Page 18 of Burning Demons (Burning Torments #1)

Chapter 18

Wren

Sienna and Tate had exchanged numbers, but I doubted that was who he was frowning about as he stuffed his phone back in his pocket. He did that often. At random times, he’d stare down at his phone, most often with a deep breath and clenched jaw, then put it away without responding to whatever was there or talking about it. In some of my more shameful moments, I’d thought about snooping and checking out what kept him so agitated.

Only thoughts. I never acted on them.

Our punishment for the fight was long over, so today after school, I’d surprised him with a trip to Dairy Queen on our way home and wrenched a smile from him. He’d been a little distant and distracted lately, and I couldn’t seem to pinpoint exactly why. I thought this might cheer him up, and I’d been right, apparently.

“Is this a date?” he asked when I parked.

I only grinned and winked. The little laugh he gave me in return made me realize I hadn’t heard it in weeks.

Since Sam closed the pool, it seemed as if we’d been at this standstill of sorts. I didn’t want to be here, and I didn’t know how or why we got here, but there it was. Maybe with the water hiding parts of us we weren’t ready to reveal or the sanctuary we’d made it into, we’d been unable to find a way outside of that safety net. I didn’t consider either of us a coward, but it was high time one or both of us found our balls and put this thing into a higher gear.

I rushed around the truck as fast as possible without making it appear as obvious as I felt and opened the door for Tate. He paused for only a second, a pretty pink hitting his cheeks, before lowering his chin and heading inside.

A short line gave us enough time to stand shoulder to shoulder as we checked out the menu over the heads of the workers, but not too much time to make it weird that we were standing so close.

“Know what you want?” I asked a little closer to his ear than I needed to be. He shivered and glanced at me before stepping to the counter.

“Banana split,” he told the girl.

“Same,” I said.

As we waited, Tate chewed his bottom lip and scanned everywhere inside the DQ except at me. Granted, we weren’t out, and this wasn’t a date as I’d like it to be, but in some mixed-up way, it was my first date. And I was as nervous as I expected I’d be.

I took the tray when it was handed to me and headed for the little stone courtyard outside. Fall had hit a little cooler than normal this year, so we had the place to ourselves. Three curved benches surrounded a round table. We didn’t sit next to each other on one but on the inner ends of two of them. Close, but not together.

“Date number two will be someplace proper,” I said once we were settled and alone.

“Yeah?” Tate licked a glob of ice cream off his spoon. “And what do you consider proper?”

Uh. My brain went off-line at the sight of his tongue doing things I’d dreamed about. Well, not with a spoon but with the tip of my dick. I shook out of it and adjusted myself.

“You know.” I stared down at the swirls of syrups in my bowl. “Dinner someplace nice.” How. Lame.

Tate chuckled and waved at the outside seating area. “This place is nice enough for me.”

“Don’t do that,” I said.

“What?”

“I know you’ve gotta be used to nicer places. Bet your ex took you to restaurants that required a dress code.” His smile fell, so I went on. “I mean, you shouldn’t have to set your expectations low.”

He dropped his spoon in the bowl and wrapped his arms around his chest. “It’s not about lowering anything. The place doesn’t make the date. We can go sit at that cemetery with a bag of boiled peanuts, and it could still be an awesome date.”

“You cold?” I asked, not ready to let the chastisement over my surface-level ideas about dating get to me.

Tate shrugged.

I tossed my spoon as well. “What did I say?”

He snapped his gaze to mine.

“Come on. You’ve been weird for weeks. I’m trying to get us out of sneaking around at night, not that I don’t enjoy kissin’ you like that, but I know you deserve better.”

He snorted.

“Tate,” I barked. “What the fuck. Tell me. I wanna …” Jesus, why was this so hard?

I glanced over my shoulder at the store, then at our deserted surroundings. No one was here. No one was at the windows, and we were hidden from the street by the parked cars. Still, I couldn’t bring myself to reach for him in the open like this.

Keeping my voice low but putting as much frustration into it as I could, I said, “What’s bothering you? Is it me? Us? Were you out and proud in New York and hating me for being—not?”

His nostrils flared, and his lips tightened, and that was all the answer I got.

That night, I only practiced pieces for school, using muscle memory so my brain could play a different tune. Tate’s tune. This thing between us was getting serious in ways I never saw coming.

I supposed early on, when my imagination couldn’t stop picturing Tate in every porn scenario I could conjure, it hadn’t occurred to me that I cared about him for more than sex or means of release. I did, though. I’d fallen, and I wasn’t turning back.

Now, I just needed to figure out how to keep going. A major obstacle would be talking to Momma and Sam. They needed to know. If nothing else, I wanted to tell Momma that I was into guys. Not that I needed this coming out thing or whatever, but I didn’t want her blindsided by it. Plus, if they knew, then we’d at least have a place where we could get out of the shadows, if nowhere else. Or if I got these things off my chest, it’d free up some bandwidth to figure out how to get Tate talking to me again. Him shutting down on me sucked.

While I was busy in my head, Tate seemed to come to his own answers about whatever had been plaguing him. That very next day at school, I’d walked into the cafeteria, and as soon as I spotted him waiting at our normal table, he smiled. Call it simple all you want, but the mundane gesture was anything but on him.

“Hey,” he said in his soft, sweet way that’d missed more than I realized.

I pulled the tray between us closer, knowing he’d got it for me. “Hey. You should eat this.”

“But you know I won’t.”

And just like that, it was as if the last few weeks hadn’t been as stressful or as dramatic as I’d made out in my mind. Our words weren’t laced with undertones of frustration. I was dying to ask what had changed for him, but I didn’t want to risk setting us back.

Tate groaned and put his head down on his fisted hands. “Fuck, I need a cigarette.”

“Then have one,” I heard myself say, which wasn’t what I should’ve said. No, I should’ve told him to drop the bad habit.

He blinked as he stared, then finally sighed. “I’m almost out. I thought I could cut back.” He exhaled. “Nope. Can’t.”

Could he have just been grouchy for trying to cut back on smoking? I hadn’t considered that. He’d been lighting up as usual, but maybe it’d been less?

“Stuff food in your mouth instead.” I pushed the tray toward him.

He straightened, shoved the tray back, and shook his head, sending brown waves dancing across his emerald eyes.

“Aren’t you hungry?” I asked.

He propped his chin on his hands and turned left and right to pop his neck. “No.”

Tate ate breakfast and what I’d call a snack’s worth for supper, most days. I’d be starving, but for him, he rarely ever seemed hungry.

I pulled the tray back in front of me. “How were your classes?” I asked to get us talking and hopefully on something we wouldn’t be able to argue about.

“Fine. I’ve done all this before.”

“Shit, wish I could say that.”

Tate snorted. “Eh. It gets boring. You struggling?”

“No, not really, just not focusing like I should.”

“Me?”

I nodded while shoving food in my mouth.

One of those looks crossed his face. The kind that told me something was going on in his head, but not enough to tell me what it was. “You ready for the concert this Friday?” he asked.

“No.”

“Bullshit. Yes, you are.”

The orchestra band’s first concert was always at an assembly before the homecoming game. Nothing huge. Some easy shit to get us in the mood for playing in front of an audience. The pressure, the lights, all of it. Most non-band students skipped, which was fine with me.

“Do I get to see Wren in a suit?”

I snorted. “No. Maybe Wren in a nicer T-shirt.” We didn’t even wear suits when we performed for parents. A white button-down and dark slacks were all that was required. It was a public school, after all. Some kids couldn’t afford much, not even an instrument to practice on at home.

He stretched his arms, and I couldn’t help but think he was stretching for me. Reaching, passing it off as innocent, when he really wanted to grab me.

“I’ll take Wren any way I can get him.”

My imagination perked up, and my dick twitched, enjoying the images playing out. I curled my lips for a second, then froze and scanned around us. No one was nearby. Girls were watching us from other tables, but unless they were lip readers, all was good.

Before him, I would assume they were staring at my scar. Now, it was just irritating, no matter the reason. Not enough to make me hide, though. Which was surprising, at first. I didn’t wanna hide. I wanted to be seen with Tate. I wanted to be in his atmosphere. This gorgeous guy across from me was worth it. Strong to vulnerable. I wanted everything that he was. I wanted his atoms surrounding mine. I wanted mine surrounding his.

“That’s some deep thinking you got going on over there,” he said.

I dropped the pizza crust I’d forgotten I was holding and pushed the tray back. Tate blinked as he stared at the food still on the plate.

“You feeling okay?”

It was a legitimate ask. I didn’t normally push away food, but I was full on something else.

I flicked my gaze around, then landed back on him. “Yeah. Maybe.”

“Maybe? What’s up, Big Country?”

I could ask him the same, but I didn’t. One of us had to take that step out of the shadow. Maybe this first level of darkness only affected us, the one where we hid how into each other we were, but I was ready to bring the truth into the light.

Leaning forward slightly, I grinned, and then he did too. I hoped we just looked like two stepbrothers sharing a secret or maybe just talking closer because of the noise. The hunger in my soul was fighting its way out of me, and I hoped no one could see it.

“I think I’m obsessed with you,” I admitted. I didn’t care if it sounded crazy or too much. It was the truth. I had to lie to everyone, but not him. Never to him. Never again anyway. “I’m into you, City Boy, in a big way.” I snorted when he widened his eyes and let his mouth fall open. “I think that’s what I was trying to say when I butchered all that date shit yesterday.”

He snapped his jaw shut, and just when I thought he might revert back into that closed-off person he’d been, he narrowed his eyes and said, “You going to try again or what?”

I chuckled, left the smile on my face, and said, “If you’ll let me.”

He nodded.

I glanced around again, but nothing had changed except me. With his attention and this chance to do it right, something like bravery flooded my veins and lifted my chin.

“You’re mine, Tate.” He chewed his lips, and I hurried on before I got distracted by them. “Not sure if you know that, and maybe I wasn’t showing you, but you are.” I lowered my voice, which made him lean in a little more. “I don’t wanna just kiss you in the night. I want you to be mine, my boyfriend.”

Tate smiled, like full-on blinding smiled. My throat dried up. Actually, everything dried up. Blood rushed from my head, moisture fled my eyeballs, and even the dampness from my breath evaporated from my lungs. Tate smiling, really smiling, took over his whole body and was the most inspiring thing I’d ever seen.

“Holy shit, Tate.”

We jerked upright as if we’d been caught doing something we shouldn’t and turned just as Sienna lowered her camera.

“You should be a model, for real. You’ve got such range.”

He cocked his head to one side and screwed up his lips, then shrugged. Tate was total model material. Sienna was right. From brooding to happy, Tate had an edge. The kind of edge that had you dying to know what was provoking his moods and what was going on behind his eyes.

“Maybe this week, we can start doin’ some of those pictures for my calendar.”

“Yeah, okay,” he said.

She finally turned to me, the best friend she’d all but forgotten about this year. “Don’t forget about helping us with our festival booth, okay?”

“I won’t,” I assured her. This week was not only my first performance of the year for school or homecoming but the fall festival too. With all the excitement buzzing, there was no way I could forget.

Just then, Sienna pitched forward, and her camera tumbled free. Sienna was leaning into me, and without pushing her out of the way, I had no hope of saving it.

Tate launched forward, snagged it with one hand, then thrust it at her chest. Sienna grabbed it with both arms, cradling the camera as if it were a baby.

It all happened in seconds, and then he was toe to toe with Spencer. “Watch it,” Tate growled.

Spencer had probably pushed Sienna intentionally because he was an asshole like that.

In that short breath of time, we had the attention of the entire room. Conversations hushed all around us as eyes widened and waited. Teachers perked up and moved a few paces closer, probably waiting to see if this would resolve itself before getting involved.

Vengeance sparked in Spencer’s narrowed eyes. He kept his hands at his sides, but they were clenched and shaking.

“Come on, man,” one of the Wolf Pack coaxed Spencer, but it didn’t work.

“Listen to your fuckbuddies, Spencer,” Tate hissed. The easy smile from before had been replaced by an expression so dark it had me wondering if this hatred between them was about more than Spencer being a bully.

“Watch yourself, Decker. One day, your brother won’t be there for a cheap shot,” Spencer said.

When I stood, gasps went up from the eerily silent room. Everything outside of Tate blurred, became secondary. It didn’t matter if we had an audience or what they were thinking. No one would threaten Tate, ever.

“I’m here now, Spencer. Feel like getting your ass kicked again and thrown off the football team?”

And speak of the devil, Coach stepped into the thick of it, grabbed the back of Spencer’s neck, and barked, “There a problem?”

He was probably the only one who could’ve diffused the scene. Spencer wanted to play football more than he wanted to fight. For now, at least. He had a hard-on for Tate that was growing every day. When the season was over, I was confident he’d try something.

“No, sir,” Spencer gritted out before stalking off. Color me shocked that he’d waited this long to make a scene. Since Labor Day weekend, I’d expected him to blow up or retaliate. And maybe he really was all bark, only picking the fights, words or fists, when he knew he’d win.

Tate glared at Spencer’s back until he was across the room.

“You cool?” I asked.

He nodded.

Our classmates returned to their seats and conversations but not really to their own business as they kept an eye darting between us and the Wolf Pack. I dipped my head to Sienna, who was staring off and shaking a little.

“Hey. You okay?”

She shook her head. “I don’t like fighting.”

I grinned. “There wasn’t one.” I felt her forehead with the back of my hand. “You hallucinating? Drop some acid before lunch? That shit’s bad for you.”

She jerked as my teasing registered, then dipped her head away and slapped at my hand. “Get off me, Big Country.”

“Stop calling me that.”

“He does.” She glanced at Tate as if to point out which he she meant.

“ He can, but you’re not him, so …” It was as close to coming out to her as I could get right now. But her stupidly strong mind-reading powers understood it anyway.

Sienna’s eyes popped wide like saucers. “He …” Blink. “You …” Blink. Blink. “You two are … Oh my gosh!”

“Sienna,” Tate and I said at the same time with a warning clear in our tone.

She huffed and tossed her hair. “As if. You know me better than that, Wren Bailey Wilkerson.” She spun on her heels and stalked off.

Tate leaned his upper body closer. “Was that what I think it was?”

Sienna bounced her way to the exit and ran smack into Alex, who grabbed her upper arms to steady her. He smiled at her as she talked a mile a minute. She’d never say anything to anyone, I was sure. As she talked, she gestured to the Wolf Pack, most likely filling Alex in on what happened.

“Yeah. We just …” Fucking came out to my best friend. I turned to him, brows raised. He hadn’t answered me about being my boyfriend or not, but given all we’d done, I didn’t think he’d say no.

“Did we really?” Tate had gone a little more pale.

“She won’t talk.”

We sat back down, and as the shock of the moment wore off, the weight on my shoulders was a bit lighter. Someone knew about us. And with one black cloud removed, there were hints of gray pointing to the light of my future. This was the right path; I was sure of it. Now, I needed to come clean to Momma and Sam, confirm with Tate he was mine, and then figure out the rest of my life.

Easy.