Page 23 of Conail (Members From Money Season 2, #150)

She arrived at the cabin before him and kept asking herself why she had agreed to the meet. He had ignored her for a week, seven days where she had been in hell. She should get over him, she decided. But it was not that easy.

She had humiliated herself a dozen times already.

Almost groveling. He just would not forgive her.

She had to live with that. But how it hurt!

She was barely sleeping, and her work was suffering.

She was a strong, independent black woman who had been to law school and aced all the courses.

She had come fifth in her class and had been killing it in Chicago.

She did not need some arrogant farmer who was stringing her along.

She would tell him that. Where the hell was he?

Dragging up the collar of her jacket, she tapped her foot impatiently on the cobbled stone driveway.

It was cold and the place looked creepy with the snow clinging to leafless trees.

It was eerily silent and still as a tomb.

She was about to jump back in the car when headlights speared through the darkness.

He parked behind her, and she watched him alight from the vehicle and come towards her.

Her heart ached as she stared at him. He was wearing the traditional faded denims and flannel.

God, the man looked good in flannel, she thought in despair.

His jacket was open all the way as if the cold did not affect him.

His hair was disheveled -- the twists and curls that suited his narrow face.

Lifting her chin, she ignored the tremors and the pounding of her heart as he came nearer.

"Sorry, an emergency at the farm." He flicked a gaze over her and smiled. "You could have gone in. The door's never locked."

"Let's go in now. I'm freezing." Turning away, she marched towards the cabin.

Okay, she was going to make him crawl, he mused. Well, so be it. He followed behind her and admired the view.

Slamming the door shut at their backs, he headed towards the fireplace to get a fire going. Within minutes, the rosy glow lit up the area and there was no need to turn on the lamp.

"Well?" She folded her arms and stood by the worn sofa. "What is it?"

"Will you sit?"

"I prefer to stand."

"Dammit Maddy. I need to get some things off my chest, and I would prefer us sitting."

"Too bad. We don't always get what we want. You've shown me that repeatedly."

"Okay, fine." Her breath whooshed out as he crossed to her and dragged her towards the sofa, holding her effortlessly as she struggled to free herself.

"Let me go."

"No." She was on his lap and her squirming was costing him dearly. "Stop." He broke off with a groan as her shapely derriere rubbed against his crotch.

She felt the evidence of his arousal and went very still, eyes flying to his face.

"I'm not having sex with you."

"I didn't come here for sex. At least not initially.

" He bowed his forehead to hers and inhaled.

"I came here to talk. To vent -- say what's on my mind.

" He held her against him and inhaled her scent.

Lifting his head, he stared at her. "I've never loved anyone except you.

" The admission was torn from him and had her heart turning over.

"You alone have the power to rip me to pieces, and you did.

" He shook his head as she opened her mouth.

"I'm not going to rehash the past; I'm just stating a fact.

When you left, I swore I would never give anyone that power over me again.

It broke me and I could not function." He closed his eyes briefly and struggled with the pain.

"I love you. Always will. You're the beginning and the ending for me.

I wanted to punish you for leaving me, but I ended up punishing myself. "

Her heart simply melted, and the anger drained from her. Framing his face between her palms, she blinked at the tears.

"I will spend the rest of my life trying to make up for what I did to you.

I love you Colin, so much that it hurts.

I have never loved anyone but you. I thought I wanted the big city -- thought that making a lot of money and going to fancy restaurants and galleries was what I wanted.

When all along, the only thing I wanted was you.

" She leaned into him. "I love you, please believe me. I want you to believe me."

"I do." He tilted her chin up. "Baby--" He brushed his lips on hers slowly, feeling the tremors. Back and forth, back and forth, until they were both shaking with need.

"I want you in my life." His tongue teased the full bottom lip.

"For always." He nibbled at the skin and sent her blood racing.

"I was a fool." He peppered her face with kisses, inhaling her scent until he was going mad with desire.

"I spent the last week in agony." He came back to her lips and sipped from them.

She opened her mouth, her hands going around his neck.

"Colin."

Her voice was whisper soft against his lips.

"Love me."

"I do." It had to be now. With a groan, he swept her in his arms. Grabbing the throw, he spread it in front of the fire and laid her down gently. "I was prepared to grovel." He told her as he stripped off her sweater.

"No."

"To go down on my knees." The firelight played over her smooth skin. "To do anything." He passed his hands over her small breasts. "Let me have you."

"Yes." She reached for him and very soon was lost in his masculine scent.

*****

He was not going to force her. He could and had been prepared to do just that, but the doctors advised against stressful situations, and she insisted she wanted to go home. "No offense to your mother, but I am yearning for the farm."

He had not suggested that she come home with him.

That would have made it too personal as if he was inviting her to come and live with him.

Which wasn't the case. He simply wanted to look out for his investment.

But he had insisted on picking her up from the hospital.

Now he was having a damn difficult time not touching her.

He wanted to touch her. Christ, when had all of this happened?

"The doctors said complete rest."

"I was there, remember?"

Jesus! The woman was cantankerous.

"No lifting of farm implements."

She simply turned her head to glare at him.

She had had to tamp down the acute awareness of him.

For the past few days, her nights had been plagued with dreams about him.

That would not do. She would be a fool to even think about going there.

He only thought of her as an employee who happened to be carrying his seed.

She had also started to feel the baby and it was a baby as far as she was concerned.

He or she was moving, tiny movements, whisper soft, but she felt it against her palms. She had also started talking to him.

Which should not be. She could not become attached.

But how could she not? He was inside her body, growing and making limbs and other features.

She wondered who he was going to look like and had started exploring names.

She could not say it to anyone, not even her mother, because the baby was not hers and that was depressing her.

She wished she could slow down the months, but the days seemed to be flying at the speed of light.

She was almost five months gone already.

Closing her eyes, she pretended to sleep and tried to block the acute awareness of him from her mind.

Conail eased the pressure off his fingers as he slowly relaxed them on the steering wheel.

He was driving slowly because of the slickly wet road.

The weather had dumped five inches of snow which had quickly turned to ice.

He was aware of her. Her faint perfume, the fact that she was now starting to show.

That had given him a jolt when he arrived at the hospital to see her dressed in black leggings and an oversized sweater.

Her pregnancy was pronounced and that made it real.

He was no longer thinking about an abortion. He wanted the baby desperately. But more than that, he wanted her. He could not be in the same space with her, without wanting to touch. Stealing a glance at her, he let his eyes roam over her face and linger on her lips.

Dragging his eyes away, he concentrated on the road, fiercely. This was ridiculous. It was crazy. He would be all sorts of fool to get involved with her. He had been burned badly before, and it should teach him a lesson. Women could not be trusted. He didn't even know her.

It was best to leave well enough alone, he decided as he came to a stop inside the driveway of the farm.

He took in the surroundings and realized to his surprise that it was the first time he had been here.

He knew his mother visited often. It was a wide spread of land, with snow capping the trees and making the grounds glisten.

When she stirred, he pushed open the door and went around to open hers.

Taking her hand in his, he helped her out, his touch unconsciously gentle.

"Watch your step." His arm went around her waist and for a few seconds she was pressed against him. Stepping back, he took her hand in his, the touch impersonal.

"I can manage." She murmured huskily, damned if she would allow him to see how shaken she was by his touch. She just needed to get inside and away from him.

"Just--" his voice petered off when the front door was flung open and her mother came rushing towards them.

"Honey!" Leaving the two of them to be reunited, he went to get her small case from the back seat and went to put it on the porch.

"Thank you Conail." Maeve beamed at him as he came bounding back down the steps.

"Of course." His eyes went to Yasmine and lingered. "Er -- please see to it that she rests."

"I will." Maeve promised. "Would you like to come in for a cup of hot chocolate?"

"I'm sure he has to be on his way."