Page 18 of Christmas with Brother's Best Friends

I’ve never had to fight against myself this way to keep my arousal in check. . There are peopleeverywherearound us.

“No,” I finally say, my voice coming out strangled.

Emma smiles to herself. “You’re supposed to be relaxing. You work way too much and way too hard. You’re like the Energizer bunny.”

I breathe in slowly through my nose as I watch a few people skating, trying to take my mind off of the weight of her legs on mine. “It’s just… if I’m not working, I don’t know who I am.”

The words come out more honest than I meant. But Emma doesn’t mock me. She just nods, like she gets it.

“You’re going to burn yourself out, and you’ll be no help to anyone,” Emma replies before sighing. “I guess I should take my own advice.”

My eyes move over to hers as she lowers her tablet to rest on her lap. “We won’t leave late tonight then.”

Emma nods in agreement. “And you won’t come to work at five in the morning.”

Part of me wants to argue because I’m most productive in the morning, but she’s right. I won’t be any help if I burn myself out in the middle of this project.

“Okay,” I say as I rest my hand just below her knee, unable to resist myself. Unable to resist the feel of her against my palm.

“Okay,” Emma replies with a satisfied look. She pulls her legs off me and scoots closer until our bodies are nearly pressing together. The heat radiating between us is enough to fry my brain, but it seems completely one sided. She doesn’t seem phased at all, even though I’m affected enough to will an erection away just from the brush of her legs. She shows me the screen of her tablet where there’s a rough sketch of me gazing out at the rink.

Of course it’s good. Even her quick sketches feel like they’re pulled from some inner place only she can see.

But what guts me is that she chosemeas her subject. In the middle of the chaos, she paused andsawme.

“You were meant to do this,” I say quietly, the words pulling themselves out of my chest. “You see people in a way the rest of us don’t. You should hold onto that.”

Emma’s eyes flick up to mine, soft and startled. And then—briefly, unmistakably—they dip to my mouth.

I freeze.

One lean forward and I could have her lips. One touch and this thing between us would explode.

But behind her face, I see Ethan’s. Andrew’s. The years we spent earning each other’s trust.

I clench my jaw and look away.

“We should get back,” I manage, voice tight. “Before they think I went rogue.”

Emma’s smile falters for half a second. Then she nods and powers down the tablet. “Yeah. Okay.”

I down the rest of my hot chocolate like it’ll douse the fire she lit inside me, toss the cup in a trash can, and follow her back down the sidewalk.

I got out of the office. I relaxed. I even smiled.

But there’s no unwinding when the one person who makes you feel most alive… is the one you can’t have.

Chapter nine

Chapter Nine: Ryan

Alternative rock music fills my ears as I walk down the sidewalk toward the office with my earbuds in, all other noises being shut out. How I usually like to start my mornings.

The cold wind bites at my nose and ears as it blows against me, but I trudge on, adjusting the collar of my coat to protect my neck more. I’m borderline miserable from the winter until my eyes land on Emma as she heads down the sidewalk from the other end, her red hair dancing in the wind.

We’re due for a marketing strategy meeting in fifteen minutes, and the days when we’re scheduled for meetings together are my favorite work days. We only have so many of them left.

It weighs me down more than I could’ve ever expected. She’s so damn smart and creative, and that pushes me to be better. To think more openly. To take risks.