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Chapter Thirty-Four

Ophelia

I shouldn’t humor him. I shouldn’t go along with this. The ceremony is tomorrow, and I’ll be free. Free to go back to my life. I’ll never see Sebastian or Eve or Quinn again, and this place will be a distant, weird memory I’ll never dare to speak of, even with my therapist.

I should feel a rush of joy at the prospect, but I don’t. I run my finger around the collar. It fits perfectly, of course. Sebastian is such an odd mix of chaos and thoughtful consideration. I scan the collection of tags again and, for a guilty second, allow myself to imagine what life would be like if I stay.

Waking up every day with a shackle on my ankle. Knowing, every moment of every day, my body doesn’t belong to me, that whatever Sebastian wants to do to me, he will. A deep, needy shiver runs through me at the thought. He can be cruel, but he always seems to know what I need to hear. The right bit of praise to make me melt .

Dressing in the clothes he gives me. They felt shameful at first, but there’s something liberating about them, too. He’s showing me off because he wants to, and in this place, no one cares. No one judges. I imagine going back to the prissy suits I’m obliged to wear outside, and it’s more restrictive than the collar at my throat.

I’ll miss the girls, friends that don’t expect anything from me and who share the rawest details of their lives without shame. Back home, I have to put on the same act with all my acquaintances. Everything is wonderful. Business is great. It’s what I’ve always wanted.

“Pet?” Sebastian’s smooth voice. He puts so much into that one word. There’s a nervous edge to him now, though. He cares what I think of the collar, insane as it sounds.

“What do you mean, it doesn't come off?”

He reaches his hand to the back of my neck and touches the spot where a catch should be. “It’s coded to my DNA. Only I can remove it. And if you stay, I won’t. Ever.” He trails his finger around the smooth metal to my throat. “Do you like it?”

“It’s beautiful” comes out far easier than it should. His body relaxes underneath me. He wanted me to love it.

When was the last time someone gave me a gift and cared what I thought about it? Every year for birthday and Christmas, Dad gets me something suitable chosen by one of his assistants. Diamond earrings or a designer bracelet. Nice, and I’m grateful for them all, but it’s never anything tailored just for me.

Sebastian ducks his head and lands a kiss on my forehead. My body warms at the touch of his lips, and it’s almost a disappointment when he says, “Come on. We’ll try out your new leash. I’ll walk you to the med center for your shift.”

My shift? I’d expected him to cancel it, given today is my last day. “You still want me to go? ”

“Of course. It’s important to you, so it’s important to me. I hear you’ve been learning a lot. If you stay, maybe you can take your medical exams in a few years. I’ll get you a tutor.”

He’s planning ahead. Planning for a life together. He can’t really imagine I’ll stay, can he? But again, there’s that tug in my chest. I haven’t seen Wade since our first meeting, and instead, elderly doctor Richard has been teaching me a lot. Yesterday, a Ward came in with a broken arm, and I helped set the bone.

I’ve enjoyed it more than I’ve enjoyed anything for a while. Well, apart from some of the things Sebastian has made me do.

“Go on. Stop daydreaming.” Sebastian tweaks my nipple through the thin fabric of the dress and drags my mind back to the room. “Get ready. You may put on your work outfit.”

I’m allowed sensible clothes just for the med center. Because, Sebastian says, some of the Brothers are ancient, and seeing me in next to nothing would give them heart failure. I inject a sarcastic edge into my voice. “Oh. Thank you so much for the privilege.”

“And that attitude just lost you your underwear. I hope it’s not too cold in the med center.”

Shit. I hop off his knee and head to the bedroom before I can get in any more trouble. As soon as I enter, the mirror stops me in my tracks. I stare at myself, fascinated by the collar. The training collar, clunky and over-the-top as it was, always looked like a prop, something from someone’s kinky fantasy, not anything to do with real life.

This is different. It hugs my throat, the color a perfect complement to my hair. It shimmers as I move, such a perfect fit it looks painted on. When I told him it was beautiful, I only meant it in the abstract—a pretty object. But seeing it on myself, I really feel it. I love the way it looks against my skin. The way it feel s

He’ll have to take it off before I leave.

Before I can spend too much time thinking about it, Sebastian appears. “It’s very pretty, but you’ve got work to do. And I wasn’t kidding about the underwear.”

Once I’m dressed, he clips the new leash to the collar. This, I’m still not used to and might never be. Not that I’ll have much chance to acclimatize in the time I’ve got left. It’s a thin, silvery chain which, he informs me, is strong enough to hold a two-hundred-pound weight suspended.

“Is this really necessary?” My skin heats as he wraps the chain around his hand and gives me a gentle tug. “I’m not going to run away.”

“I know. But having you at the end of my leash is the best part of my day.” He flashes me his wickedest grin.

“But Dr. Richard—”

“Is under no illusions about your status and doesn’t give a flying fuck about it. No one here does. Come.”

Another tug on the lead, and my stomach flips over in the strange mix of shame and need I’m starting to find addictive. What will Sebastian have planned for me when this shift is over? Maybe something special, as it’s our last night together.

My mind turns through the possibilities as he leads me to the med center and gives me a kiss, unclipping the chain. “I’ll be back in three hours. Be good.”

“Yes, sir.” I still stammer over the words, but they come easier every day.

Wade greets me, eyes sharp as Sebastian retreats. “Thank fuck. It’s been a nightmare trying to get any time with you. The old fucking coot thinks you’re a natural at this.”

He rolls his eyes like we’re sharing a joke, and I have to work to keep my face straight. Screw him. It’s not a damn joke. But I push it to the back of my mind—I’ve been dying to see Wade for one important reason. “My father. Have you seen him? How is he holding up?”

My brother deserved what happened ten times over, but it will have hit my dad hard. I’ve been thinking of him grieving alone. He doesn’t have anyone.

Wade teeters his hand from side to side. “You know your dad never shows what he’s feeling. I honestly think he’s more disappointed than anything. He thought Harrison was too smart to go rogue like that. And he’s said for years that shit with Maggie would come back to haunt your brother. I guess he never expected it to happen like this, though.”

It takes a second for the words to sink in—casual throwaway words delivered by someone who doesn’t know me. Who has no interest in me whatsoever, aside from keeping in my dad’s good books. “He knew? My dad knew what Harrison did?”

Wade gives me an odd look. “Of course he did. He needed your old man to make sure he was covered in case Maggie’s dad went to the cops. He didn’t, though. Your dad paid him off.”

A wave of dizziness hits, and I take a seat on one of the patient chairs. Years. I suffered with guilt for years, and my dad knew all about it. He comforted me, in his brusque way, and told me it wasn't my fault Maggie was weak. But never, not once, did he tell me the truth.

The truth that could have changed my life.

Before I can ask any more questions, the door bangs open, admitting two middle-aged men, one supporting the other as he limps along. “Accident on the Squash court,” the supporting man says. “Hope it’s not broken.”

Wade smiles, snapping right into doctor mode. “Let’s get that looked at. Ophelia, bring the stretcher over.”

For the next three hours, I’m kept busy by a steady stream of minor ailments and injuries. When the last patient—cluster headaches, poor lady—leaves, Wade breathes a sigh of relief. “Fuck’s sake. Thought we’d never get a minute. You actually are pretty good at this.”

“Thanks.” I smile at the compliment, but he’s already moved on.

“Anyway, it doesn’t matter. Nothing does, except what I’m about to tell you. You need to play up at the ceremony. Whatever he’s told you to do, don’t do it. Swear at him, run for it, cause a scene, whatever. Just don’t behave.”

I nod. Old news, but Wade carries on. “The top cluster of assholes here, the ruling council or whatever the fuck they call themselves, made a deal. If you fuck up, you get sent home to Daddy.” He leans forward, lowering his voice. “Along with pretty boy’s head.”

He sits back, smug and satisfied. “What do you think of that? Don’t ask me what I had to do to get that info.”

I open my mouth, and it takes a minute before I can stammer out, “Sebastian’s head?”

“Yep. In a fucking box, like some mafia movie. Your dad insisted on it. Badass, right? Imagine walking into your dad’s house holding that. The man who killed his son. Don’t forget to mention I gave you the tip-off.”

I turn away, and my face must have showed my dismay, as Wade frowns. “What’s wrong? Don’t tell me it’s made you queasy. You’re a Calder, Ophelia. This sort of shit is in your blood.”

“I’m just tired. Didn’t sleep well.” It sounds fake and dead in my ears, but Wade shrugs and gets to his feet.

“Don’t worry. Only one more day to get through, and then you’re safe. Your dad’ll never let anything happen to you again.”

It’s one last blow in a day full of them. He’ll keep me locked up forever. I’ll be a princess in a fucking tower, only allowed out with bodyguards. My dad, who could have saved me from years of guilt but chose not to. Who watched me cry over Maggie and never said a word.

My dad, who demanded Sebastian’s head in a box.

What the fuck is wrong with him? Wade starts tidying the room, and I try to wring some sense out of the conversation. My dad made a deal with the Brotherhood, but his main goal isn’t my release. Oh no. His goal is revenge. Taking out the man who wronged the family.

Not me.

It was never me, was it?

Never.

Did he ever put me first? I wrack my brain, searching for a single incident. For just one time he considered what I wanted above himself. Above the family. Above Harrison. Above the opinions of people he wanted to impress.

I try and try and try.

Nothing.

And now he wants Sebastian dead. Wait. I glance at the door—no sign of him yet. “Wade.”

“Yeah?” He pauses tidying a cupboard and looks over.

“Does Sebastian know? Does he know what’ll happen to him if I don’t complete the ceremony?”

Wade smirks. “Yep. He must be shitting himself.”

He knew. All this time, he knew, and he told me how to free myself anyway. Why? Does he have some other agenda I don’t know about? Or is it possible, just maybe, that he cares that much?

That he wants me to be happy and is willing to sacrifice himself for it?

The door opens, and Sebastian steps through, a big smile on his face and my leash in his hand.