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CALLYN

I show up every day. Once in the morning with Lord Jacob, and once in the afternoon with Verin. My mornings are full of drills, repetitive motions that teach me to block and punch and avoid contact. I expected Jacob to be as cold and aggressive as Verin, but he’s not. He treats me with the same passive regard as the rest of the recruits—which is to say he barely talks to me at all. I don’t mind, though. I can see why my mother would have liked this, how every movement is structured and planned, leaving no room for uncertainty. I’ve never wanted to be a soldier, but there’s something settling about the drills, the routine, the way I don’t need to think , I just need to do .

My afternoons with Verin, by contrast, are chaotic and full of pain.

Each day, she breaks my nose. Or a rib. Or a finger. Sometimes all three. Once she dislocates my shoulder, and it’s the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced, and I spend three minutes sobbing into the arena dirt that I’m going to kill her.

She never stops until the king calls a halt to her abuse and heals whatever she’s done.

I’m not a fan of this pattern.

At least I don’t have to go to bed with broken bones or torn ligaments. The king is swift to heal the damages she causes.

But . . . ?sometimes I don’t tell him about all of it. Sometimes I ignore a bruise or an ache or a twist in my gut, and I lie in bed at night and wonder if the magic in my mother’s pendant still works.

It always does. It’s slightly addictive, having this secret that no one knows, this power that undoes the damage in the arena. It’s a little flicker in my gut that tells me I can endure it again and again. Like a gift from my mother. Is this something she did, too? Endured hard training to achieve her rank, secretly healing her injuries so she could come back sharper and stronger? The idea that my mother and I might have a shared bond through this secret magic always lights me with a tiny glow.

I’ve needed the glow, because for days, I’ve wondered if Queen Lia Mara was secretly encouraging her sister’s abusive methods. I worried that she harbored all the same doubts that Verin voices every time she’s slamming me into the dirt. It made for a few uncomfortable encounters where I kept my eyes down and did my best to keep Sinna engaged with her dolls or her games.

But then I’ll remember what the king said. If I thought you were a risk to the princess, you wouldn’t be here.

Surely the queen is the same. Why would they let me care for Sinna just to torment me about it?

I’m even more reassured when the queen touches a hand to my cheek one morning. “Callyn, you’ve looked so troubled these past few days. I must apologize that I’ve been so . . . ?distracted. Am I asking too much of you? You must tell me if Sinna isn’t allowing you to get enough rest.”

Clearly Verin hasn’t told her what she’s doing. It leaves me feeling like this is all part of a test. Like Verin is waiting for me to complain.

So I don’t.

After a week, I finally earn a reprieve. I show up to a nearly deserted arena to learn that Verin has been called away by other duties. As the last of the soldiers clear out for the dinner hour, I stand in the dust and deliberate what to do. A part of me wants to go find some dinner for myself—but I worry that even this is a test, like someone would report to her that I’m lacking in dedication.

Though honestly, maybe I am. There’s a part of me that wants to abandon this all entirely, to leave Nora to the fun she’s having. But then I’ll think of the way Verin says things like, Your mother would be so disappointed , and I can’t quite bring myself to quit.

So in Verin’s absence, I practice what I have learned: simple blocks and thrusts and punches that don’t really seem to make any difference when Verin is pummeling me. The arena is so quiet, and I cast a glance at the fields. A few lingering soldiers are out there, and I wonder if the king is among them—and what he’d think of me working in here alone. Eventually, the soldiers move off before I can recognize any of them.

Until this moment, I didn’t consider that if Queen Lia Mara doesn’t know what Verin is doing, then the king must not have mentioned it either.

But . . . ?why? I try to work that through as I begin the endurance drills that Jacob makes the recruits do every morning. Now that my thoughts have a thread to follow, they want to chase it.

The more I think about it, the more I’m beginning to wonder if the king is mentioning much of anything to the queen at all.

That morning Nora and I saw Lord Alek in the hallway, the king was already awake and dressed, and I assumed that meant he’d been handling things overnight. But now that I’m training with the recruits in the morning, I see him at dawn often—never coming from the chambers he shares with the queen. Breakfast is laid out each morning, but I have yet to see them eat together. When I first arrived, I assumed that was due to the king’s early duties on the training fields, but now I wonder if there’s something else.

I consider the way the queen touched my cheek, when she said I looked tired.

I must apologize that I’ve been so . . . ?distracted.

In thinking back, she’s the one who looks tired. Or maybe sad.

But of course I’m not in a position to ask about her personal affairs.

I do know she was expecting a baby before she was kidnapped by the Truthbringers—but now she’s not. An official statement declared that the queen lost the baby during the attack, and I’ve heard enough whispered outrage in the palace halls to know it’s believed. The Truth-bringers were supposed to target the king and his magic, and to think that they harmed the queen and caused a miscarriage is a bit unthinkable.

But I protected the queen when she was held captive in my barn. I remember her voice when she said, There is no baby anymore.

It might be the story they’ve given the people, but I don’t think she lost the baby in the attack. She was dirty and bruised and anxious, but . . . ?it didn’t feel like something that had just happened. The way she said it was so final. Like something she’d accepted. It didn’t feel . . . immediate .

As much as I hate Alek, there’s one thing he said that keeps sticking in my brain, rolling around with my thoughts about the queen’s loss.

There are rumors that the king can’t control his magic. That he’s injured the queen somehow, but they’re hiding it.

I wish I could go back to that night and ask him the right questions.

I’m soaked in sweat now, and I’ve lost track of my laps around the arena. No one is left on the fields outside, and the torches hung from the wall are beginning to dim. I’m surprised to find that I enjoyed the physical activity. If anything, it helped shake the lingering worries out of my head. If this was a test, I’m not sure I care anymore. I’ll finish this round and go find Nora.

A man speaks from the shadows as I pass the far corner. “I had no idea you were so dedicated.”

I’m so deep in my thoughts that shock nearly sends me sprawling, and I stumble to a stop. Lord Alek stands by the railing, dressed in shades of gray and purple, his jacket buttoned tightly across his chest. He’s surely not dressed like someone who escaped from prison—but I doubt he’s supposed to be here .

I’m breathing hard, and my heart is still pounding from the run. My eyes flick to the doorway that leads into the palace, then to the distant armory, and finally to the wide opening that leads onto the training field. All deserted. Of course there are no guards around—no one needs to guard me . Should I shout for help? My mouth has gone dry.

“Did I frighten you?” he says flatly. “You seem concerned.”

Irritation replaces my sudden panic. “What are you doing here?”

“Fabrics and textiles are regularly delivered to the palace. Who exactly do you think oversees that?”

“You’re supposed to be in prison.”

He raises an eyebrow. “For what?”

Clouds above, he’s such an ass. “ For treason. ”

His gaze darkens. “Despite your own accusations and your sister’s charming demonstration in the hallway, there is absolutely no proof that I have engaged in treason.”

“You know what you did.”

“What did I do?” he says. “I was held in Emberfall during the attack in Briarlock. I was at the king’s side during the first events of the Royal Challenge. If I wanted to attack him, I had ample opportunity. I didn’t have to do it from afar.”

He wanted to kill the king. I know he did. He told me himself.

I inhale to say that, but Alek ducks under the arena railing to face me. “This attack was on the queen. I had no part in that.”

My mouth clamps shut again. He’s a liar. He must be. He’s been a liar since the very beginning.

But . . . this point doesn’t feel like a lie.

His loyalty to the queen has always been clear. Even when he was plotting against King Grey, it was to protect Queen Lia Mara.

I don’t want anything he says to be true. I turn away, striding for the armory so I can put up my training weapons. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Callyn.” He jogs after me and catches my arm.

I whirl, my fist ready. He’s better prepared than he was in the hallway, so he blocks effectively, but I must have learned something from my lessons, because I follow up with another strike from my left hand, and I almost get him. We tussle for a moment before he catches my wrist.

I’m glaring at him, and he’s glaring right back. “ There ,” he says. “Where’s that spirit when you’re fighting Nolla Verin?”

“You don’t know anything about my spirit .”

“I know you’ve let her drive you into the arena floor as if you deserve it. I know I’ve watched the king ”—the disdain in his voice is clear—“heal your injuries while you whimpered. You’ve hardly defended yourself.”

Rage swells in my chest. “You’ve been watching me?” I demand.

“I just told you that I have reasons for visiting the palace.” He pauses, staring down at me. “I can’t help it if I find the arena entertaining when I do.”

I set my jaw. I don’t want to be talking to him. “You’re a traitor and a liar. Let me go.”

To my surprise, he does, and we stand there facing each other. I don’t know what else to say to him. He manipulated me. He used me. He threatened my sister. He lies about everything, and somehow makes it all sound so convincing, because even now, there are flickers in my heart that desperately want to believe him.

Alek watches my expression, then sighs. “I never lied to you, Callyn.” His voice lowers a bit. “Never once.”

I heard his voice like that once before, and I almost soften. I have to steel my spine. “Go away. You have no business with me.”

“I have business in the palace, though. Often, in fact.” He takes a step forward, and I refuse to yield ground. It puts him very close, until I can see the blue of his eyes in the dimness of the arena. His voice lowers further. “That’s how I’ve heard the terrible things Verin says to you.”

That gets me. I swallow and glance away.

Alek touches a finger to my chin and drags my gaze back. “ You did not kidnap the queen. You did not endanger the princess. You did not even lure the Truthbringers to Briarlock. You protected the queen while guards and soldiers in the palace held her prisoner. Where was Verin then, hmm? It seems convenient that she publicly humiliates you , when it’s obvious that someone with power and access had to be conspiring against the entire royal family.” He pauses, his eyes blazing into mine. “Speaking of power and access, where is Verin tonight? Her own thoughts about the king have never been much of a mystery.”

I suck in a breath, but he lets me go. Verin is the queen’s sister . She has more power and access than almost anyone. All of a sudden, I don’t know what to say.

I keep hearing the king’s voice in my head, the way he said, She hates everyone.

Alek nods and takes a step back. “Someone did conspire against the queen, Callyn. But it wasn’t me—and it wasn’t you. It was someone here . Keep that in mind when you’re inhaling arena dirt and begging her to stop.”

I can’t listen to this. I can’t be in his presence one minute longer. He always twists up my thoughts and makes me feel like I don’t understand anything at all.

I scowl and turn away, but this time he doesn’t come after me. “You’re just trying to turn me against them,” I call as I duck under the arena railing. “Just like you turned me against Jax. It won’t work this time.”

I don’t bother with the armory. I leave the weapons and armor on and shove through the doorway and into the palace hallway. Dinner must be in full swing, because the scent of roasted poultry and honeyed vegetables is overpowering. The sound of rattling dishes and cutlery from the kitchen echoes loudly. I half expect Alek to be right behind me, but the door at my back stays closed.

He probably thinks I’ll keep his visit a secret. He probably thinks I won’t say a word to anyone, that he took his traitorous blue eyes and looked into my soul, and now I’ll go to bed dreaming of him, waiting for his next appearance so I can help him bring down all of Syhl Shallow.

But I was already stupid once. I’m not eager to do it again.

I square my shoulders and set off to find the queen.