Page 52 of Climbing Everest

Everest

M y blood feels like it’s on fire, my eyes burn from the tears I’m doing my best to keep at bay…

And my damn heart aches.

I wasn’t blowing smoke when I said I would have understood earlier on, but the fact they not only continued to hide from me the fact they removed my implant but continuously raw dogged me as though they really were trying to impregnate me is what is pissing me off and shattering my heart.

I finally thought I could trust someone again, I finally started to feel like myself again. Now that’s all blown to bits. Nothing more than smoke in the wind.

At first, I’m not sure where I’m going. To be honest, I really didn’t think the guards would move out of the way or open the gate. I was more than prepared to slam into that fucking thing.

I’d been wearing my seatbelt. So, at worst, I might have gotten a bruise from the belt and maybe a little bit of a burn from the air bags being as I was going forty miles an hour by the time I made it to the end of the driveway.

Kato’s fancy as fuck car would have been smashed. That would have at least given me a bit of satisfaction, fleeting as it might have been.

Where the hell am I going? I don’t have anyone other than my guys and Flora, and I’m not too sure Roman would be super happy about me showing up to the Pakhan’s house unannounced while driving the vehicle of a professional rival.

I can’t help but snort to myself at that phrasing. To be professional rivals would mean they would have to have some form of boundaries. And Kato – as well as Brix and Madd – just proved to me they have zero boundaries, especially when it comes to my bodily autonomy.

Just like when I was growing up and being groomed to be married to the man of my father’s choosing, just like the men who tossed money at me on stage, just like the men who would get a little too rough when they paid for my body.

It really shouldn’t surprise me – they’re mafia. Criminals. I’ve tried my whole life to pretend they’re not as sick as my father, but…aren’t they?

Before they knew the truth, without bothering to actually have an intelligent conversation with me, they decided how the rest of my life would look without a single word of input from me.

Because I’m a woman. I’m nothing more than tits and a pussy. I’m nothing more than a vessel for the heir of the next in the Antoniou line, just like every other woman in this criminal world of ours.

At least if I’d been born into a normal family, the kind who doesn’t sell drugs, weapons, or sex, I might have been treated like a human fucking being.

No matter how hard I fight them, the tears refuse to be held back and stream down my cheeks. My nose is running, and I highly doubt Kato keeps tissues – or a glove box full of napkins – in his car.

Turning onto a main roadway, I merge into traffic, still driving aimlessly while contemplating calling Flora. I need to keep from speeding considering that my ID is a fake, something Kato had forged for me. I haven’t had an active driver’s license since it expired two years ago.

Who am I kidding? Even if I got pulled over, I’m sure one Family or another have the cops in their pocket. They might very well call Kato to tell him exactly where I am.

I lift my chin and look in the mirror, turning my head one way then the other as I wonder where they inserted the tracker. Behind my ear? In my neck?

My luck, it’s somewhere I won’t be able to find, thus I won’t be able to remove.

As traffic becomes a little congested and I’m forced to slow to a near stop, I drop my head against the rest and grab my phone from inside my bag.

After hitting Flora’s number, I put my phone on speaker and set it on my lap.

“What’s up?” she answers after three rings.

“You busy?” I ask, fighting to keep the emotion out of my voice.

She’s quiet a few beats then says, “What happened? And who am I killing?”

I huff a watery laugh. “No killing. Not yet anyway. Meet me for drinks? And maybe pay for them since I don’t currently have a single penny on me.”

Yeah. The guys are all about supporting me and have yet to actually give my cash to me, yet I have zero access to any accounts, no credit cards, not even a checkbook.

Although I’m pretty sure there isn’t a bar in the state – or country – who would accept a check for some booze.

“Place and time,” she says.

“Now and wherever.”

“Salty’s?” she offers.

I frown at the cross street as I pass by and tell her, “I can be there in ten minutes.”

“Twenty for me. See you there. You need me to see if Daddy has anyone in the area to keep an eye on you until I get there?”

Not that she can protect me but where Flora goes, her sinfully sexy guards go. She’s had the same guards for years, one of them since we were around ten, making him somewhere in his thirties or even forties.

She can deny it all she wants, but I’m pretty sure Flora has been crushing on at least one of the two for years. Hell, knowing her, she might have already slept with one of them. My girl refuses to deny herself anything, and that includes pleasure.

“I’m fine. Doubt anyone will be looking for me at Salty’s. Hell, I doubt anyone thinks I would leave the estate after our little announcement.”

Damn. Had that been just last night?

Maybe this isn’t a good idea. All it would take is one person to spot me and alert my father.

“Any chance you heard anything about last night from your dad?”

“Right. Because Daddy has always been super forthcoming about his business with me. Or, you know, anyone outside his tight circle.” She’s quiet for another moment, then, “I’m putting out a call. You’re nervous.”

Yeah. I am, but I don’t want to admit that to her and I really don’t appreciate being made to feel this fucking fear after taking care of myself for so long.

“I’ll be fine. I’ll watch for you. Text me when you’re heading out,” I say as I find an open spot less than a block away from the entrance to the bar and carefully parallel park Kato’s car.

He would shit a full wall of bricks if he found out I’m parking his car along the curb where anyone could easily scratch the shiny paint, or even ding the vehicle.

“Already on my way. See you in fifteen.”

Damn. My girl must have jumped in the car the second I asked her to come out.

“Heading inside now. See you when you get here.”

I end the call and grab the key fob before turning to watch for traffic then push the car door open.

Kato’s lucky I bother locking the fucking doors and setting the alarm with the level of anger scorching my nervous system.

Curling my shoulders forward against the cold breeze blowing right through the tiny holes of my sweater, I keep my head down, letting my long, inky dark hair act as a curtain and shield against anyone who might look in my direction.

Probably should have grabbed a jacket, but all I cared about when I left was getting the fuck away from the only three men on this planet who hold the ability to crush my heart.

And have done a pretty good fucking job of it.

As I pull the door open, blinking as I go from the bright afternoon sun to the dimly lit bar, my ears vaguely register the rumbling purr of an approaching motorcycle and if I’m not mistaken, I’m pretty sure I know exactly who’s on it.

Of course, Madd found me. Because there’s a fucking tracker somewhere on my body.

Does that mean Brix and Kato are behind him?

If they think for one fucking second they can force me back to the house, they’re not only going to end up with bruises and maybe even a few bite marks, but I’ll make the biggest scene possible.

I’ll make sure everyone inside and outside the bar knows what’s going on.

They might hold a lot of power, but surely the cops showing up isn’t on their wish list for the day.

Instead of waiting to see what he’ll do, I let the door swing shut behind me and find a table near the back where I can watch the door, but far enough to not be seen immediately if – when – Madd comes barreling through the door.

Flora and her guards will be here soon. And the thing is, I’m not worried about her guards and Maddox facing off.

Nope. It’s Flora who will go all psycho banshee on him if he tries to muscle me out of the bar or even talk to me when it’s obvious I need time away from him and the other two.

Not three minutes later, the door opens and Madd’s broad form fills the space, his body backlit, casting his face in shadows.

Weird thing, though, is that I can feel the moment his eyes find me even if I can’t see them. It’s like his attention is palpable, like some kind of beam locking onto me.

Though I can’t see his eyes, I still refuse to turn my attention away.

He shocks the shit out of me when he takes a seat at a table closer to the door, his body positioned so he can see me, the entire inside of Salty’s and the front door.

He’s prepared to act as my guard, a sentry.

He’ll watch over me, watch out for me, even if I have no interest in speaking to him right now.

A waitress approaches and I order two lemon drop shots and two glasses of Merlot before realizing I have no idea whether Flora’s drink choices have changed. “You know what? I’ll just wait until my friend gets here. She might not want wine,” I say.

And really, I don’t have money or a card to give her to open a tab. Sure, I can easily go demand one or the other from Madd but that would involve actually speaking to him.

Not now. Maybe not today at all.

The tenuous trust I’d begun to feel for my husbands feels as though it’s unraveling strand by strand.

And…I kind of hate them for it. For once, I wanted to feel as though I meant something to someone, meant something more than what my existence could bring them.

Even if the decision was made before they knew the truth, they’ve had plenty of time to tell me the truth and make an appointment with an OB-GYN. Or, you know, wear a rubber when they fucked me.