Page 10 of Clean Hack

Why would I even bother wasting energy thinking about it?

Baking soda had so many uses. Also known as Sodium Bicarbonate. I wasn’t a baker, so I never used it for that. I also didn’t get heartburn, but I had read somewhere that it helped with that. You could also use it to clean mouth guards and retainers, probably even dentures, too. Just a little in some hot water, soak, and then rinse. Then your disgusting mouthpiece was ready to be used again. All those products people use on their hair and cheap shampoos, they tend to leave a greasy residue over a period of time. Little baking soda rinse clears that all away. Again, not something I really needed because while I did have a little bit of hair, I didn’t really care about things like that.

It was also good for deodorizing shit too. I’d heard of people putting a box in the back of their refrigerator and freezer. I had no clue if it worked because I usually didn’t have much in mine to get smelly. Got a clogged drain? Pack it with some baking soda. Then boil a mixture of half water and half vinegar, and pour that puppy down the drain. With a little volcano magic, the drain would be like new again. Sort of. It worked for minor clogs and slow drains. That I had used before.

But what it was really great for, was cleaning. Anything from kitchen counters to the soap scum on your tub.

And then there was the cleaning up of blood. Did it take it away completely, well no, and that was why bleach was made. But it did absorb quite nicely, making the big messes a little easier to clean up. It also kept the blood from running everywhere and making an even bigger mess. Plus it helped to cut through the iron smell, though at this point it didn’t even register to me much anymore.

Clearly, I wasn’t a very exciting person. Could you imagine me on a date? Yeah, don’t.

With the body bagged up tightly, in many pieces mind you, it made it easier to move and disperse. Or in this case, feed to pigs because that was where this guy was headed. I knew a man not far from here with a pig farm and he loved it when his pigs were happy. He didn’t even ask what I brought them or cared what time I did it. Another two hours and I’d be back here getting paid. Then it was a long drive to one of my properties, whichever one I chose to head to. I wasn’t quite sure. But I would tell you this, I hated motels and hotels. I would always make sure I made it to my own bed, one of them, come hell or high water. I wasn’t a germaphobe, but those places were just absolutely filthy. They never knew how to use bleach properly. It wasn’t just the sheets either.