Page 8 of Brutal Alpha Beast (Roseville Alphas #2)

Crap. I should have cast an orb of light to guide me through the forest; then, I would have seen him and had time to turn back.

I didn’t expect him or anyone else to be here. It’s such a random spot.

“Danielle?” He asks. I can barely make out his face beneath the darkness. But I can hear in his voice that he’s pissed off.

“Hey,” I say softly. “What’s up?”

What’s up? Gosh, could I sound any more suspicious?

I have a fear that somehow Ellis will remember our past. Just being here, in this spot where everything happened all those years ago, is triggering me worse than I thought.

“How did you find this place?” He asks, stepping toward me.

I hate the way it makes me feel when he gets close.

I swallow. Where’s all my bravery from this morning gone? I felt in control then, when I was showing everyone how the spells would work.

But now, I feel like the witch I was all those years ago, hiding herself in a pack full of shifters who hate her.

“It’s not that hard to find,” I say.

There’s a beat of uncomfortable silence, and I take a step back from him. It’s not that I’m scared—maybe I should be? He’s a tall, powerful Alpha, and we’re alone together in the woods.

But I’m powerful, I remind myself. I’m also strong.

“It sort of is,” he counters, “we’re deep in the woods, past any obvious paths, and from the other side of the shed, it’s not exactly obvious that there’s space back here.”

My chest freezes. I hate how close he’s getting to the truth.

“I was walking around the woods, and I stumbled upon it. Is that so hard to believe?”

“Yes,” he says.

“What exactly do you think I’m doing, then?” I ask him, irritated. “What could I possibly be out here for?”

The truth of why I’m out here, hanging around our old favorite spot, is not particularly exciting. The reason I’m here is that I was curious about what it would look like after all these years.

Would the shed still be intact? The trees in place? Could it have been turned into something else?

The idea came to me earlier this morning when we were tending to the trees in the woodland. I thought, what if I just slip off for a few moments to check?

But in broad daylight, it would have been too obvious. It would have looked suspicious—just the way it’s looking to Ellis now.

But why the hell is he here?

“I don’t know what you’re doing,” he mutters, grumpily matching my irritation. “I don’t understand a lot of what you do, but this place is not somewhere you just stumble upon.”

While I sort of understand his suspicion, it irritates the hell out of me because all I’ve done since I’ve been here is help him. I haven’t caused any problems or cast any spells that might endanger his pack, although it seems that’s what he keeps trying to accuse me of.

It’s ignorance; it comes from the place where he holds his prejudice toward witches, and it pisses me off.

“Just because you’re an Alpha doesn’t mean you know everything,” I mutter.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

My eyes begin to adjust, and I see him more clearly. He’s wearing a tight black t-shirt, which contrasts with his deep burgundy eyes. His symmetrical, well-defined face is only making me angrier.

I bet he takes girls here—I bet this is the spot he takes all his she-wolves.

I go to turn, but then I stop.

“You know I’m sick of you questioning me like this,” I say. “I know this isn’t a real marriage, but we need some sort of trust. Didn’t I just help your pack out this morning? Or have you forgotten that already?”

“You did,” he agrees. “And I appreciated that. I’m pretty sure, I told you so.”

“And now you’re accusing me.”

“What do you think I’m accusing you of?”

“You tell me!” I exclaim. “You’re the accuser.”

Clearly, we’re getting nowhere. I should leave and save myself the frustration, but I’m too pissed off.

When we were friends, and Ellis didn’t know the truth about what I was, we never even argued once. I’d get heated and complain to him about all the shit I was receiving from my fellow ‘pack mates’, and he’d calm me down and offer advice.

While Ellis could still get grumpy back then, he’d never get cranky with me. He was kind to me—gentle.

I see now with even more clarity that was only the case when he thought I was a non-shifting wolf.

“Sorry, Danielle,” he says, shaking his head and huffing out a breath. “You’re trying to convince me that you coming out here into the woods, alone, at night, to a very hidden spot isn’t suspicious—but it’s not gonna work.”

Ellis is sharp—I’ll give him that. Even though he’s still being a total dick, I know that he has to thoroughly investigate potential threats.

Recently allied witch whom he believes he’s just met is definitely one of those.

I need an alibi of some sort.

“Look,” I say, softly, relaxing my shoulders, trying my best to ease the tension between us.

“The reason I came out here is because I'm finding adjusting a little difficult. More difficult than I thought. It’s not easy being away from my sisters, or my home, in a pack full of shifters who I know, deep down, hate my guts. I was looking for a place to be alone. This seemed like a good spot.”

He’s silent for a beat.

“They don’t hate your guts.”

They might not, but he definitely does.

“Whatever,” I say, a lump of emotion forming in my throat.

While what I told him was an alibi, it doesn’t mean that there was no truth to it.

The weight of my words hit me stronger than I thought they would.

It is difficult being back in a pack full of people who hate me. It’s even more difficult to marry and pretend not to know the person who completely broke my heart.

“Anyway,” I say, swiveling on my heel. “I’ll let you get back to whatever it was you were doing.”

Before I can leave, he says something that shocks me. “Wait,” he murmurs. “Stay.”

I freeze. It’s crazy; those two words are ones I longed to hear from him all those years ago in this very spot.

Now, they fill me with panic and dread.

I want to leave, so I can let out all the horrible, chaotic things interacting with him is making me feel. I need to be alone.

But what if this is a test?

If I were lying to him about my reason for coming out here, wouldn’t I want to scurry off?

Maybe he wants to see if I’m being sincere and if I can handle further questions.

I don’t know. I don’t claim to understand the intricacies and downright sociopathic mind-control methods of Alpha wolves.

I just need this alliance to work. For Penelope and for the coven.

“Okay,” I say slowly, reluctantly walking deeper into the space. My eyes rake over the area where that blanket once was.

I can still hear my pleasure-filled moans and the way that Ellis looked at me when I told him what I was.

That was the best and worst day of my life. Coming here, to this spot, was very obviously a mistake. But there’s nothing I can do about it now.

I might as well make conversation.

“This morning went well,” I say. “No forbidden spells or broken bones.”

Ellis nods. “Thankfully.”

The nature-filled hum of the night turns awkward as an uneasy silence drifts between us.

Beneath the illuminating light of the moon, I can see that Ellis is frowning. His dark, coppery eyebrows are arched, his burgundy eyes deep in irritated thought.

Why would he ask me to stay if he’s still so pissed off?

We stand in silence, and I rack my brain for things to say. All I can think about is the past, and all the things I shouldn’t say.

I’m on one side of our old secret spot and he’s on the other, staring up at the night sky.

I remember sneaking out here with him one night, before all the complicated stuff happened—we stole alcohol from his dad’s cabinet, and got drunk together for the first time.

At least, it was my first time.

I remember the world spinning; Ellis was looking up at the stars a little like the way he’s doing now. I was looking at him.

I knew that I wanted to kiss him, but I told myself I was just drunk, and then I asked him a question instead.

“How does it feel knowing you’re going to be the leader of this pack someday?”

He looked back at me and smiled. “It’s pretty terrifying.”

“Do you want to back out?”

“God no,” he said. “I don’t think life would be good without at least a little fear.”

I’m curious, why is he out here, and why is he so protective of this spot? They’re questions I’ve told myself I shouldn’t ask, but I let my curiosity get the better of me.

If he doesn’t remember anything, why does he come?

“So you often come out to this spot in the middle of the night?” I ask him.

His gaze flickers from the stars to me, and he repositions himself a little. I notice the way his muscular body moves beneath his tight shirt.

It makes something flutter deep inside my stomach.

“Not always at night,” he says, his voice coarse. “But I do come here a lot.”

“Why?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s quiet. I have a lot to deal with on a daily basis, so sometimes when shit gets a little noisy, it’s nice to come here to think. Or not to think. I don’t know.”

I nod, understanding that he makes being a leader seem effortless when it’s definitely not.

“That’s cool,” I say. “And you just stumbled upon it, right?”

He catches my eye, and we share a brief smile. I can already sense his mood lightning.

“I’m sorry I was a little harsh,” he says. “This place is just special to me, is all.”

And me. But the way he talks about it still doesn’t make any sense.

I don’t want to push.

“It’s fine,” I respond. “I wouldn’t want a wolf invading my private spaces either.”

He raises an eyebrow, and I laugh when I realize how that sounds.

“Gosh, I mean, not like that.”

His expression is laced with a subtle hint of amusement, and I feel my face growing hot.

Can I not do anything smoothly when I’m around him?

It’s as if I've forgotten how to control my emotions and how to express myself.

“I understand, although I wouldn’t be surprised if you meant that too.”

“Hmm,” I nod, as my body burns.

It’s like the more I try not to think about what happened that day, the more it comes up.

I try looking up at the moon, as though it’s going to somehow cool me down with its white glow. I can feel his gaze on me.

“You know there’s another reason this place is unique to me.”

I freeze. Oh my God, does he know? Is this whole thing a trap?

My mind begins to panic, and I plummet into a frenzy, thinking about how I can use my magic to escape.

Did the spell wear off? I wonder if my presence here has had an impact. I’m so stupid, so-

I take a breath.

Play it cool.

“Oh yeah? What’s that?” I ask, casually.

“It’s weird, I’ve fallen asleep out here a few times.

Every time, I have this strange dream. I hardly remember it when I wake up, but I can feel that it’s the same one.

Always about this girl. I don’t see her face or how she looks.

I’ve never met her, but in my dreams, I feel her. The connection is so strong.”

I swallow.

He has no idea, right? Why do I still feel so panicked then?

“Right,” I say. “Maybe she’s one of the she-wolves in your pack. Your mate or something?”

I notice my voice stammers as I say the last word. This is bad. I need to leave before he notices that something’s wrong.

“I don’t have a mate,” he says. “And she’s not because I’ve never met this woman in real life. I’m almost certain she doesn’t exist, but she feels strangely real.”

How do you know you’ve never met her?

Part of me wants to ask, but I quickly hold my tongue. It’s time to go, and in general, it’s time to keep a much further distance from him.

I feel like I’m either going to cry or have a panic attack. The idea that he remembers any part of our relationship, even in the form of a faceless, hazy dream, is too much.

“Interesting,” I say.

“Yeah.”

“Hey,” I murmur after a beat that feels like an eternity. “I think I’m going to head back, it’s getting a bit too late.”

“Okay,” he replies. “Good night.”

I look him in the eye one last time, keeping a cool, icy expression.

Once I’m far enough away, I let my tears fall.