Page 96 of Devious Love
“Coach McDermott called. We’re meeting next Friday to talk about the assistant coach position.”
“I’m so happy for you.” She plants a tender kiss on my cheek then cups my face. “And I’m proud of you. Living on your own, helping your dad, working your ass off to open your own shop—I always knew you had a bright future ahead of you.”
The waitress who took our orders—Leslie, according to her nametag—returns to the table. “Mia, you’ve got a customerasking for a refill.” She tilts her head, signaling to a couple sitting a few tables away.
“Sorry.” With one more peck to my cheek, she stands. “I have work to do.”
While we eat, I ask Miles about Chiara, but he skirts the subject, so I let it go, mostly because my mind is full of thoughts of Mia.
From the moment she came back to Monterey, my life has improved. Work is going well. Dad has agreed to support us as we branch out—and from the look of things, we may have our first client, and I have a place of my own, just like I wanted.
But for Mia? Every day is like a battlefield. She works her ass off here and at school, and she deals with Monica’s bullshit constantly. Thanks to me. I’m part of the reason she’s barely keeping her head above water.
As Miles rambles on, I pick up my soda and chug the last of it, hoping it’ll ease the dryness in my throat.
My gut twists as thoughts I’ve been pushing out of my mind surface. She might be my blessing, but I’m her curse. I’m just another burden, but I want to be as supportive of her as she is of me.
She catches me watching her from across the diner and breaks into a quick smile before she focuses on a group of high schoolers who just sat down.
I sigh and force myself to listen to Miles.
There’s no fucking way I can walk away from her.
CHAPTER 26
thank you for being you
MIA
Age 19
November
For the firsttime in weeks, I have an entire day to myself. Well, kind of. I don’t have class, and I’m not scheduled to work at Luigi’s. It’s a rare kind of day. I enjoy it all, really—meeting new people at the diner, seeing my friends, working on designs. I’ve even started freelancing and drawing character art. I’m earning money, which is a huge plus for my plans to spend at least part of the summer in Italy.
The catch? I’m exhausted. All the time. And I don’t see Dominic enough. He’s at Allan’s shop all day, and then he and Miles spend their evenings working on their very first custom bike. As proud as I am of his talent, and as happy as I am that they’re making their dreams come true, I miss him.
Everyone wants me to stop and take a breath, to quit my job at Luigi’s or take fewer commissions from the group of authors I’ve been illustrating for. Dad, Matt, Dom, and even Allan insist I’m working too hard, and they’ve all offered to give me money, but there’s no way I’ll take it.
Maybe it’s pride that has me pushing myself like this. Maybe it’s stupidity. I just don’t want to take the easy way out. I never have. All my life, Mom has reminded me nothing is ever given freely. Approval and respect are earned, and so is love.
With her, everything is a transaction. When I was a kid, if I was good, she’d take me for ice cream. If I was quiet, she’d take me shopping. But if I messed up? Got into a little mischief? I would end up on the receiving end of her scorn. Being treated poorly while my sibling could do no wrong was hard, especially because I love my brother so much. I’ve never resented him for it, but I can’t say the same about Mom.
God, I had such high hopes for our relationship when I returned, but she quickly fell back into the pattern of constantly blaming and criticizing me. And after the truth about my relationship with Dom came out? I no longer have the motivation to make my relationship with Mom work.
Instead, I work too much. I drag myself out of bed even on days my body begs me to stop. Because I can’t stop now. Every step forward, every good grade, every buck I earn—it’s proof I can stand on my own two feet, that I don’t need to beg for her love or her approval to be happy. That’s also why I don’t let anyone help me. The last thing I want is to give her my weakness on a silver platter, to admit she was right.
Hell no. I’d never give her that power.
If I wasn’t so desperate to visit my dad, I’d use my savings for a deposit on an apartment like Dominic did.
I’m halfway through outlining my game design project when my bedroom door opens behind me. The sound halts my thoughts, and I look over my shoulder.
Speak of the devil. Mom’s here, and the look on her face tells me everything I need to know. Nothing good will come of this.
She crosses her arms over her chest. “Mrs. Ackerman saw you with Dominic.”
“Hi to you too, Mom,” I quip, tamping down the hurt threatening to bloom inside me. “But I’m a little busy at the moment, so we’ll have to talk later.”
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