Page 10

Kenna

Pulling into the Desert King’s clubhouse parking lot used to make me instantly happy. As I pulled the emergency brake and shut the little truck off I tried to find that place again. For what seemed like half my life this place had been like a second home.

I could distinctly remember begging David to let me stay late after events, trotting around behind the younger guys, wanting to party with them, because they were so exciting. And yeah, some still were.

Others, not so much.

And of course, Ghost was here. He’d done nothing but lick boots since Preacher left. I could draw my own assumptions as to why and what went down.

Puck had said things were better. Dylan had called and said things were more like before Archer died. Emphasized I should come by, since Cam and Riley were home. I missed her. Riley, too. Hanging out with the two of them were some of the happiest memories of my life.

Was I really letting shame keep me from that?

I hadn’t been back. Not since that night. Hadn’t seen Cam at all and had avoided Riley save for the occasional text message I’d be a bitch to ignore.

Snatching the new gauges from my purse, I hopped out of the truck and slammed the door behind me. There was a time I belonged here. Nadine was trying her best to make sure I didn’t. Another layer added to the mess.

My stomach tightened and I swallowed back the sick feeling. I’d been invited, not to mention I needed Puck’s help. The barbells were loose now, snagging on shit, and it hurt. But my fingers trembled too much if I tried to change them.

Plus…a part of me wanted to see him. It had been almost a month.

The music was weekend loud, pumping out from the large speakers, and thundering through the parking lot.

The clubhouse itself reminded me of an expensive roadhouse bar.

Mostly one giant room on the bottom floor, with a kitchen and bar on one side and the tribute hall and conference sort of room on the other side.

They called that room The Chapel and it was the only room in the place I’d never been in.

If you weren’t an officer, you didn’t go in.

Archer’s bike still held a place of prominence in the very center, bisecting the pool tables from the stage and seating areas. Sometimes Puck set up a tattoo station there, especially at big events and when guys got patched in, because their Desert Kings tattoo came immediately after the patch.

All these things ran through my head as I tried to remember a time when I loved it here. When I didn’t feel like all the heads that turned were judging me for what I’d done. Hell, I hadn’t even spoken to Cam since that night. I was terrified to.

“Hold the fuck up,” a familiar, jovial voice called from the seating area. Jester was tall, probably an inch or two taller and leaner than Puck. His long legs ate up the smooth wooden floor as he advanced on me. “Who do we have here?”

I had a few seconds to brace myself before he snatched me up, tossed me over a tattooed shoulder, and spun me like a little kid. So much for not drawing extra attention. My laughter was instantaneous, his joy contagious.

“Good to see you, Kenna.” He dropped me and tucked me against his chest, swaying to the music, and dropping a kiss to my head. “Where you been?”

“Working.” Not a lie. “Trying to get the fuck out of David’s place.”

“That bad?” He cast a sideways glance to where Nadine held court with the older, played-out patch bunnies. Then took a pull from the dark, imported beer bottle. “Bitches.”

“You have no idea.” I shook my head and shrugged. Jester was one of those guys who was too hot for his own good. And he knew it, so he was cocky but in an almost adorable way. And he was a fuck all good kisser.

“Yo, Probie. I need another beer,” he half shouted at Ghost.

I flinched, looking away before he could catch my eye. “He yours now?”

Jester snorted and nodded, but said nothing about Preacher or his absence.

“That bad, huh?” I tossed his words back at him and slid under his arm, hugging his side. Ever so slightly, the proverbial bandage was sliding off without ripping at my skin.

“Nothing I can’t handle.”

I elbowed him in the stomach, unwound myself from his embrace, and looked around for Puck. “Where’s the big guy?”

“Out back, got a fire going. Want me to go get him?” He studied me like he could see right through me. Then, like he found what he was looking for, the corner of his mouth twitched.

That was the thing with Jester. Around the arrogance and all his jokes, there was something deeper, darker, and far more intelligent than a lot of people gave him credit for. Truth be told, I think he liked it that way. Especially around here.

They didn’t hand out seats at the Desert Kings’ table to idiots. No matter how sexy they were.

“I’m good.” I squeezed him a little tighter. Another reason I’d stayed away. Not just avoiding David’s new girl, but avoiding those who’d seen what I’d done to myself that night. “I promise.”

Pulling myself away from Jester was hard.

Not because I could still remember the way he’d kissed me.

But because I felt safe there. In that same vein, it was easier to go outside and face Puck than Riley…

or Cam Savage. Archer’s daughter had breezed into Dry Valley like a breath of fresh air, and then saved my life as much as Puck had.

I paused, my hand on the handle to the back door. I hadn’t seen Cam since that night, on purpose. But I’d missed Riley so much, I was willing to chance his ire. I almost walked to the bar, where he leaned on an elbow talking with someone.

Cam Savage wasn’t an immediately imposing figure like Puck or even Jester.

But he was close to six feet, with blond hair cropped short on the sides and slicked back from his face.

What made him scary was the sharp edge to everything he did.

He was handsome, but then he’d smile and you knew immediately he’d done terrible things and it wouldn’t take much for him to do them again.

When he saw me, his blue gaze caught mine and held. I waited a breath. Months ago, my self-sabotaging partying had tugged his ole lady into something dangerous. He probably hated me for that. Or at least, had shit to say that I didn’t think I could handle hearing.

Then he surprised me. His lips slid into an easy smile, and he gestured me over to the bar in a way that told me I shouldn’t have been worried about anything at all.

He sat his beer bottle down and called over his shoulder. I couldn’t hear his words, but his lips formed the hard ‘r’ sound. Riley. By the time she slipped through the swinging kitchen door, tears stung the back of my eyes.

I was moving as soon as she was and dropped my bag on the stool between Cam and Merc. Riley squealed over the music and hugged me, hard. She smelled like sunshine and all things happy. I hadn’t seen her in months and had to fight back tears.

“Hey, hey.” She pulled back with a big, happy smile. “You look great. Purple now?” She flipped the dyed ends of my dark hair.

“Yeah.” But what she didn’t ask was how I really was.

Which, now that she was here, was pretty damn amazing.

I hugged her again. I didn’t have many friends, never had.

Sure, there were people I knew, people I was friendly with.

But Dylan and Riley were the first real girlfriends in my whole life. I’d missed them terribly.

The shame in my actions was real, but the less weight it carried the longer she held me and smiled. But when I looked at Cam, I remembered what I almost cost him. Because I was angry, stupid, and didn’t think about anyone but myself.

“I’m so sorry, Cam.” This time, the tears did trickle out. I released Riley and swiped at them with the back of my hand.

“Jesus. Fuck.” He stood, wrapped me in a hug, and continued to mumble cuss words under his breath. “Shit happens. But that ain’t you.” He glowered over my shoulder and across the room. I didn’t need to look to know he’d seen Ghost. “It’s on him, and some of it on me. Look at me…”

I looked up into his gaze, which was serious. There’d been a reason I’d turned to Cam before everything went down with Ghost, the reason I told him shit I didn’t tell anyone. It was that look, the loyalty and the promise to kick the ass of anyone who tried to hurt those he loved.

“No one deserves to be taken advantage of like that. Ever. Hear me?” He meant the college punks who’d drugged me, tried to rape me, and who’d hurt Riley.

And paid the ultimate price for it.

I couldn’t love him more if he’d been born my brother. “Thanks.”

He mussed my hair and pushed me back at Riley. “Go do girl shit, while I pretend I didn’t see you crying. Jesus.”

I wasn’t crying now but snorted a laugh and mock kicked him in the shin. Puck was right, everything was as it should be. Then I turned back to Riley, snatching up my bag and sliding my arm through the crook of hers. “Let’s go fix my makeup, and I can show you my new jewelry.”

Her eyes widened. “Where is it?”

I giggled and waggled my eyebrows.

“Oh, lord.” She sighed but laughed.

Upstairs, she veered off to the right to the larger of the bedrooms. This one, at different periods of time, had been Cam and Merc’s.

“Remember when my brother lived up here?” Dylan walked in behind us.

Unlike Riley, I didn’t figure she’d go for the hug, but she surprised me with a quick squeeze that told me everything was going to be okay “I always had to put a hand over my eyes before I came in. That was after he got back and during his wild time.”

“You mean he’s not still wild?” Riley chuckled.

“Girl…” Dylan plopped on a bed with a deep exhale. “He was a full-on whore for months. I thought I’d have like ten nieces and nephews before it was over.”

She pulled me beside her and intertwined her fingers with mine. Unlike Riley, Dylan wasn’t a touchy person. I tried not to preen as she held my hand. “Where have you been?”

“Working, mostly.” Not a lie.