Page 13 of Craved By You (Dark Desires Duet #1)
Astrid
T onight’s concert was even better than the last. Colt dedicated one of his songs to me, and the women in the audience all swooned. Secretly, they were probably imagining that they were in my shoes as he serenaded everyone.
Haileigh seemed to have a good time as well.
Chris and Ryder both made sure that she didn’t have a chance to think about Braden leaving.
If I hadn’t known any better, I would have said that both of them had developed a crush on her.
Part of me genuinely wanted to see that work out.
After everything she had been through, Haileigh deserved everything in the entire universe and those guys would be perfect for her.
Is it strange that I’m hoping my best friend ends up in a throuple?
One thing stuck out to me, though. At dinner, Colt started asking me about the scars he noticed on my body, wanting to know what happened.
It wasn’t necessarily dinner conversation, nor was I ecstatic to explain to him that they were scars from either dragging safety pins and razors across my skin or burning myself with lighters.
I did point out one scar that had been left on me by a guy at a bar where I worked at one time.
That night, after I refused to go home with him, he got pissed and put his cigarette out on my wrist. I was pretty sure that by his reaction, even though the incident had happened years ago, Colt still wanted the person’s information so he could take him out.
The thought of having someone in my life who was that protective of me was going to take some time getting used to. In the past, I needed someone to protect me from my own partners. I could only imagine how he would react if he were to ever hurt me in a way that I didn’t want.
As soon as the car came to a stop at The Shack, Colt took my hand into his. “I had an idea during the concert and I can’t shake it.” He paused and bit his lip while continuing to stare straight ahead. “When we get inside, I need you to wait in the lounge area while I get everything ready.”
Feeling slightly confused, I still mustered up a nod. What could he be up to? I wondered, but knew he would never tell me no matter how much I begged.That didn’t mean I wasn’t tempted to test that out, though.
Colt turned off the car just as it started sprinkling, and by the time we got to the door the skies had let loose and the rain was tap-dancing off the metal building. I loved the way it sounded from inside the warehouse, not to mention the fact that I just love storms in general.
“ Can I get you something to drink?” Colt asked. An unprompted shiver trailed across my body, giving me goosebumps. Even without an actual response, he began brewing a cup of coffee and brought it over to me a couple of minutes later.
We sat in the quiet for a few minutes while I sipped on the brew. Silence was a welcomed aftermath from the excitement of the concert and the loudness of the speakers. Yet, it was still a fragile peace that my restless thoughts threatened to shatter.
What were we going to do now?
Colt’s gaze pierced through the air, as if he could hear the unspoken questions swirling inside me. “Trust me?” he asked, his voice low.
The lack of a demand, and the sheer vulnerability of the question, resonated deeply. “I’m working on it,” I breathed, knowing full well that I had trusted him since the start of our relationship, since he first asked me about the stoplight safe word.
“ That’s all I ask,” he assured me as he stood up slowly, and began to head down the dark hall. “Now, be a good girl and stay.”
Stay.
That word should have made me feel like I was being treated more like a pet than a girlfriend.
I was still in shock that we had moved into the roles of boyfriend and girlfriend so quickly in the beginning, but it all felt so natural and perfect.
Hearing him tell me to be a good girl though did something to me, and I had yet to understand exactly what.
I scrolled on my phone, making some much needed updates to my social media.
I hadn’t gotten around to sharing photos I had taken at the concert and I needed to update my relationship status.
I couldn’t wait for those who chose to remain my friends on social media to get a good look at how life was going now, instead of praying for my downfall.
I would never understand why people who made fun of me in high school had a sudden change of heart and thought they wanted to be online besties years later.
People change , is what Haileigh would probably say, but I still had doubt burrowing into the back of my mind.
Colt’s voice broke through the trail of thoughts that was taking me down the rabbit hole.
“Ready, sunshine?” He held out his hand and grasped mine to help me back to my feet.
Once I was standing he spun me around so I was looking away from him and placed a cloth over my eyes so that he could lead me to his big surprise.
“ Where are you taking me?” I had my suspicions, but I enjoyed pretending there was a lingering mystery as he guided me around the building.
His deep chuckle billowed around me. “You’ll see, in just…” He paused and I could feel him untying the blindfold. “One moment.” He pulled the blindfold away from my eyes, and in the room, I was surrounded by candlelight. The shadows they created were seductively dancing along the wall.
On the table, a collection of items lay ominously: various ropes, crops, floggers, canes, a rubber mallet, what looked like meat claws, and a pair of scissors.
“What is all of this?” I inquired, my excitement and eagerness growing.
This setup would probably scare most people away, not me.
Surface level, I looked unsure, but deep down, I felt a desire building within.
If it were anyone else, I would have already turned and run for the door.
But with Colt? I couldn’t wait to explore this life with him.
“ You told me your ex had found your profile and forced some of this stuff on you.” Colt took a deep breath and for a brief moment, I could see the candlelight reflecting the hesitation in his eyes.
“I know all of this feels fast, but if you’re willing, I would love to show you this world…
my world , where the darkness can become the light. ”
He took me by the hand and caressed my cheek with the other. “I’ve seen your scars. I knew about your self-harm before even inquiring about it,” he started to plead. “Let all of this become your release. Let me help you in a more controlled aspect.”
Colt took my face into his hands and leaned in to kiss me.
No one had ever made me feel this way. It was scary, unknown, and yet so freeing.
To have someone who cared so deeply that they wanted to show me how I could heal through the things that once caused me pain.
Part of me felt like I was crazy. That I should be turning and running in the opposite direction while my intuition told me to stay, that I was safe.
After what probably felt like an eternity to him, I finally mustered the courage to admit it. “I-I trust you.” For just a moment I watched as a light that I hadn’t seen before glimmered through Colt’s eyes.
“ Thank you, sunshine. I promise I won’t let you down.” He pulled me into him squeezing tight as if to never let me go and kissed me gently on my forehead.
My eyes made their way back over to the table where the implements were still sitting there, patiently waiting for us to figure out which was going to be used tonight.
I had seen all of these items online; impact play had always drawn me in.
The marks they left across bare skin was art.
I picked up the claws that one would normally use for pulling and shredding meat. “What’s this for?”
Colt smiled and took them from me, gripping one in each hand and motioned for me to turn around.
Gently he ran the claws down my back and demonstrated various ways that they could be used, starting with scratching and clawing motions and then jabbing motions, all while ensuring that he was maintaining a lighter pressure than what he would use if we were engaged in a session.
“See, scratching without negative intent, you’d get the same kind of release only along with a surge of endorphins. ”
“ I would have never guessed.” I took the claws from his hands and took a mental note. These would probably be one of my favorites one day.