Page 18

Erica

“You moved away from the window, then?” Erica said, walking into the lounge to find Alex fixing himself a drink.

“Well, I wasn’t going to stand and watch another man paw at you—”

“You mean hug me?”

“And so, to stop myself from doing something stupid,” Alex said, speaking a little louder as he ignored her. “I came down here.”

“So what you’re saying is all that time apart taught you nothing. You still don’t trust me.”

“You spent all that time apart with him.”

Erica bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself smirking at the way the veins in his neck popped the more irritated he became.

“What’s your point?”

“My point is, Erica, you can’t be angry at me for thinking something is going on when you’re spending more time with him than you are with me! Even before you shacked up together for three fucking days, you were constantly texting and calling—”

“He’s my business partner!” She said, scoffing at his insecurities.

“You told me you were just helping him out, now you’re business partners? Come on , Erica. Do you not see how bad this all looks?”

“No! Because it isn’t bad! It’s business. Besides, it shouldn’t matter,” she said, folding her arms over her chest. “You’re supposed to trust me, Alex, and it’s very clear you don’t.”

“It’s him I don’t trust!” He said, brandishing his glass towards the window as though Marcus was still out there .

“That doesn’t matter either,” she insisted. “You don’t get it, do you? I can’t control anyone else’s actions but my own, Alex. So, let’s say you’re right and Marcus is trying to get me into bed. Who the fuck cares? Because you should know that there’s nothing that would make me cheat on you. Nothing.”

“But–“

“No. There are no buts, Alex. It’s a simple concept, and you’re proving time and time again that despite me being nothing but loyal, you don’t trust me. There was no point in me coming back here.”

Surprisingly, Erica felt tears prickle at her eyes, wiping them on her shoulder angrily. Why did she let this stupid man get to her?

Damn him for still having a hold on her heart.

“Don’t leave again, Erica,” Alex said, taking a step towards her. “I’ve missed you.”

Liar.

“I’ve been so lost without you.” He reached for her hand, prompting her to take a step back.

Fucking liar.

“Please, Erica. Don’t be like that. You’re all I’ve thought about. Please. Just come here.”

Fucking lying, cheating bastard.

“What are we even doing, Alex?” She asked, ignoring his attempts to take her hand. “I mean, what is the point?”

“I don’t understand what—”

“Why are we still married?” She spat. Finally, he stopped advancing on her, his hand falling to his side as his grip on the tumbler loosened.

“Because we love each other,” he murmured. “At least I love you. Don’t… don’t you love me, Erica?”

“An impossible amount,” she said, meaning every word. “But what does that matter when you don’t trust me?”

Swallowing past a lump in her throat, Erica kept her gaze on Alex as she waited for an answer. Any answer.

She wanted him to take her in his arms, and yet never touch her again. Tell her he loved her, and it was all lies, and yet get on his knees and beg for forgiveness .

Most of all, she wanted him to be the man she fell in love with instead of the coward stood before her.

“Erica, I trust you,” he said, taking two long strides towards her and taking her hand before she could stop him. “I know I’ve been unbearable the past few weeks, but it drives me crazy the thought of any guy getting a part of you I don’t.”

She should have pulled away immediately, but curiosity makes fools of us all.

“What do you mean a part of me you don’t?”

“Well, like at the party. Tucked away in a corner, laughing harder than I’ve ever heard you with a man you barely know.

And now, less than two months later, you’re calling that same guy your business partner. What steps did I miss? How have the two of you become so entangled in each other’s lives?”

Unlike previously, when Alex demanded answers to scenarios he had completely made up in his head, he was trying to understand now, listening attentively.

If Erica was as nice as most people believed her to be, she would have softened the blow somewhat. But when presented with an opportunity to hurt the man who had caused her so much pain, she was going to take it with both hands.

“I don’t know, Alex. Sometimes people are just meant to be in your life.”

She relished the agony in his eyes, ignoring the bubbling of guilt in the pit of her stomach. Serves him right. He deserved every second of that pain and then some.

“You think he’s meant to be in your life?”

Twist that knife, Erica.

“I know he’s meant to be in my life.”

Alex took a step back, sinking onto the sofa as he stared blankly ahead. “In what capacity?”

He sounded like a broken man. A broken man who still did not fucking trust her.

“I haven’t figured that out yet,” she said, choosing her words carefully.

“Is he a threat to our relationship? ”

With a heavy sigh, Erica pushed her hand through her hair, shaking her head.

“No,” she growled, completely exasperated by this point. “The only threat to our relationship is you and this obsession you have that I’m cheating on you.”

“Can you fucking blame me, Erica? You’re acting like I’m crazy, but can you blame me?” Knocking back his drink, Alex scoffed and met her gaze. “Whether you want to admit it or not, it looks suspicious.”

“So divorce me then!”

The shock of her words silenced Alex, his eyes round. “I don’t want that. Seriously, Eri. You know that’s not what I want.”

“Then stop baiting me! Alex, I’m sick of having this argument. The facts are Marcus and I are working together and you either deal with it or you don’t.”

“Okay,” he said, holding his hands up in surrender. “Okay, I get it. I don’t like it but—”

“You don’t have to like it, you just have to shut up about it.” He nodded once in agreement. “Good. Because this isn’t just about me making a friend. This is me putting myself out there and doing something I’m excited about. It’s me making my own money and—”

“You’ve never needed to make your own money, Erica.”

“Needed to? No. You’ve taken care of me,” she admitted. “Want to? Absolutely. I need some independence, Alex.”

“Since when?”

“Since always,” she said with a sigh. “And I’m really surprised you have to be told that.”

Silence fell between them, each lost in their own thoughts.

Erica watched her husband, feeling her skin prickle at his hypocrisy. Even knowing how much she had done to convince him of her fake affair, she still felt incensed, knowing she was completely innocent of everything he was accusing her of.

Except for driving him crazy. She was absolutely doing that .

After the weekend she shared with Marcus, she could no longer stop herself from drawing comparisons between the two men.

If her life were a movie, Alex would be the villain. But the reality was, he was a fantastic husband. Infidelity aside, of course. But spending so much time with Marcus highlighted Alex’s shortcomings.

Although Alex was a good provider and had the resources to make her life as easy as possible, he had never appreciated the satisfaction Erica got from doing things by herself.

Marcus allowed her to celebrate all the things she was great at.

When she remembered his awe when presented with her folder of ideas, she still felt giddy. This was a man who appreciated her hard work and was as excited as she was to discuss it.

Over the weekend, they had ironed out a lot of the expected kinks and worked hard to make sure everything was in place.

In contrast, if he couldn’t throw money at a problem, Alex considered it beyond his capabilities. The number of times Erica had to watch a repairman change a fuse was infuriating.

Even with all that aside, the conversations she shared with these two men were so vastly different. It was shocking.

In the short time they had spent in one another’s company, she and Marcus had soon realised no topic was off limits. Once they’d worked through surface-level stuff like hobbies and favourite movies, they’d effortlessly moved into deeper topics of conversation.

With Alex, it was all surface-level.

After that first year together, it seemed the conversation ran out, and they stuck to what was safe without her realising it had happened. She couldn’t remember the last time they spoke about their aspirations for the future or the fears that held them back.

She felt some guilt for her part in that. Perhaps this was why he had looked at another woman. But then, Erica couldn’t imagine Sophie was full of stimulating conversation .

Would she have realised this on her own without Marcus drawing attention to it? Or was it the presence of him that made her take off the rose-tinted glasses and see that her marriage wasn’t the fairytale she once believed it was?

“What are you thinking?” She asked, watching the emotions play across his face. She had always thought Alex was easy to read, an open book. But there was no telling what was on his mind.

She held her breath, his answer suddenly important. She wanted him to tell her he was thinking about their marriage. His part in the distance between them. The ways he planned to help them improve.

Even if she knew it was a wasted effort, she wanted him to show that he cared. That he wanted to fight for their marriage.

“Nothing important,” he said, staring through her.

“Nothing… I’m sorry. Did you say nothing important?”

He shrugged and stood, pouring himself another drink that he immediately finished in three swallows. “I need to call Sophie.”

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. On the one hand, this was a good thing. It meant he was playing right into her hand and the plan was working.

But on the other hand, was he fucking serious?

“We have an important meeting in the morning. I need to make sure she’s got her shit together.”

He took a step towards her, kissing her cheek. “I’m glad you’re home, Eri. Don’t wait up though, okay?”

Before she could protest, he left her in the silence of their living room. Important or not, Alex had never needed to call an emergency meeting, and she highly doubted he needed to now.

Pulling her phone from her pocket, she dialled Marcus’ number, sneaking into the hallway to listen for Alex.

“Marcus,” she whispered as he answered. “What are you doing?”

Above her head, she could hear Alex’s rumbling voice as he spoke to someone on the phone.

“I’m still driving home. Why?” He paused. “Are you okay? I swear if he’s upset you— ”

“I’m fine,” she assured him. “He hasn’t. I think I upset him.”

“Shame that. A real shame.”

She bit her lip to stop her giggle. “He’s on the phone to Sophie. I think he’s trying to meet her.”

“Now? That’s bold of him.”

“I have a crazy idea,” she confessed.

“Am I going to like it?”

“Not even a little. In fact, I don’t even know why I’m suggesting it, because I’ll hate it too.”

“Oh, well, it sounds like a barrel of laughs,” he said, his tone teasing. “Sign me up.”

“I think we should follow them,” she said, the words releasing quickly on one breath.

“You’re right. I fucking hate it. Why would you want to do that, Erica?”

“You know how you always wanted us in view of the cameras?”

“Yeah,” he said with a sigh. “I said it’d help to have evidence of our innocence when it came to divorce.”

“And it would help to have evidence of their infidelity,” she replied. “Undisputable evidence that neither of them can deny.”

Marcus sighed again, and Erica had a horrible suspicion he was about to turn her down. “You realise you’re going to cause yourself a massive amount of pain?”

“Yeah, I know,” she admitted. “And if you really think we shouldn’t, or more importantly, you can’t handle it, I’ll drop it. I don’t want to see it either, and yet I do. I just… I think it’ll give me some closure.”

“You’re fucking crazy,” Marcus said.

“I know. It was dumb. Forget—”

“You’re crazy, but I’m crazier. If it’ll help you get some closure, I’m in. At this point, I’ll do anything to help you, Erica.”

Ignoring the butterflies in her stomach, Erica nodded to herself. “Thank you, Marcus.”

She was about to expose herself to something heartbreaking, and yet, for some reason, Erica couldn’t wipe the smile from her face.