Page 18 of Crushing Clover

“Why are we here?”

“I thought it would be nice to stop for a while. You haven’t been to the beach here yet, have you?”

“I haven’t been to the beach since I was a kid.

” I laughed, thinking about the trips we’d taken to the beach on Lake Erie, not far from the group home where I’d met Noah.

We’d only been able to go occasionally because they were so short-staffed, but it was fun when we did.

The last time, Noah and I had gotten in trouble for sneaking off, which was fair, considering we’d been making out.

I smiled wistfully at the memory. I’d been so in love with him at one point. Now I’d probably never see him again.

I rolled my eyes at myself.

The boy I’d fallen in love with was as gone as the girl who’d done the falling. He’d cheated on me and planned to hide it. For years, I’d been his sugar mama, housekeeper, and itch scratcher. What he’d given me wasn’t love, no matter what I’d wanted to believe.

And now? He’d let me be sold to save his own skin.

That was the last time I’d let myself get nostalgic about that self-centered traitor.

Rush’s truck rolled to a stop. He shifted into park and shut off the engine, then came to help me out before I had even undone my seatbelt.

“I can get down on my own. Your truck isn’t that high.”

“It’s called being a gentleman.”

He put his hands on my waist to help me down—his expression saying he wouldn’t tolerate an argument. It felt like I should be wearing a poodle skirt and saddle shoes. Ridiculous. Why did they keep opening doors for me?

“If you were to compare notes with other gentlemen, I’m pretty sure a lot of the things the three of you do to me isn’t very gentlemanly.”

His roguish grin made my breath falter. “You say that as though you disapprove.”

I shrugged. “I don’t enjoy it. Saint won’t even let me have an orgasm.”

When he gave me a little tug, I slid off my seat and down his body. He didn’t let go until my feet were firmly on the ground. The bell on my collar jingled, the sound high and pretty.

“You don’t even get yourself off at night, when no one is watching?” he murmured close to my ear.

“No.”

“Not even when your secret admirer pays you a nocturnal visit?”

“Nope. He doesn’t bother making it good for me.”

“That bastard.” His lips quirked.

“That bastard.”

Did that mean that my nighttime visitor wasn’t Rush, or was he covering his tracks?

He took my hand and walked me down to the beach. The day had turned windy and cold, which had cleared out almost everyone who wasn’t here to surf. An expanse of sand stretched out before us, empty except for footprints. On hot days, this place had to be packed, but today it was almost a ghost town.

I shivered in my thin dress.

“Hold that thought.”

He jogged back to the truck and grabbed something from the backseat. When he came back, he handed me a hoodie. Going back to the truck had only taken a minute, but there was no way Saint John would have approved of him leaving me unsupervised in a public place the way he had.

“Not afraid I’ll run off?” I asked as I quickly pulled on the hoodie. It was a nice warm one, and the same blue as Rush’s eyes.

“Unlike Saint, I don’t think you’re going anywhere.”

“Because you trust me specifically, or because you’re a more trusting person?”

“A little of both, probably. Am I right to trust you?”

I let the hoodie’s sleeves dangle over my hands, enjoying the warmth. “I’m not going anywhere until someone makes me leave.”

“Even though you constantly have men pawing at you?”

“It isn’t exactly a new phenomenon in my life.”

Instead of that making him smile, he frowned. “You know, you do have a safeword. If you’re ever feeling overwhelmed and don’t want to fuck, you can say so.”

“It’s not so bad.” I shrugged. “Eventually, he might even let me have an orgasm.”

“A girl can dream.” He winked at me then brought me down to the water’s edge.

“I’ve never been to the ocean before.”

“Never? Damn. I probably should have let Lucky take you here first. I was surprised he hadn’t.”

I kicked off my shoes and picked them up. It was freeing to feel the sand between my toes, and the wind whipping tendrils of my hair.

“So, you don’t mind being stuck with us too much?”

“Things could be far worse,” I pointed out. When he frowned, I realized that wasn’t a compliment. “Besides, have you looked in the mirror? It’s not exactly a hardship.”

“Your flattery almost sounds sincere.” He chuckled.

“Don’t tell me you’re one of those guys who doesn’t know how hot he is.”

“With women constantly throwing themselves at my feet? I don’t think I’ve ever suffered from low self-esteem.”

“Having women constantly throwing themselves at your feet sounds inconvenient.”

“It’s an absolute tripping hazard.”

“Poor baby.” We smiled at each other, and warmth burbled in my stomach.

Dammit, Clover—you’re absolutely forbidden from developing a crush on any of these men. Not allowed.

Reluctantly, I pulled my gaze from his, looking out over the water.

A group of surfers chatted nearby, watching a couple of people who were still out on the water.

It was a mixed group of guys and girls, and they seemed happy to be there together, all of them laughing and possibly shit-talking each other, judging by the tone of their voices.

“Is that what life was like for you guys before you opened the restaurant?” I asked.

“Sometimes. Lucky has always been passionate about surfing. Saint and I only do it for fun.”

“Did Lucky surf competitively?”

“A bit. His father really encouraged it.”

“Yours didn’t?”

“My father wasn’t around. Neither was my mom, for that matter. She wasn’t super reliable, so I was mostly raised by my aunt and uncle, along with their kids. I spent most of my school years trying to get good grades so they didn’t regret taking me in.”

I grimaced. “That’s shitty. Kids shouldn’t have to excel to prove they’re worth care and attention.”

“You say that with a lot of authority.”

“One of my workers used to say that to us.”

“Workers?”

“Group home.”

“Man, you’ve got me beat. That’s even rougher than my life.”

“The last place wasn’t so bad. The workers did their best. My last foster home was terrible, though. It’s amazing what people will do to helpless kids when no one cares about them.”

He grimaced and flicked the bell on my collar. “People are the worst.”

“Some of them.”

We walked along, and I realized I felt more comfortable with him, knowing he hadn’t had a stellar childhood either. People who were raised in a regular environment didn’t get it.

We got too close to the water, and a wave rushed up, determined to swallow his boots.

“Who wears boots to the beach?” I teased.

“Men who aren’t expecting to go to the beach,” he said sourly, kicking wet sand off them. I was wet to the ankles now, so I assumed he had a decent-sized soaker.

“So, you landed yourself in trouble, and now you’re stuck with us.”

“Horror of horrors.”

His smile turned sharp. “Our tastes aren’t exactly conventional.”

“Neither are mine.”

I didn’t miss the flare of interest in his eyes, but he reined it in and changed the subject.

“What did you plan to do before you ended up here?”

A flock of seagulls decided we were getting too close, and they took to the air, squawking indignantly.

“I had good enough grades in school that I thought I might eventually do college or university, but then I moved out and bills have a way of changing your plans.”

He squeezed my hand.

“The sex resort I worked at was offering a scholarship, but then I got hurt.”

“Having sex?”

“It was a resort for men who like the rough stuff, so yeah. Job hazard.”

“But you went anyway.”

“It’s hard to turn down hope.”

He nodded like he understood. “What had you planned to go into?”

“I’d always said I wanted to go into medicine, but who am I kidding?

My marks were good, but I don’t want it bad enough to slog through that much more schooling—but living paycheck to paycheck was hell, and I never want to do it again.

What I really wanted was stability—a decent paying job, a shitty house to work on, and someone I could build a life with. ”

God, I sounded so boring.

“Didn’t your boyfriend help?”

“I was the only one pulling that plow. He was just along for the ride.”

He snorted. “So, you left his sorry ass?”

“He cheated on me first.”

His whistle was whisked away by the wind.

“Pathetic, right? I don’t understand how he could think he loved me but not care enough to help out.”

“He prioritized entertaining himself over you, and he had no reason to change his ways. You sacrificed everything for him, and he let you.”

I sighed. “I was always so worried about choosing a field where I could make good money, and now I’ll never make any again.”

“Your relationship with us might not be exactly what you planned on, but at least you know where things stand. You give us what we want, and you get what you need in return.” He shrugged. “If there are things you want, ask.”

“To be honest, I thought this was going to be awful, but I’d rather do this than shake my ass all month and find out he went behind my back and spent our food money on a new game or something.”

“He really did that?”

“More than once. Thank fuck for soup kitchens.”

We went back to the truck as the wind picked up, whipping our hair around as though it were an Olympic sport. My legs and feet were chilled. I was glad the hoodie almost reached my knees.

“It’s pretty here when it’s not freezing. Maybe it wasn’t the best day to show you.”

“It’s still pretty. Thank you for bringing me.”

He helped me back into the truck and started it, cranking the heat to high and turning on my seat heater. I hadn’t realized my teeth were chattering until then.

“I hope I didn’t give you frostbite.”

“Even if I lose a few fingers, it won’t interfere with my household tasks,” I said dryly.

“Damaging a communal possession is sacrilege.”

“Possession?” I arched a brow.

“Don’t you like being our little toy?”