Page 15

D ani turned the shower on and waited, biting her lip as she stared blindly at the spray while it warmed.

Okay, so she’d taken the coward’s way out.

It was no big deal… well, that’s what she told herself, anyway.

It wasn’t the first time they’d had no strings sex.

They’d scened every week for an entire year, and while they’d quickly become exclusive, it was only because things between them had been so good.

Why settle for hamburger when you could have steak?

Now? Well, it didn’t need to mean anything.

Except you’re still in love with him.

Impossible! She had never been in love with him.

It had just been a serious case of infatuation that might have been flirting with the edges of love.

But thankfully, it had been stamped out early on.

She didn’t even know him. Not properly. The people they’d been with each other at the club weren’t the people they were in everyday life.

They’d been kink partners. Perfectly matched, maybe.

For her anyway. But clearly not for Zack since he’d felt the need to lie to her about having a wife.

She stepped into the shower, letting the hot water cascade over her body. As she lathered up, her mind kept racing with those dratted ‘what ifs.’

What if she hadn’t pushed him.

What if she’d let him explain like he’d wanted to.

A sliver of apprehension shivered through her when she thought back on that. He’d seemed so genuine. So insistent.

She’d thought she understood why Zack lied about being married, but now she was allowing those long-buried memories to resurface, nothing made sense. Why would he need to explain something if he was only using it as a means to stop her getting too close?

And why use something that extreme; something that was guaranteed to send her running?

The nature of their kink relationship meant he could have just told her he wanted to stop.

She’d have accepted that, no questions asked.

Sure, Dani had been in deep enough she’d have been upset, but she wouldn’t have caused a scene.

That was the nature of the BDSM lifestyle.

You played, you enjoyed yourself, you may or may not hook up again.

But unless you negotiated a contract, both parties were free to walk away. No drama. No questions asked.

That’s just how it was.

Dani leaned her forehead against the cool tile, letting the water beat down on her back. She closed her eyes, trying to sort through the jumble of emotions swirling inside her.

Doubt crept in, insidious and unwelcome. Had she jumped to conclusions? Made assumptions without giving Zack a fair chance to explain? The memory of his face - hurt, confused, desperate to make her understand - flashed through her mind.

Why did these things insist on haunting her?

She shook her head, sending droplets flying. No, she couldn't second-guess herself now. The evidence had been clear. Kris Warwick’s report showed one single marriage with someone with Zack’s name; one that couldn’t possibly be him.

But a tiny, insistent voice whispered: What if there was more to the story?

With a frustrated groan, Dani shut off the water and reached for a towel. She'd made her choice. She'd had her fun and kicked him out. It was done.

Except... she hadn’t actually told him to leave. Just suggested it. Just assumed he would.

Heart pounding, she wrapped the towel around herself and cracked open the bathroom door. Steam billowed out as she peered into the bedroom, half-expecting - hoping? Or would she be disappointed? - to find it empty.

She found Zack standing there, fully clothed.

"We need to talk," he said firmly, his expression stoic and waaay too serious.

"Zack! What the hell? Why are you still here?" Dani pushed an indignation she wasn’t really feeling into her voice, gripping the towel to secure it properly and give herself a modicum of defense against her nakedness. This guy was far too potent.

He didn't budge. "No more running away, Dani. No more hiding. We're going to hash this out right now."

Her heart raced as she stared at him, water dripping from her hair. Part of her wanted to yell at him to get out. But a bigger part was relieved he hadn't left, that he seemed as desperate for answers as she was.

"Fine," she said shakily. "Just... let me get dressed first."

Zack's eyes roamed over her almost naked form, darkening with desire. It was enough to have her mouth go dry, even though she’d just had him…

it had been a while since she’d entertained anything but BOB, after all.

Perhaps they could just enjoy each other for a little longer before they started any ‘come to Jesus’ conversations that might spoil it all again.

But clearly, Zack was more determined than she was.

"Agreed," he said, his voice rough. "I'll wait outside." He turned and strode out of the room, closing the door behind him with a soft click.

Dani let out a shaky breath, her mind whirling.

What did he want to say? What could possibly explain everything that had happened?

The way he’d behaved? The things he’d said?

Or was he going to admit it was all a lie?

The chances of him having any kind of excuse she’d find acceptable was slim.

Better just get this over with; it was bound to just reinforce her contempt for his actions.

And she damn well needed that right now, before he fooled her again.

Drying off quickly, Dani pulled on a pair of comfortable cropped yoga pants and a tank top, her hands trembling slightly as she dressed.

When she opened the door, Zack was leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes met hers, and the intensity in them made her breath catch.

"Sit," he said, gesturing to the lounge chairs on her veranda. It wasn't a request.

Dani hesitated for a moment, then complied, perching on the edge of her seat. Zack remained standing, pacing back and forth in the small space in front of her.

"I need you to listen to me," he began, his voice low and urgent. "Really listen. No interruptions, no assumptions. Can you do that?"

She nodded, her throat too tight to speak anyway. She didn’t like the implications.

Zack took a deep breath. "I was… am married.”

Dani sucked in a painful breath, bands constricting around her chest as she fought the urge to run. To rage.

“Hear me out!” Zack demanded as if he knew. Hell, it was probably written all over her face. “It’s complicated.”

"How complicated can it be?" Dani snapped, her patience fraying. "You're either married or you're not."

Jesus! She was having a Deja vu moment. They’d already had this conversation.

How could she have been so stupid? He’d told her he was married. Zack was many things, but a liar wasn’t one of them. She’d simply justified his words however she could, to mitigate her own guilt.

And now she’d had sex with a married man… again!

Zack ran a hand through his hair, frustration evident in every line of his body. "It's not that simple. I was fifteen when it occurred. Fifteen, Dani. I didn't even know what was happening."

Dani's eyes widened, her anger momentarily forgotten, brought to an abrupt halt as she remembered Kris’s report. But the reality of it was… astounding. "What are you talking about?"

"My father…" Zack spat the word like it was poison. "Arranged a marriage for me when I was fifteen. To a twelve-year-old girl I'd never met. He made some deal with her mother I don’t even understand to this day.”

He paused in his pacing, throwing his head back, dislodging his glasses as he jammed the heels of his hands into his eyes, his whole body quivering with rage.

“The girl, her name was - is - Emylyah, I didn’t even find that out until years later. Even then it was by accident… something my father’s lawyer brought up after his death when he asked if I had a prenuptial agreement to protect my assets.”

He clenched his fists so his knuckles turned white, his anger palpable. “We saw each other for fifteen minutes in a judge's chambers, and that was it. I haven't seen her since."

Dani sat back, stunned. "But... how is that even legal?"

“Believe it or not, even today minors can be married in California. It simply needs judicial and parental agreement.”

Dani shook her head in disbelief. “But surely no judge…”

"Money," Zack interrupted bitterly. "Wave enough money in front of the right judge, and it’s a done deal. Hell, some just consider it a valid point of law!”

Dani’s mind was reeling. "But why?"

Zack's jaw clenched and he shook his head, defeat evident in every line of his body. “I don’t even know. My father died without ever mentioning it, in life or in any paperwork. It was only because the lawyer holding my father’s will was the same one who’d overseen the original agreement that the subject even arose, otherwise I’d still be clueless. Can you believe that?”

Dani took several deep breaths and rubbed her hands over her face. “I don’t understand…”

Zack laughed, but there was no humor in it. “Join the club,” he replied, drily.

“How could you not know? Surely you must have questioned why you were there?”

Zack turned to stare out onto the tropical vista of sea and sky and scented flora, but his eyes looked back into the past.

The beauty of the setting was clearly lost to him, and he was swallowed by memories he obviously wished he could forget, if his expression was any indication.

“You’d think so, wouldn’t you,” he mused.

“I remember so many things about that day…

Standing outside the judge's chamber, my father's hand on my shoulder in an iron grip that made me uneasy. The smell of cigars and expensive cologne, cloying and inescapable. If I close my eyes, I can almost hear the murmur of voices, hushed and conspiratorial, discussing terms and arrangements. But I wasn’t really listening.”

He dragged his fingers through his hair and collapsed onto the lounge chair as if the weight of his memories were too heavy for him to stay upright. Dani had the overwhelming urge to go give him a hug, to take away the confusion and pain that ravaged his features.

Absently, Zack removed his glasses and polished the lenses on his shirt, his gaze still distant, focused on a single day so long ago.

“I remember the girl. She was pretty. All blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin. And I was a fifteen-year-old boy, so of course I noticed her, although I pegged her as younger than she really was.”

Dani tried to keep the grimace off her face. This unknown woman Zack was married to was the very antithesis of her own typically Italian looks.

“Of course, I wondered why we were there, and I expected to be told when the adults had finished their discussions.”

Something troublesome and unsettling wreathed across his face. “But in the end, none of it seemed important.”

Dani held her breath for his next words, already knowing they were going to be bad.

“The doors to the judge’s chambers burst open and a bunch of men - thugs - surged through. They weren’t discriminating, they just fired sub-machine guns and sprayed the room with bullets.”

His face crumpled a little, and she could imagine innocent, young Zack, terrified for his life.

He could have been injured. He might have been killed. The thought made Dani's blood run cold. She might have lost him before she ever knew him. Her heart rejected the idea. It didn’t bear thinking about.

That’s when she knew she was already in too deep with Zack, even though they’d only just reconnected, despite all her arguments to the contrary.

“What happened?” Dani whispered, not sure she really wanted to know.