Page 13

Rushing through the path lining the pack lands, I stop off to grab a Silvery Lupine before briskly walking down the path back towards our cabins.

Before I come around the final corner leading to our front porches, I slow to a stop to check the time.

It’s 4:00 P.M. meaning she’s just left from Lou’s shop and should be heading this direction.

I’ve got only seconds to drop this flower off and move back towards the Pack House and my office.

I need her to think I’m just coming home from work, not that I’ve been running all over town.

Glancing around to ensure nobody is looking, I sneak up to her front porch and take the three steps up. I’ll put the flower on her porch swing. There’s no way she won’t see it there. I’ve just laid down the flower when I smell her scent. Fuck. She’s close.

Jumping over the railing, I rush to her backyard.

I’ll have to cut across to the other road to avoid being seen by her.

My heart is racing as I silently move across the grass between the houses.

Praying to the Goddess that she doesn’t look between the cabins to see me ducking away.

The second my feet hit the dirt path on the opposite side, I let out a shuddering breath. That was too close for comfort.

Bracing my hands on my knees as I heave out a breath, I sneak a look over my shoulder down the gap between the cabins. She isn’t standing there staring at me. I don’t see her at all actually. Good, hopefully she went inside like nothing was amiss.

When my heart rate drops down to a normal level again, I walk down the main path leading to the Pack House. Now all I’ve got to do is walk home after work. I want to work some more on her business proposal before I call it a night.

It’s almost dusk before I come up for air again.

Her business proposal is coming along nicely.

Granted I had to research quite a bit to determine exactly what all she would need.

I’ve even called Silas about the open business property downtown to see about the cost of that.

I didn’t elaborate or anything, but he has connections being a member of the city council and all that.

I rub my eyes before checking the time. 8:30 P.M. I need to head home before she tucks in for the night. I don’t know what time she is planning to drink the tea, I can only hope that I’ve not missed it.

The sky outside is awash with oranges giving it an almost creamsicle look as I walk down the path towards our cabins. Willow’s, a bartender at Pour Me Another, cabin is dark but Hazel’s, the owner of Flick the Bean Coffee Shop, has the lights on letting me know at least one of them is home.

The bedroom light is on in Selene’s parents’, June and Rowan, room as I pass by their cabin. Selene’s room is dark—did she go to bed already? As I come around the corner, disappointment already seeping in, I find Selene sitting on her porch swing with a mug in her hand.

Seems I didn’t miss the tea drinking after all.

I can feel her eyes on me as I walk down the path.

The urge to look at her is too strong to resist. Glancing up I find her staring right at me.

Eyes unblinking, almost as if I’m the white rabbit walking in front of the starving wolf.

A smile breaks across my face as I lift my hand and wave at her.

Oh fuck. I’m waving at her. I’m smiling at her.

She isn’t blinking. She doesn’t lift her hand to wave back or even react to what I just did. Maybe I’ve gotten this all wrong.

Shoving my hand into my pocket, I turn to walk up my stairs.

Just get into the house. What was I thinking smiling and waving at her like we’re friends?

Just because I can’t get her out of my mind, doesn’t mean that she feels or thinks the same way.

Her bumping into me at Gail’s office and now staring at me has everything jumbled in my mind.

I don’t know what to think of all of it.

I need my math book and my chamomile tea. She might be the one drinking clarity tea tonight, but I’m the one that’s going to need a calming tea.

My favorite book, The Golden Ratio, sits on my small bookshelf in my living room. I’ve collected books on just about every mathematician throughout history along with a few scientists that have used math to make major discoveries in our world.

My home feels just like my office. Cold, sterile, and orderly.

You almost wouldn’t think someone lived here with the lack of personal touches.

When I was given this cabin, I arranged the furniture in a way that was clutter free and kept the flow of the house easy to use.

I don’t have any family photos along the walls or overdone decor.

The most personal touch is my math books, the Leonardo Da Vinci human model, and my herbal tea collection.

Some would find it odd that I don’t have family photos, or even snap shots hanging on my fridge, but if I could disconnect myself any further from them, I would.

I would prefer there is never any proof that I’m connected to that family.

My kettle sits exactly where I left it, sitting on the back burner of my stove top, ready for the next batch of tea. I prefer loose-leaf tea over the prepackaged dust particles they serve in stores. Often times I’ve let Gail mix up a new tea for me to try as it’s something I enjoy drinking.

The glass bottles tink against each other as I pull down the one’s I need for tonight’s tea.

Chamomile flowers for relaxation, lavender buds for soothing, lemon balm leaves for uplifting, and spearmint leaves for a bit of sweetness.

Dropping the leaves into the metal pod, I clasp it closed before pouring the water into the kettle.

It doesn’t take long for the water to boil.

Turning the burner off, I let that steep for a few minutes while I pull down my mug and agave syrup.

My wooden tea spoon sits balanced on the lip of the saucer plate.

My mug is handmade from the pottery class we hold once a month in the Pack House as a fun project for the elders.

I don’t partake but I’ve been known to buy the pieces.

With my tea in hand, I grab my book and head out to the porch.

Finding Selene still exactly where I last saw her, I can’t help but smirk.

Avoiding looking at her for fear of what I might see, I move to my own porch swing and sit down.

The bitter sweet tea washes over my tongue as I take the first sip.

Later that evening as I pace back and forth in my bedroom, the restless energy between my wolf and I has prevented me from resting.

He wants to go watch over her as she sleeps and I want him to realize how creepy that is.

Since I’ve refused what he’s asked, we have spent the better part of three hours arguing.

“What if we just go check on her? She might be hurt.”

I grumble because even I know that’s a sad excuse. “You know she’s fine.”

“Alright, what about that silly flower you picked up and didn’t give her?”

“I was going to give that to her tomorrow.”

“What about right now?”

“She’s sleeping. Something we should be doing.”

“What if we leave it as a surprise for her?”

“This is dumb Calix. Where would we leave it?”

“On her desk in her room.”

“We can’t…” But it’s too late. The idea has taken root. Just the thought of being able to see her. I’m too exhausted to fight him when he takes over. He shifts into our humanoid form, I’m assuming to carry the flower in a hand instead of a mouth.

I watch as he does something I could never do. Takes action.

He walks around the back of her house to where her window sits cracked open. Why is her window open? I watch as his large gray hand reaches over, quietly pushing it open.

“You know there’s no way my form is fitting through this window. It’s up to you to do this part Cal.”

“I can’t.”

“It’s either you go through or I shove this massive form through. Which do you think will wake her first?”

“Let’s just go home.”

“Alright, here I go…” He lifts himself up, hiking a leg as if he could actually fit.

“Stop!!! Fine. I’ll do it. Last thing we need is her waking up to your large ass falling through a window.”

The change happens fast and what was once a large gray hand is now my much smaller human hand holding the lip of the window.

Lifting myself up, I slide easily through the open window. Quietly stepping my foot down.

“I’m leaving the flower and that’s it. No funny business.”

“Don’t you want to see what she looks like while she is sleeping?”

“No, you weirdo. I want to get out of this room before she wakes up.”

“She’s right there Cal. Look at her.”

“No.”

“I bet she’s even more beautiful when she’s dreaming.”

She turns in her sleep, letting out a low whimper. “Who are you?”

We freeze. Did she wake up? She turns again as a low whine leaves her lips.

“Stop running from me and just tell me who you are,” she mumbles in her sleep.

“She’s dreaming,” Calix says in wonder.

“Yeah and I feel like I’m going to pass out.”

“Pussy.”

“Whatever. We’re leaving.” I don’t give him a chance to argue with me as I pull myself back out the window and into the backyard.

“You have to admit, you had a tiny bit of fun doing that,” Calix prods.

“I did not.”

“Just a smidge of fun?”

“No.”

When I finally make it back into our bedroom, Calix finally calms down enough for us to lay down. I’m just about to fall asleep when…

“Calix, why do you think we are drawn to her?”

“You haven’t figured it out yet?”

“Figured out what yet?”

“For someone so smart, you really are missing the point. I guess you’ll know soon enough.” He moves all the way to the back of our shared mind space. Leaving me with more questions than answers.