Page 62 of Boys Who Taint (Spine Ridge University #5)

Grey

“So this is it? Aren’t you three going to kill each other now?” she says through gritted teeth. “You wanted to do it. What’s stopping you? Not me. I’m done. I’m done trying to keep you from ripping each other apart.”

“Aspen …” I mutter.

“No. I don’t want to hear it. Just kill each other and get it over with.”

“You don’t mean that,” Apollo says.

Tears well up in her eyes, but she blinks them away. “It’s destroying me.”

God.

All I wanted was to earn her love.

And I ruined it all.

I step closer, and when she backs away, I kneel in front of her. “I’m sorry.”

She frowns. “You’re all trying to hurt each other because of me.”

I avert my eyes.

She’s right. We did try to end each other on the beach.

But how could I not when I saw him on top of her, having his way with her?

“But Levi—”

“Levi didn’t hurt me,” she interjects. “He didn’t even kill Mavis, but she died because he fell in love with me, and I was too scared to get close.”

Apollo approaches too and listens in on our conversation.

“What do you mean?” I ask, glancing at Levi, who’s still standing farther away.

“He didn’t kill her! You saw the video. Levi told me the truth. They made a pact to forget about their unrequited love by jumping off the ledge. But in the end, he couldn’t do it. And then she fell.”

She rubs her forehead, clearly shaken up. “He’s been feeling guilty all this time and literally tried to jump to end it all. But I couldn’t let him die. I couldn’t … take my hands off him.”

Oh God.

It didn’t hit me until now.

She’s not just upset because of our fight.

She’s upset because she lost herself to him.

I grab her hand and squeeze it softly.

“I’m sorry.”

I don’t want to lose her. I can’t. I won’t.

“I loved you so much …” I try to protect my heart from shattering into a million pieces. “I loved you so much that I was blinded by jealousy because you never loved me back. It destroyed me little by little.”

“What?” she mutters. “What do you mean?”

“When I told you I loved you, you didn’t say it back.” The silence between us was deafening. “And I knew it was because of him.” I glance at Levi, who just stands there watching us. “You loved him more than you could ever love me.”

She shakes her head.

“And I don’t blame you. I’m a monster, I know that.

I lied to get my way. I was obsessed with the idea of having you, and I took it too far.

But I am so in love with you that I can’t see straight anymore.

If someone hurt you … I’d kill them in a heartbeat.

” I gently caress the bottom of her hand with my thumb.

“But I understand now. And I’m here, begging you for forgiveness.

For every lie I told. Every video I ever took.

I’m but a monster infatuated with a single girl. ”

I lower my eyes.

Even when I tried so hard to keep him away, he still found his way back into her heart.

I lost.

“Please … forgive me. I can’t live without your love.”

“You hear that? Got the boy begging on his knees,” Apollo muses.

I frown at him. “Really?”

“Don’t start something again, please,” she says. “I don’t want you three to fight over me.”

“That’s hard because there’s a lot of you to fight over.” Apollo bites, then licks his lips and winks.

Unbearable. But also too damn hot.

“She just got railed after saving a killer, and you’re already foaming at the mouth.”

“She’s not the only one who can make me go hard.” He winks at me, making me blush all over just because I’m reminded of that night in his bedroom.

Fuck.

He chuckles. “I meant in an actual fight.”

“Sure you did,” Aspen says, but she’s finally showing a smile again.

Apollo points at her face. “Made you laugh, though.”

She shakes her head. “You guys will never quit.”

“Not on you, no,” Apollo says, folding his arms. “But you won’t find me begging for mercy. I know what I did, but I was honest in my blackmail, and I’d do it again.” He tilts up her chin. “Because it finally let me have you.”

She blushes and snorts. “You guys almost have me convinced romance actually exists.”

I chuckle, and Apollo bursts out into laughter. “My version of romance is railing you two nonstop. Whether it’s in my bedroom, on the couch, the back seat of her car, in the yard outside, or maybe the woods. Wherever you want, I’m ready.”

“Oh my God,” she mutters under her breath.

“Yes?” Apollo raises a brow.

“You’re insufferable,” she adds.

Apollo makes a lateral click with his tongue and sticks up both his finger guns. “At your service.”

I clear my throat. “I’m trying to apologize over here.”

“Oh right,” he says. “Whatever you want, pretty boy. Do what you need to do to get our girl.”

I sigh out loud and focus on Aspen. “Can you forgive me? For all those cameras and the lies?”

“I …” She looks away for a second. “I have to think about it.”

She glances at Levi, who remains standing near the front door, as far away from us as possible.

The yearning in his eyes is palpable, even from here.

Apollo places a hand on my shoulder. “You’ve got every day of the rest of your life to make it up to her, don’t you?”

“What?” I mutter.

“But you’re both gonna have to share,” he adds with a wink. “Boyfriend.”

She pulls her hand out of mine, and for a second, it feels like rejection, until she suddenly darts right past me and straight for Levi, who collapses on the floor.

Levi

I thought I could handle the pain, and I wasn’t about to show these two fucks my weakness, but Grey cut into my abdomen so deep that my muscles are beginning to cave in on me.

Goddammit .

Aspen runs up to me and goes to her knees in front of me, picking up my arm to support it with her shoulder. “I’m here.”

Her pretty ocean eyes keep me afloat, keep me present, keep me from wanting to lash out at everything around me.

“C’mon. Let’s get you upstairs,” she says. “Apollo, help me!”

“Oh shit,” Apollo says as he hurries to support my other arm.

“I don’t need help,” I mutter, standing.

I shove them away, but the second I take a few steps into the room, the pain becomes too much, and I crash into Grey.

“What the—” He barely stays put with my weight on top. Sighing, he puts his shoulder underneath my arm. “Fine.”

I grumble with annoyance as he drags me toward the stairs.

“Let. Me. Go,” I growl.

“And let you fall again? I don’t think so,” he replies.

“Now, now, boys, play nice,” Apollo muses as he supports my other arm.

“I can walk,” I insist.

“We can see that,” Apollo says.

Aspen runs up the stairs and immediately raids Apollo’s room, and I can hear her throw stuff around.

“You looking for another mask, Freckles?” Apollo asks.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask.

“Oh, she went through my room once, trying to find her ‘stalker.’” He makes quotation marks with his free hand. “A.k.a. you.”

“Interesting. And you’ve been going behind my back to fuck her while pretending to protect her and Grey from me,” I quip.

“Not behind your back. Right in front of your eyes,” he retorts, grinning. “And I kept everyone alive, didn’t I?”

“Barely,” Grey grumbles, still holding me, despite the hate practically fuming off him, and the feeling is mutual.

When we get to my room, Aspen has already opened the box of supplies she stole from Apollo’s room and is rummaging through it until she finds what she’s looking for. After Grey and Apollo put me down on my bed, she barks, “Out of the way.”

They take a few steps back, watching us from the doorway, but all I can focus on is how she’s kneeling in front of me, and I swallow away the lump in my throat.

She dips a cotton pad into some alcohol and leans in. “This might hurt.”

She wipes my wound clean, but the pain doesn’t faze me as long as she’s here with me, looking at me, touching me. And when she stops, I grasp her wrist and make her stay.

I can’t.

I thought I could do this.

That I could die and she could live on …

But I can’t fucking do this without her.

“I …”

“Does it hurt?” she asks.

I shake my head. “Only the thought of losing you now.”

A blush spreads on her cheeks.

What do I say when words fail to explain the depth of my obsession?

“I’m not going anywhere,” she says.

I release her wrist, only to bring my hand to her face instead. Grey’s body tightens as he clutches the doorframe, but Apollo holds him back with a strong hand.

He knows better than anyone what’s possessed me for all these years as I caress her cheek.

For a short moment, she leans into the palm of my hand, and the feeling overwhelms me, making me smile.

Grey’s body visibly relaxes.

“Can’t you tell? He loves her,” Apollo says.

He’s right.

I love her so much that it wounded me to betray her like I did.

The pain cut so deep I was barely able to take it, but I had no other choice.

I had to see it through.

Until she came to find me and flipped my world on its axis.

The truth has a funny way of finding its way back to the surface.

She grabs some of the medical glue and starts patching me up, and I hiss.

“I cut too deep,” Grey says.

I glare at him from underneath my lashes. “It’s just a flesh wound. It’ll heal.”

“I could’ve killed you,” he adds.

“You wish,” I growl.

“I …” He sucks in a breath and sighs out loud. “I’m sorry.”

My eyes twitch.

What the fuck.

He’s apologizing?

After all the times I told him I wanted him dead?

Even Aspen puts the glue down and looks at him. “What did you just say?”

Grey swallows. “I don’t want to keep hurting you.”

She puts everything back into the medical box and stands up to face him.

“That’s the last thing I ever wanted,” he adds. “And I realize now that our fighting hurt you.”

She smiles, the freckles on her face lighting up. “Thank you. That’s the first time I’ve heard any of you being honest with me.”

He swallows again. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

She steps closer to him, too close to my liking, and says, “If you work hard enough to earn back my trust, I might forgive you.”

Suddenly, he grabs her face and kisses her out of the blue, surprising all of us, and I nearly jump to rip him away from her, when she practically melts away in his arms just like that.

One kiss and she’s done for.

“I love you. God, I love you. Please forgive me,” he murmurs.

He drops to his knees in front of her, completely enamored by her presence as he wraps his arms around her legs like only a beggar would. And a part of me wants to slice off his fingers when they’re touching her, but when her fingers start coiling through his white hair, I finally understand.

Even if I hate the mere idea with every fiber of my being, she needs him.

He gave her what I couldn’t—complete and utter devotion.

“Hey, whatever I did, I’m sorry too,” Apollo says, folding his arms. “If that gets me into a good make-up sesh.”

She throws him a raised brow, and it makes me snort … loud enough for them all to look at me next.

I get up from the bed and walk over to them all, and Grey immediately gets up to his feet like he’s ready for a second round.

But Aspen blocks him with her body as if she thinks I’m going to attack him again.

And I don’t blame her. For a long time, all I wanted to do was erase him from her life.

It didn’t matter that she’d hate me. That was the plan.

Until she kissed me.

I glance at them both, and their hands are slowly entwining beneath me.

After everything we did on that beach, I could never go back to hate.

Even if that means surrendering her to him.

Even if it kills me.

“Seeing you with him makes me madly jealous,” I mutter, as my hand rises to touch her face.

Grey flinches behind her, his hand reaching for his pocket where he undoubtedly keeps his knives, but I have no intention of starting another fight. This is her decision to make. Not ours.

“Do you want me or him ?”

Her face contorts. “Don’t make me choose. Please. I’m done having to choose.”

We all ruined her … tainted her beyond recognition.

It’s about time we fixed what we broke.

“I’m done denying myself what I want,” I say, caressing her cheek as my fingers slide through her hair. “And if that means I’ll have to share you, then so be it.”

“ Now you’re fine with it?” Apollo chuckles. “Could’ve saved me the trouble of sneaking behind your back.”

But I ignore him as I grab her face with both hands. My eyes search hers for the truth beneath all of our lies. “Do you want all of us?”

She shudders in place, sucking in the air through her teeth.

I grab a fistful of her hair and tilt her head back, making her look at me. “Use your words.”