Page 24

I wake up, and as I lie in bed staring up at the ceiling, the only thing I can think is that I love that stupid man. But there are days, like today, that I wish I didn’t. Life would be so simple then. We could continue our not-real marriage, and no one would care if the other was caught kissing someone else.

“But I do care,” I mutter.

I linger in bed all morning and then take a leisurely shower. By the time I’m bopping down the stairs in running shorts and a loose sweatshirt, it’s almost one o’clock.

I expect Easton will be off doing something, but when I step into the kitchen, he’s standing over by the counter making a sandwich.

Ugh, I was hoping to avoid him for a while, fearing that things might be weird today.

But when Easton hears me and turns around, he’s smiling like our late-night discussion never happened.

Or that it hasn’t changed a thing.

I hope that’s the case.

“Someone sure slept in,” he remarks teasingly.

“I know.” I take a seat at the table as he resumes putting together his sandwich. “I’m just feeling kind of lazy today.”

He replies, “No worries. Everyone deserves a lazy day here and there.” Glancing over his shoulder, he asks. “Are you hungry? Do you want a sandwich too?”

“What kind are you having?” I ask.

“Just some turkey breast and cheese on wheat bread.”

I nod. “Sounds good. I’ll have one.”

“You got it.”

Easton finishes with the sandwiches and joins me at the table.

I’m so glad we’re back to normal.

But as we’re eating, and though our conversation is chill, I can’t shake the feeling that something is different.

There’s an underlying tense vibe in the air.

It could just be me, though. I feel more attracted to Easton than ever right now. I keep stealing glances over at him, admiring how hard his biceps and pecs look in the tight T-shirt he has on.

And the light blue color of the shirt really brings out his eyes.

He’s also wearing cargo shorts, and it’s all I can do to not reach over and place my hand on his thigh.

It’s like my body is daring me to make a move.

I want him more today than I think I ever have. To feel his body on mine, skin to skin, and to feel him inside me.

“Ugh!” I place the sandwich I’ve barely touched back on the plate.

“What’s wrong?” Easton asks, looking genuinely perplexed.

“Nothing.” I close my eyes and wave my hand around. “I just felt a little sick there for a minute,” I lie.

Come on, it’s not like I can tell him I’m lusting for him like never before.

What if he wants to act on it?

I would.

Oh, I would.

I have no more control or will to say no.

But I must be strong.

Our whole friendship could be ruined.

Damn it, though, I want more.

I want Easton in all ways.

I want him to be in love with me like I am with him. And I want to make love, not fuck. Well, okay, I want that too. But not just that.

Frustrated, I say, “You know what? I think I need some fresh air.”

I push my chair back and stand, and Easton asks, “Do you want me to come with you?”

Normally, I would say, “Sure,” but right now, I need to be alone.

Shaking my head, I tell him, “No, that’s okay. Finish your sandwich.”

With the look he’s giving me, it’s clear he knows something is wrong.

It is wrong.

Everything is wrong.

And I have no idea how to ever make it right again.