

The hope brimming off of him scalded me with its sincerity.

Still, I didn’t respond right away. I mulled over the idea of letting him in. Of actually giving him my full trust.

“I don’t want a relationship,” I explained, testing.

He nodded, tucking an unruly curl behind my ear. “That’s fine,” he whispered. “However you want me. Whatever you need. That’s what I’ll give you.”

The screeching sound of another huge barrier being opened inside of me made its way through my head. If I wasn’t careful, he would make it all the way through. And then what? Then he would decide that he didn’t want anything to do with me, my tiny broken family and the drama of my husband.

“I’m married,” I told him, taking a deep breath. “Legally.”

He nodded, his expression soft and open, listening and not judging.

“I’m really not interested in anything other than friends. I… can’t.”

“Then we’ll be friends,” he breathed, as if it was the easiest decision in the world. As if it wasn’t a life-changing decision that would flip over my entire worldview of males.

“Okay,” I gasped, burying my face against his chest, holding on for dear life, and letting a tear slide down my cheek. In his arms, I was protected and safe.

It feels so good. I wish I could stay here forever.

The little missile slamming into our legs would have mowed me down if I wasn’t securely pressed against him.

Instead, my little clinging monkey of a daughter made her way up our legs, aided by Enka’s giant palm.

She snuggled herself between us and I pressed a kiss to her soft hair the same time Enka did.

Our eyes met and we were so close together I could see the little lines of his irises.

Goddess Mother, he could hurt me so bad.

“Abu and Mommy were hugging,” Gabbi said with a smug note to her tone and I knew that the sweet little gremlin was plotting something. “Good.”

“Good, huh?” I asked, pulling away to tickle her and she screamed with laughter, scrambling up Enka like he was a tree and clinging to his neck. He held her with a big hand under her and she fit so well into it, it was almost as if he’d been made to keep her safe.

Ignoring my fanciful thoughts, I told Gabbi, “Your Abu and I decided that we’ll be friends.”

She frowned, her little brow scrunching and her nose crinkling. “Friends can’t have babies,” she said with firm knowledge as if she was an expert.

“Babies?” I squawked, my eyes wide. “What’re you talking about?”

“I want a little sister,” she said, releasing Enka’s neck and folding her arms over her chest—very reminiscent of when I was scolding her. “And you can’t be friends for that. You have to be a mommy and daddy.”

I would have been less shocked if she’d suddenly announced that she was leaving for college. “We’re not having a baby,” I gasped, turning around to make sure none of the other children were listening. And they weren’t. They were running around in a mad post-cake haze of sugar-induced fervor.

“I want a sister,” she demanded again, and I looked at Enka, at my wit’s end. But I didn’t get the reaction I expected from him. Instead, he was nodding, thoughtfully, as if considering it.

“Why not a brother?” he asked, and I threw my hands up in the air, stalking off to clean the rest of the table in an angry flurry of movements.

“Mommy’s mad,” Gabbi said in a loud whisper to Enka. “We should go play in case she wants to yell at us.”

I rolled my eyes while they snuck off.