Page 19 of Conail (Members From Money Season 2, #150)

He left quickly and quietly, telling himself that he was not a coward. He was just being cautious. He also convinced himself that he had not been with a woman in weeks, hence the natural reaction to her.

He was a male after all, and she was a female. Not that he was attracted to every Jane and Molly that came along. He was discriminating and chose his partners carefully. Especially after the fiasco that had upended his life in the past.

And she was carrying his seed.

All those arguments crowded inside his head as he made the drive back to his place in the early hours of the morning.

Snow glistened on buildings and sidewalks, turning everything into a pristine white that was appealing to the eyes.

Traffic was light due to the holidays and within half an hour, he was back at his apartment.

He had intended to spend Christmas at the club, just to relax and unwind. The corporate office was closed until January sixth, but that did not mean he did not have business to attend to. A trip to China was on the books and a crossover to Italy where he was going to check on his vineyard.

Letting himself into the apartment, he headed straight to the bedroom and stripped off his clothing. He had been on his way to the opera when his mother called. He should have told her he was busy.

Stepping under the multiple jets, he closed his eyes and tried to force the image from his brain. The sight of her bare thighs when he rubbed the cramps away, the feel of her skin, satiny soft... His eyes snapped open as he felt his flesh swelling and his blood getting hot.

Turning off the sprays, he dragged restless fingers through his wet hair. He needed coffee, that was it. The caffeine would fix things inside him.

Stepping out of the shower, he grabbed a towel and chanced a look down. He was fully aroused. Swearing viciously, he toweled himself off and went into the bedroom.

He should call up someone. Margo. No. She was pissed at him for his casual disregard for her feelings. She wanted more and he could not afford to ignore the fact that that was where her mind was headed.

Opening drawers, he dragged out a pair of ancient sweats. He would fix himself a pot of coffee and work on the contract he needed to take with him. Then he would make some calls. Probably wake up his damn assistant to deal with some paperwork.

He paid the man an exorbitant amount to be at his beck and call. Not that he minded, Conail conceded grudgingly. Jerome was loyal and committed.

Pulling the t-shirt over his head, he also remembered that he had given him and his partner the use of the pied a' terre in Paris. For a week.

Making his way downstairs, he stood there inside the pristine and spotless kitchen. His housekeeper had also been given the time off, but the woman had cooked a mountain of food as if she expected him to starve for the week she would be gone. And she had labeled everything.

There was food for breakfast, lunch and dinner, even though he had specifically told her he would be more out than in.

Shaking his head, he heaped the coffee inside the filter. Very soon, the potent scent had him almost whimpering in relief. Standing by the counter, he waited impatiently for it to brew and poured a large amount into the cup.

Taking it with him, he headed to his office on the first floor. What he needed was work, he decided. But first...

Sitting behind the desk, he took several sips before reaching for the phone. She would be up now, and it was only fitting that he should check on her.

"Mother."

"Darling, I was hoping you would have stayed for breakfast."

"I had something to do." He took several more sips and floundered. "Er -- I was just wondering -- Is she awake?"

"Yes. She's feeling so much better. I'm preparing her something light. Would you like to speak to her?"

He felt a jolt straight to his heart and tamped it down ruthlessly. "Why would I want to do that? I'm just making sure she's okay. Well--" he searched for something else to say. "I'll be in touch."

"Darling, why don't you come over for dinner?"

"I have plans." It alarmed him that he was tempted. Sorely tempted to say yes. "Which were interrupted when you called me to come over last night."

There was a pause, and he felt the guilt cramping his chest.

"If you change your mind, we would love to have you."

He hung up without responding. He wouldn't change his mind of course. The best thing to do was to keep things at a professional level. Go back to getting reports.

The image of her on her knees retching would vanish with time. She was not his responsibility. If his mother wanted to take on the role of supporter, then that was her problem. He wanted nothing more to do with the situation.

Last night was a fluke, a normal reaction for a red-blooded man with a healthy sex drive. She was a very attractive woman, and he had been in close contact with her.

It was just that simple. No need to overthink anything. It could have happened to anyone. They had shared an emotional and highly charged moment, and he had reacted to it.

With a nod of satisfaction at the justification, he felt the tension around his chest easing. She was not his type anyway.

With that settled, he reached for the contract. Work was his panacea; it would help him to keep things straight. He had no business thinking about her anyway. So, it was settled.

*****

"When are you going to tell your parents about us?" Maddy was trying desperately to play it cool and not allow the frustration to seep through, but it was getting harder.

After that first fateful night at the cabin, she had foolishly thought that things had changed between them, that he was giving her a second chance. But aside from stealing away from the farm to meet at the cabin, he refused to discuss anything else.

They did not talk much. As soon as they came together, passion would take over and rule them. She adored the fire, the feel of his callused hands on her skin, but she wanted more. She wanted a commitment. One he was reluctant to offer.

"I need time." He responded evasively. After a very strenuous bout of lovemaking which had left them both gasping for air and shaken to the core, they were lying on the rumpled sheets as they tried to get their breaths back.

He had no idea where his parents thought he was going every night, because they never asked. He was at the farm bright and early to perform his many and varied tasks and wouldn't leave until everything was taken care of.

The winter had stalled the outdoors activities, but the greenhouse was coming along nicely.

Pushing his hands away, she started to climb off the bed when he grabbed her. "What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing." She told him airily, eyes flashing. "What are we doing here Colin?"

"Want me to show you?" he leered at her, sighing when she continued to glare at him. "Please don't spoil it."

"You want me to keep my mouth shut, is that it? Be grateful for the fact that you're with me." She was damned if she would cry in front of him, even though her heart was breaking. "I love you--"

"You said that before and then you left. I'm sure you also said it to the bastard you were with in Chicago."

She stared at him dry eyed, her heart breaking into pieces. "I didn't." She told him quietly. "I made a mistake, but you're never going to let me forget it, are you?"

"You broke my goddamn heart!" Letting go of her, he pulled himself up on the pillows. "You broke my heart, and I cannot move past the fact that you left." His hands were clenched into fists. "This is as far as I can go right now. I need time." He hissed out a breath.

"How much?"

"What?" He swung his gaze towards her and felt his heart doing a dive at the sight of her. She was naked and rumpled. Her hair was a mess, made by his restless fingers.

Her lips were swollen from the savage way he had kissed her. He had left marks on her delicate skin and fed on her nipples like a man starving. She was addictive, had always been and it scared the crap out of him.

"How much time?"

He felt disoriented and aroused. He wanted her more than he wanted to live.

"I don't know."

She swung her legs off the bed and rose before he could move to stop her.

"Where are you going?"

"When you decide what to do about us, you know where to find me." She looked around for her clothes and had to fight almost physically not to allow her emotions to take over.

"It's late," he began foolishly.

"I'm leaving. But you can stay."

He caught her at the door, hands pinning her there. "Please don't go."

"I cannot stay!" She shoved at him, the feel of his flesh, making her weak. Tears clouded her eyes. "I cannot go on like this and we're going to end up resenting each other. I want more and I--" She shook her head and pursed her lips. "I want more."

They stood there suspended in silence for what seemed like forever. The cabin was isolated, and the thick winter snow covered everything. The fire he had kindled was already dying down, but the warmth made the plain log building cozy and intimate.

She could feel his body heat and the scent of his subtle cologne. His body was hard and lean from years of manual labor and she ached to feel him wrapped around her again. But he was giving her just that -- a hard willing body when she wanted his heart.

She was dying to hear those words that he had whispered so long ago. Words of commitment for the future. Without them, she wanted to die.

"Give me time." He whispered and gathered her close. "I need to think things through. But I want you so much. Don't leave."

She should go. Just shove at him and leave. But instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck and let him carry her back to the well-used bed, knowing she would regret it in the morning.

*****

Instead of getting better, she got worse and as soon as she hit the second trimester, had to be rushed to the hospital. Her blood pressure was sky high, and her feet were swelling.