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She holds out the sheet of paper she was searching for.

It’s not an Excel sheet, it’s not even typed up.

The scratches of an ink pen are covering the sheet.

“I know it’s not fancy like your ledger, but I’m old and set in my ways.

That’s the rough outline of what I think we will need.

I can have one of these young pups type that up into an Excel sheet if that would be more ideal. ”

I am cringing so hard internally, I can feel my stomach tying in knots as I attempt, and fail at reading what she wrote.

I’m not sure I could even decipher this with a key code handed over by her.

The rough loops and scrolls of her letters are almost ancient in their design.

I can see the basics of the numbers at least, thank the Goddess for that.

“And,” she says, dragging out the word. “I was hoping to talk to you about helping Selene with startup costs for her photography business.”

My eyes immediately stop their scanning of the paper and lift to Gail who’s sitting behind her desk with a mischievous smirk on her face.

Calix wakes back up from his slumber, suddenly really interested in the math he normally grumbles about.

“Say yes Cal. Now!”

“You sure she wants my help?” I ask as I drop the paper back on top of the desk between us.

“She hasn’t asked for it, if that’s what you’re wondering,” Gail replies, undeterred from her goal.

“I know you’ve seen her work, Lou tells me all about your daily drop-ins for copies of her work.

She’s got the eye for it and you know it.

All she needs is a little push to take that leap of faith.

This town could use a gallery, or maybe a studio space?

Somewhere to hone her craft? Don’t you think so? ”

She leans forward, resting her weight on her forearms. Her eyes are flicking between mine, almost as if she is trying to read my thoughts.

Reaching over, she brings her steaming mug of tea to her lips as she continues to watch me.

My knee begins to bounce beneath the desk, I can almost feel her rooting around in my mind.

I don’t think I like the fact that I can’t hide from her, so exposed.

She hums triumphantly, as if I’ve already agreed to her proposal. She’s always ten steps ahead of us, knowing things that you know she wasn’t told.

I rub the back of my damp neck, my nerves getting the better of me.

I can feel the sheen of sweat covering my skin from being under her keen eye for too long already.

“Let me run the numbers,” I say carefully.

“There might be room in the next rounds of business investments for the Third Quarter. Since it’s already June, I’ll have to be quick about it since our budget meeting is at the beginning of July. ”

Gail smiles like she has already won. “Atta boy. I knew you would see it.”

Not sure what she means, I push myself up from the chair, wishing to run back to the safety of my office.

“If there’s nothing else, I really need to get back to running the numbers for the Summer Solstice. Speaking of Selene, maybe you should ask her to take photos during it?”

She quirks an eyebrow at me, and I already know I’m not going to like the next words out of her mouth. “Maybe…but I think you should. Great opportunity for you to open up about the photography business. Maybe help her make some business cards?”

I shake my head in disappointment. I fucking knew it. “Yeah, I don’t know about all that Gail. You know I’m not good with people.”

She hums. “I don’t think you’ll have a problem with this one. Just take the leap of faith Cal.”

With her final words pinging around my mind, I walk into my office. My office feels lifeless compared to Gail’s warm, earthy tones. Everything about mine is clean lines, nothing out of place, and creams with leather accents. My office smells of paper, ink, and long nights.

My desk is exactly how I left it, my computer still showing the screen with my Excel sheet. The little cursor is blinking in the empty block where I was in the middle of a calculation.

The numbers aren’t calling to me, the thing I’ve used to comfort me is quiet. There’s only one thing on my mind right now and she’s long gone.

Opening a clean spreadsheet, I know one set of numbers that are calling to me.

Selene Photography : Business Draft Proposal

It starts simple. Building the proposal sections and preparing the sheet for the numbers.

It’s a process I’ve done many times before, familiar to me like the feel of my skin beneath my fingers.

I start with the average equipment moving quickly to estimates for potential business spaces.

There is a property downtown that has been standing empty since the last tenants closed shop.

It would be a great space for a gallery.

I don't realize how deep into the numbers I’ve gone until I see the shadows across my desk as the sun moves behind the trees outside my window.

Fuck. If I want to make it to Flash Me Studio before Selene, I’ll have to leave right this second.

Hitting ‘save’ on the spreadsheet I’m making for her, I log out and turn off my computer.

Swiping my phone off the desk, I rush out of my office, turning right to walk out the side door instead of taking the time to walk out the front door.

The bell over Flash Me Studio gives a cheerful jingle, but I don’t have time for lingering.

She should be here any minute now. Lou lets out a laugh when she sees me rushing over to her counter.

We’ve had an arrangement for weeks now, I get copies of Selene’s photos, give extra cash for Lou’s secrecy, and leave.

The envelope feels lighter today compared to the others.

I look at Lou who only shrugs before going back to cleaning the lens of the camera sitting in pieces on the countertop.

“Yep, they’re good. Seems like somebody’s wolf is gettin’ in on the action. Now, you ain’t gonna tell me you don’t know nothin’ ‘bout that, are ya?”

I only smirk at her before I walk back out of her studio.

I can smell Selene’s scent on the wind, she’s close. Ducking across the street, I walk behind Crust Issues to take the back way to avoid being seen. I’ve got one more stop to make before I head to my cabin, hopefully at the same time she’s drinking her tea.

Her meadow, the one she sneaks away to each morning, sits vast and empty aside from the birds chirping from within the trees.

A soft breeze moves the flowers and grass as it ripples across the valley.

The quiet movement of the water across the river bed is a soothing balm across my soul.

I can easily see why she loves this space, not for the wildness of it, but for the serenity it offers.

It feels as though you’re part of a different world, one only you’ve discovered.

With no touch of the human hand, you almost feel as though you’re the first one to step foot on the grass, to sniff the mountain breeze, and capture the mental image of it.

With over twenty different species of wildflower growing in the area, I let my soul guide me to the one that’s calling out to me.

I’ve got no idea what any of these are called, something I’m sure Selene could tell me.

We both know she has a leather journal full of flower clippings, leaves, and feathers from her time in the woods.

There amongst the array of flowers are these tiny purple trumpet flowers.

Their vibrant deep purple petals called to me.

I don’t think I’ve seen her collect these before, something new that she could write about.

Bending down, I pinch the stem, breaking off a couple of them before wrapping them in the tissue I brought just for this.

I’ll drop these off on her front porch and watch as she learns more about them.

Her fascination with plants is almost equal to my fascination with numbers. Where I could sit and do math for hours, she can sit with an encyclopedia learning all about the flower she found.

I first realized it when she was only seven years old and she drug her mother’s herbology book into the backyard one spring afternoon.

I had been out back watching the clouds move across the sky, using math to predict the odds of certain clouds forming when I heard this little voice say, “I’ll find you in this book,” before she sat down Indian style with a book far too big for her little hands.

Suddenly the clouds held no interest to me anymore, only this little girl with a curiosity just like mine.

I spent the rest of the afternoon watching her as her face scrunched in confusion only to quickly widen with amazement.

I knew there was no way she could read any of the words, but the look of wonderment on her face, now that's what I could understand.

My thumb brushes over the petals of this dainty purple flower as I smile at the memory of seven-year-old Selene.

Every day after that she would drag that same book out into the backyard for hours, flipping through the pages and comparing the plants of her yard to those in the book.

Over the years I watched it go from only knowing the pictures, to learning the words, to knowing the species of flowers.

One day I hope she’ll tell me all about this purple flower and the rest of them in this valley. Carefully pocketing the flower, I check the time on my cell. 3:45 P.M. stares back up at me. I’ve got 15 minutes to make it to the other flower before dropping the first one off on her porch.